D&D 5E So long and thanks for all the fish!

[rgoodbb]

Meanwhile ...

Spiton/De-Door were faced with a conundrum. Before them was a mine entrance along with cart and rails and next to the entrance was a large crate. They chose to pry open the crate and look inside. Upon inspection it was full of packing sand. They swished their hands/pseudopods around in it but came up empty. At this time a great blizzard of a snowstorm was hitting their wayward side of the mountain. They had to quickly make an uncomfortable choice of shelter.

“Sandbox or Railroad?………"

 

[Lanefan]

No one told me there would be fish.

Yeah, no-one told me there would be thanks either.

 

[BoldItalic]

“Sandbox or Railroad?………"

Spiton had to decide. It was time to man up and take responsibility for something. He quickly googled "sandbox lyrics" on his iLute.

In my sandbox
New adventures every day.
In my sandbox
There's no place I'd rather stay.
In my sandbox,
Won'tcha come out and play?
In my sandbox...my sandbox.

All you need's an empty pail, a shovel, and a cup

"Hey guys," he asked, "Did anyone bring a shovel?"

Hermione was unimpressed. "Forsooth, Bard, this be not time for ninny-nannying. Let the choice be mine."

"Okay, go ahead. Which will you choose?"

"I just said, cloth-ears. It's mine. We choose the mine."

"Oh, nice pun. Can I set it to music?"

"Why do you have to be so chaotic?"

"It's what my character would do. I'm playing to my flaw. Despite my best efforts, I am unreliable to my friends."

 

[rgoodbb]

Spiton the Bard was in heaven. Well not literally, but still. Whooshing at 62 MPH cornering down a mineshaft, his long blond sheeeemering hair flamboyantly flowing behind him. He could not be happier. His newlywed De-Door had soaped the wheels of the carts and now they were flamboyantly whizzing ahead and gaining speed. Unfortunately there was not enough room for Titicaca to be flamboyantly played, now that would have been fabulous. Spiton ventured a flamboyant glance back at the cart behind him.


“So….Betwixt and between. What’s the difference really? I mean c’mon.” Asked Gildan

“Abracadabra and Expelliarmus”

“Not the same. Not even the same context. Nope. Nowhere near. Not having that.”

“Whither or nither that be case…”

“Y’see. There you go again.”

“I understand thee less than might a snarking dog”

“Y’know what? Forget I said anything.”

“Forget and beget thyne follicle endings forthwith…”

“Oh boy...”

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

As they descended deeper and deeper, one thought came to Spiton:

*Can I set it to music?*

The question echoed around in his head like a shout in a large, open underground space...

*Can I set it to music? Can I set it to music? Of COURSE I can...but first, I need a title.*

"Hmmmm..."
*You Could Be Mine*
"Nope."
*90 Mine Problems*
"Nah."
*Red, Red Mine*
"Uh-uh. This could be tougher than I thought."

"What are you mumbling about, Spiton?"

"Oh nothing, just have something on my mine...errrr...mind."

 

[BoldItalic]

It's all mine, my precious, said a voice from far below.

Nasssty fissshes!

 

[rgoodbb]

Meanwhile...

Throg was hanging upside down looking at his own dripping blood painting pretty pictures in the snow below him. Ten feet away lay his Battleaxe of Meaningful Significance half buried in the white crust.

An arctic Owlbear had come at him leaping through the white mirk of the blizzard. It had gained a surprise round...

This placed Throg son of Throg in an existential quandary. Surely there was no longer a surprise round. But He’d been surprised and he felt that he couldn’t react yet…and this was not a round yet but initiative had been ….so…. uhm… Using his combined Wisdom and Intelligence of 6 (which had been lowered again since the departure of Bar De-Door), Throg’s nose bled a lot more. He knew this didn’t he?

The pain in his ankle by which he was being lifted up, jolted him back from his less than deep thinking.

“Whooooo”

“I am Throg Throggsonn, Son of Throg”

“Whooooo, whooooo……..”

 

[BoldItalic]

It was Throg's turn. He used his bonus action to Rage and his action to make a Shove attack against the owlbear. The DM ruled that, because he was hanging upside down and pinned by his ankle, his attack was at disadvantage but Throg pointed out that Rage gave him advantage on Strength checks, so that cancelled out. He rolled 17+4=22 against the owlbear's Strength roll of 14+5=19. He knocked the owlbear prone, then used his own movement to stand up and move away. This provoked an AOO from the owlbear but at disadvantage because it was prone, and it missed.

Then it was the owlbear's turn ...

 

[rgoodbb]

...The old cart hit a buffer and gracefully stopped. The second cart however crashed dramatically into the first and all four adventurers were violently flung into the air amongst a shower of dust and splinters. The huge cavern they were falling down into sported the sharpest of stalegm...no stalect...no...pointy rocks. Each adventurer in turn failed their Acrobatics saving throws. Luckily as a reaction The Ultimate Tank reached out with his Aura of Bubbles and graced them all with a soft and slidy landing.

"Where are we" Asked Sister Hermione, composing herself

"ENsider Forum arCave I think" Replied the Spiton the Bard of Flamboyance and Lore. "I think we're safe. I don't think anything hangs around this area anymore. Maybe just the odd Troll........"

 

[lowkey13]

*Deleted by user*