The characters are on the mission to destroy the giants and end the raids...
REAL MAN: "The bigger they are, the easier I hit! LET'S ROLL! WHAT?!?! STEALTH?!?! What kind of a freak are you?!?!?"
REAL ROLE-PLAYER: "We must obviously be sensitive to the needs of these poor souls... Perhaps they were driven out by forces beyond our understanding. We should approach stealthily and observe the situation first..."
LOONY: "I'll run to see the king, dressed in whip cream and a pineapple. While I've got the surprise, you people come in from behind and STRIKE!!!"
MUNCHKIN: *Sigh* Yep... yep... yep... time to dust off the wand of god's hemorrhoidal wrath again...
The characters are delving into the underdark to find the dark elves...
REAL MAN: Yelling into a large open cavern "HEY, YOU VELVET PANSIES! WHERE THE &%^$ ARE YOU! COME OUT HERE IN THE LIGHT, YOU COWARDS!"
REAL ROLE-PLAYER: "I shall don my stolen piwafwi, my symbol ot the ruling drow house, don my disguise, and try to establish trade relations with the drow outpost in the next cavern."
LOONY: ""I shall try to establish trade relations with the hook horror in the next cavern."
MUNCHKIN: Pad and paper in hand "Let's see... drow wizards are 1,221 xp each... hook horrors are 873 xp... Vampiric half-fiend demi-liches are... WOW! Too much stuff, so little time!"
The Characters encounter Lolth in her lair in the Abyss:
REAL MAN: "Yo, she-witch! LET'S GO!"
REAL ROLE-PLAYER: "Hold, foul demon-spawn! Though you may assail me with your chaotic magics, your foul creations, your archnidic allies, you will not prevail. With the powers at my command, I will-" (SPLAT!)
LOONY: "You guys have fun - I'm going back to get some action from the succubus in the last room."
MUNCHKIN: "Oooh, there's a yochlol - that's 3,457 xp... OOH! OOH! OOH! There's 12 carnivorous phase-spiders! That's worth 12,512 XP right there! And over there, 14 phase-doppleganger elf-trolls! They worth 3 thous-" (SPLAT!)
