Just to be clear, I am talking about my own preferences rather than making some sort of mandate.This is an interesting statement. Why should VTTs emulate in person play? They aren't in person play, there are different capabilities and chalkenges from in person play, so why shouldn't VTTs offer a different experience?
That said, tabletop RPGs are a unique form of entertainment. I like the experience they provide. I use VTTs in order to be able to play them with folks I do not live near, or otherwise can't play with regularly. It's true that the experience must by definition be different, since we aren't all around the same table, but leaning to heavily into the techology makes it a different kind of play experience. There is certainly a place for more of a video game/VTT hybrid (and there are some out there) but that's not tabletop RPG play.
Some games can really benefit from the tools available via VTT, of course. Complex games can do a lot of math in the background, for example, and managing lots of enemies with lots of different abilities is easier in some VTTs. But, for me, adding sound effects and rain overlays and animated tokens and so on starts to change the experience enough that it is no longer tabletopRPG play. Everyone's lines and preferences are different of course, and generally it is easier to ignore elements than add them, so I am not opposed to such things being available, I just don't want to use them.
And I really want to be able to easily draw a map like I was sketching on a dry erase board.