RPG Evolution: When Gaming Bleeds

Monte Cook Games recently released Consent in Gaming, a sensitive topic that addresses subjects that make some players uncomfortable. Central to the understanding of why there's a debate at all involves the concept of "bleed" in role-play.

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Picture courtesy of Pixabay.​

Bleed Basics

Courtney Kraft explains bleed:
It’s a phenomenon where the emotions from a character affect the player out of the game and vice versa. Part of the joy of roleplay comes from diving into the fantasy of being something we’re not. When we play a character for a long time, it’s easy to get swept up in the highs of victorious battle and the lows of character death. When these feelings persist after the game is over, that’s when bleed occurs.
Bleed isn't inherently bad. Like actors in a movie, players sometimes draw on experiences to fuel their role-playing, consciously or subconsciously, and this bleed can happen organically. What's of concern in gaming is when bleed has detrimental consequences to the player.

Consent in Gaming explains the risks of negative bleed:
There’s nothing wrong with bleed—in fact, it’s part of the reason we play games. We want to be excited when our character is excited, to feel the loss when our characters do. However, bleed can cause negative experiences if not handled carefully. For example, maybe a character acted in a way that your character didn’t like, and it made you angry at the player too. Or maybe your character is flirting with another character, and you’re worried that it’s also making you have feelings for the player. It’s important to talk about these distinctions between characters and players early and often, before things take an unexpected turn.
There are several aspects that create bleed, and it's central to understanding why someone would need consent in a game at all. Bleed is a result of immersion, and the level of immersion dictates the social contract of how the game is played. This isn't limited to rules alone, but rests as much on the other players as it is on the subject matter.

One of the experiences that create bleed is a player's association with the game's subject matter. For some players, less realistic games (like Dungeons & Dragons) have a lower chance of the game's experiences bleeding into real life, because it's fantasy and not analogous to real life. Modern games might have the opposite effect, mirroring real life situations a player has experience with. There are plenty of players who feel otherwise of course, particularly those deeply involved in role-playing their characters for some time -- I've experienced bleed role-playing a character on a spaceship just as easily as a modern game.

The other element that can affect bleed is how the game is played. Storytelling games often encourage deeper emotional involvement from a player, while more gamist tabletop games create a situational remove from the character by their nature -- miniatures, tactical combat, and other logistics that are less about role-playing and more about tactics. Live Action Role-Playing games (LARPs) have the player physically inhabit their role and are thus provide more opportunities for bleed. Conversely, Massive Multi-Player Online Role-Playing Games (MMORPGs) might seem like they make bleed unlikely because the player is at a computer, experiencing the game through a virtual avatar -- and yet it can still happen. Players who play a game for a long time can experience more bleed than someone who just joined a game.

Dungeons & Dragons is a particular flashpoint for discussions of bleed, because while it is a fantasy game that can easily be played with disposable characters navigating a dungeon, it can also have surprisingly emotional depth and complexity -- as many live streams of tabletop play have demonstrated.

These two factors determine the "magic circle," where the reality of the world is replaced by the structure of another reality. The magic circle is not a magic wall -- it's porous, and players can easily have discussions about what's happening in the real world, make jokes derived from popular culture their characters would never know, or even just be influenced by their real life surroundings.

The deeper a player engages in the magic circle, the more immersed that player becomes. Governing the player's social contract within the magic circle is something Nordic LARP calls this "the alibi," in which the player accepts the premise that their actions don't reflect on them but rather their character:
Rather than playing a character who is very much like you (“close to home”), deliberately make character choices that separates the character from you and provides some differentiation. If your character has a very similar job to your ideal or actual job, find a reason for your character to change jobs. If your character has a very similar personality to you, find aspects of their personality that are different from yours to play up and focus on. Or play an alternate character that is deliberately “further from home”.

Bleeding Out

Where things get sticky is when real life circumstances apply to imaginary concepts. Bleed exists within the mind of each player but is influenced by the other players. It is fungible and can be highly personal. Additionally, what constitutes bleed can be an unconscious process. This isn't necessarily a problem -- after all, the rush of playing an awesome superhero can be a positive influence for someone who doesn't feel empowered in real life -- unless the bleed touches on negative subjects that makes the player uncomfortable. These psychological triggers are a form of "bleed-in," in which the player's psychology affects the character experience. Not all bleed moments are triggers, but they can be significantly distressing for players who have suffered some form of abuse or trauma.

