Much of the time, play goes exactly as you describe, but that's not the rule, it's just how it often goes.
When you describe "players on the move," you include these:
- I say what the NPCs do
- I describe them the environment
- I ask them provocative questions
- I describe straightforward reactions of the NPCs
And then you say...
- Last but not least, I am also watching for any impulses or triggers for me to play my move.
In fact,
all of the above are impulses or triggers for you to play your move.
When a player says "I find Mice and ask her what she knows about the water cult," you can say "she's about to answer when an enormous explosion rips through the hardhold. There's smoke, screaming, fire, blood. Everyone down by the windmill - that's where the explosion is - takes 3-harm, which means that I don't know how many NPCs are killed. 15? 30? I'll have to sort it out later. Are any of you down there right now?"
Any time it's your turn to speak, choose any move you want. The rule isn't that it should be soft, the rule is that you should choose a move with an in-fiction cause to back it up ("misdirect"), and you should look at everything you own through crosshairs. This is on pages 82-84.
You know how you always say what honesty demands, what your prep demands, and what the rules demand.
The rules never force you to hold back from honesty or your prep in the name of making a "soft move."
Sometimes you absolutely seize control of the game when the players don't expect it, because honesty demands it or your prep demands it.
The threat moves are even more aggressive than the basic MC moves. As soon as there's a threat in play, you should be thinking about where and how they're going to push the PCs, and you should always be willing to make hard, direct moves and interrupt the players to do it.
You don't have to wait for them to miss a roll, or for them to blatantly ignore something you're setting up. Those are examples of opportunities, but you can take any opportunity you get.
In sum:
there's no down-phase in the conversation where the players are in control and you're hanging back. Sometimes it happens that the players are in control and you're hanging back, but it's not a phase they can rely on.
You can always, with no warning, seize control with a hard and direct move, if honesty or your prep demands it. The rules never stop you from doing that, and
you don't have to wait for them to miss a roll.