Consent in Gaming attempts to address these issues by using a variety of tools to define the social contract. For players who are friends, those social contracts have likely been established over years through both in- and out-of-game experiences. But for players who are new to each other, social contracts can be difficult to determine up front, and tools like x-cards can go a long way in preventing misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Thanks to the increasing popularity of tabletop role-playing games, players are coming from more diverse backgrounds with a wide range of experiences. An influx of new players means those experiences will not always be compatible with established social contracts. The recent incident at the UK Gaming Expo, as reported by Darryl is an egregious example of what happens when a game master's expectations of what's appropriate for a "mature" game doesn't match the assumed social contract of players at the table.

This sort of social contract reinforcement can seem intrusive to gamers who have long-suffered from suspicion that they are out of touch with reality, or that if they play an evil character, they are evil (an allegation propagated during the Satanic Panic). This need to perform under a "cover" in their "real" life has made the entire concept of bleed and its associated risks a particularly sensitive topic of discussion.

X-cards and consent discussions may not be for everyone, but as we welcome new players with new experiences into the hobby, those tools will help us all negotiate the social contract that makes every game's magic circle a magical experience.
 

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Michael Tresca

Michael Tresca


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and somehow the only way this planned 40+ session campaign can be derailed is if someone can't handle blood. like, change the bbeg to a lich or skeleton or something if the inclusion of this player is so intrinsic to the campaign happening.

again, I can't begin to comprehend how this hypothetical DM would handle something as innocent as players going down the wrong hallway.


you're the one who said the best cake is only possible when they are unconstrained, but okay a cake with a jar full of pickles. no, not mixed into the batter and baked, like I made a hole in the cake and literally just dump a jar of pickles into it and put frosting on it like a typical cake.

so the DM who can think on the fly and create a scenario that makes everyone happy is somehow not as good as the one who demands their story goes exactly as planned and will drop the game at the slightest possibility of altering something in the adventure, got it.

I mean if you want to ignore the rest of what I said that's fine, but the point is the grandma not being okay with violence in the game is not analogous to a player at a convention not being okay with something like torture. reasonable expectations vs. unknowable surprises.
actually you misunderstand. I was talking about the player feeling as if they just cannot go on. Not the dm. If everyone else WANTS a gore filled campaign and the player cant handle gore im not going to change that. They can leave. Could i change it? Yes. It would be easy. But it would be a betrayal to the rest of the players. Simple.

"you're the one who said the best cake is only possible when they are unconstrained, but okay a cake with a jar full of pickles. no, not mixed into the batter and baked, like I made a hole in the cake and literally just dump a jar of pickles into it and put frosting on it like a typical cake."

I feel like ive convinced anyone who can be of my points involving this fairly adequately. Not gonna waste my time on it further. I think you also see the point but its getting tiresome. So im dropping the cake thing as you are now approaching beating dead horse territory.

"so the DM who can think on the fly and create a scenario that makes everyone happy is somehow not as good as the one who demands their story goes exactly as planned and will drop the game at the slightest possibility of altering something in the adventure, got it."

Never said that one dm is better or worse. Though i did allude to favorites. Personal preference in dms.

That said, the dm who can make the changes on the fly but doesnt NECESSARAILY do it if it would be a poor decision to do so is probably the superiorly skilled dm as they could change at the drop of the hat but have the wisdom not to if it wouod cheapen the story. This is assuming you have players who dont want a sterilized game in some capacity. Saying "NO" and maintaining player satisfaction is a skill in itself.

"I mean if you want to ignore the rest of what I said that's fine, but the point is the grandma not being okay with violence in the game is not analogous to a player at a convention not being okay with something like torture. reasonable expectations vs. unknowable surprises."

It sure is relevant if you are at an X rated con of some kind and someone doesnt read the disclaimer at your table.

Can you stop hassling me please? I dont think you have been trying to see my side of things at all. Im getting triggered you could say. ;)
 



I mean, not a better look than ignoring questions and avoiding a conversation.

You are going to have to work on your technique in baiting me. You aren't very good at it yet.

you said this push for x-cards made you leery about the motivations behind it.

Indeed. I've been trying to find a way to answer the question without being overly provocative. But in general, I think I've hinted around enough that I think that the desired upshot is to make gaming more unsafe and not less. Still working on a way to express that in ways that won't lock the thread or cause you to claim I'm being "silly" without actually stopping to think about it.

after you didn't respond I brought it up again. though as far as I can tell you seem to think there's some group trying to ruin gaming as you know it forever, which seems a little silly.

First of all, I don't owe you are response. And secondly, I can protect my own tables just fine, but in general I do believe that there are groups trying to ruin gaming forever, just as there are some that believe any pushback is solely from people who want to keep gaming ruined forever. I mean, surely you've noticed that some are suggesting that gaming is presently and historically pervasively toxic, and that this is essential to reforming that toxic culture? So which is sillier?

I'm not sure I'm actually aligned with either side of this larger argument. Like Treebeard, I'm not sure I'm entirely on either side because I'm not sure either side is entirely on mine. But one thing I'm sure of, I don't trust our newly self-appointed Moral Betters.
 

@Panda-s1 you do realize i was joking about being triggered right? If you do and i legitimately made you laugh good. Im glad. Everyone benefits from a good laugh.

I just think you are a dishonest man or woman who shows little shame. My points are clear.

Also you totally do traffic in mockery and twisting of words entirely too much. For instance, everyone sees the way you use the laughing emoticon and the way you converse. Its obvious. You do this when you think you are losing some kind of an argument (which this isnt supposed to be. Its supposed to be a discussion. But you needle people a lot.). Im not trying to mock you back which is what i think you want.

Like i said. My points are made. You can take them, leave them, or mock them. But mockery is no stand in for reason.
 

It's a tool. If you put an X card in the middle of the table and no one uses it, that single card is not impacting your game at all. Should be no biggie, right? If it gets tapped then the player is in distress. Why would I ignore that? Same with a social contract. It's information. It's good to know.

Scenario 1
The PC who snuck ahead in villain's lair gets overwhelmed by thugs, and is about to be locked in a small dark closet. This PC has faced far worse, but player taps the X card. I'm surprised, but can easily shift the scenario. I don't need to know details. Game isn't interrupted, and player doesn't have to leave session.

Scenario 2
My player characters are in a plane that's going down. I'm getting into all the little details, the panic, the desperate pilot, etc. Suddenly, it occurs to me I might have a plane crash survivor at my table, and maybe I'm about to freak out a player. No one is tapping X card though, so I'm good to go.

Sounds useful for all involved. I don't get the vehement criticism. I really don't.

Because while its just a game, there are lessons to be learn't from the experience of gaming which could actually have long term benefits for a very short term amount of discomfort. I help run a club (literally called Nerd club) and I have ran sessions that have been intense emotionally (NPC's dying who were loved/ surprise attacks when people think they are in a safe space such as a town/ betrayal in general). For some of the younger players they had never even considered certain concepts that were presented and afterwards we had a discussion; a good number of these players went on to thank me in some various way in the future for these talks and sessions a few have stated they view me as a mentor.

Because life is harsh, cruel and will come at you from the left field and turn what you know upside down; there is no X card. At times you have to face your dragon, so why not begin facing that dragon in game labelled as such?
 


Because while its just a game, there are lessons to be learn't from the experience of gaming which could actually have long term benefits for a very short term amount of discomfort. I help run a club (literally called Nerd club) and I have ran sessions that have been intense emotionally (NPC's dying who were loved/ surprise attacks when people think they are in a safe space such as a town/ betrayal in general). For some of the younger players they had never even considered certain concepts that were presented and afterwards we had a discussion; a good number of these players went on to thank me in some various way in the future for these talks and sessions a few have stated they view me as a mentor.

Because life is harsh, cruel and will come at you from the left field and turn what you know upside down; there is no X card. At times you have to face your dragon, so why not begin facing that dragon in game labelled as such?
I second this. It really happens often that a player is prepared for something in life because they got their feet wet in a game. The world doesnt have a dm to protect you. (No offense to religious folk. Also i think most of you will agree that most of your religions also have examples of a dm (your god) in the game of life who in fact sometimes allows you to be beset by dangers. Perhaps with a purpose but none the less some dangers so this applies to you too. Im not leaving you out. I thought about you too.) In the real world pain hurts. Hearts break. What better place to strengthen than in a place like d&d (provided it fits the style of the dm and group)?
 


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