14 year old girl wants to join my game

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We know that 99.9% of the time nothing would happen. The 14-year old would join the game, play well, and have fun. Everyone else would treat her properly, and she'd be safe. It would probably be a good experience for both sides.

But the costs of that 0.1%, a false accusation (or even, god forbid, a true accusation), are just so amazingly high that it's not worth it. Losing your reputation, job and livelyhood is way too high a risk for a D&D game.
 

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Reminds me of a funny story:

My flatmate and I (both in our 30s) went to the FLGS to enquire about joining a new D&D game that one of the guys at the store was running. My flatmate walked in on the middle of the same DM running a game group for kids between about 10 and 15 out the back of the store.

One of the kids spots my flatmate and yells out "Hey, somebody's dad is here!". :p

...it's even funnier than it sounds, because my flatmate was really touchy about his age at that point. :lol:
 

Jeysie said:
I guess I just find it extremely disappointing the thought that the law prevents someone from doing something legal, rather than preventing someone from doing something illegal like it's supposed to. Plus if the parents and teenager are OK with it, I don't really see who's supposed to be doing the slandering? *is confused*

If the parents weren't OK with it, there might be a problem... but then, if the parents weren't OK with it, the girl wouldn't be able to play anyway.

I dunno, maybe Massachusetts really is a good state. I've never heard of anyone I know getting so paranoid over this sort of thing... or even worrying about it at all.

Peace & Luv, Liz
Put it this way...sometime in the future, imagine that either the girl or her parents have a falling out with the DM or another member of the group, and go to the press with false accusations. Imagine the unholy glee with which the tabloid press would jump upon a story like "Fourteen year old girl seduced into occult group by teacher in his thirties!". It would be the good old 80s D&D witch-hunt all over again. BADD, Jack Chick...you get the picture.

...it would be nice to ascribe the best of intentions to people, but unfortunately in this flawed world we live in, your #1 priority is often covering your own ass. :\
 

Arrgh! Mark! said:
Greetings, all.

A strange event occured recently; I recieved an email from my yahoo group messageboard from a random person wanting to play. Logically enough I asked a few questions - how old, what games did they like, that sort of thing - and got back a message that it was a 14 year old and she likes Shadowrun.

By profession I'm a teacher, and while I have no theoretical problem with gaming with a young girl (Always good to increase the gamers around the place) but I could see a bunch of real problems. Anyway, I sent an email back saying it would be unlikely, there's the problems of off-colour jokes, language and the like and that I'd have to meet and greet her parents if anything was to happen at all. Also, I mentioned that there were other options for her - there's a place in town that organises gamers together. I haven't recieved a message back as yet. Her original e-mail read like it was mature and she mentioned that she had already spoken with her parents about the fact she was talking to people over the internet.

Our group is a bunch of professionals and my ball-and-chain, a group going back 10 years of play-time. We've always had an open door policy of new people, though we've never had a problem of younger kids in the game.

Has anyone else had any experiences with this? Advice, or problems?

I think I have a problem with your posts. I don't think that you are giving all of the facts or you just don't like 14 year old girls and 40 year old men. :D :p :lol:

Seriously though, what do you teach at age 19 that makes you such an expert on life that you can judge how a 40 year old man or a 14 year old girl will fit in your gaming life? Your other players are for the record, 16, 17 and 20, so a 14 year old girl, with permission from the parents, is not that bad of a fit and remembering back to my own male youth, probably more mature. I could see the odd joke arising once or twice but as a responsible DM a quick, "let's keep it clean," speech on your part to the other players would most likely be enough to stop that in its tracks.

As to the 40 year old man, well, as Wiz Boot said, "wait until your 40". I'm not there yet, but soon. What you say might be true, he might be weird, I can only wonder what you will be like at 40 since you now at 19 have such a narrow opinion of others.

Perhaps you should re-list your ad saying something like, "Gamers wanted. Must be clean cut college or college want a be, ages 16-21 (and only 21 so we can have someone to buy beer). No weirdos and must be male."

I'm not flaming you, I just don't get it, truely. I could see a lot of problems from letting either in your group but I tend to focus more on what they can offer to the group rather than the potential problems that might arise. A 40 year old gamer, great, let's get him in and pick his brain. Unless he is new to the sport he must have great ideas and experiences. Bring him in for a game or two and tell him it is a probation peroid. If he turns out to be truely weird tell him that it is just not working out but don't put an ad out there asking for gamers and then getting mad that gamers respond.

As for the girl, well, girls are usually rare in the field so I always encourage them in the game and they usually keep the game more on focus rather than, "I roll to see if I am drunk yet." Although, sometimes it doesn't matter and people will try to get drunk in D&D no matter what you do. :) ;) :cool:
 

DM-Rocco said:
I think I have a problem with your posts...
Umm, DM-Rocco, I think you meant to post in the thread entitled "40 year old man wants to join my game" and posted here. Nyaricus (the poster who began that thread) and Arrgh! Mark! are not the same person, or at least I'm fairly sure that they aren't.
 

shilsen said:
Umm, DM-Rocco, I think you meant to post in the thread entitled "40 year old man wants to join my game" and posted here. Nyaricus (the poster who began that thread) and Arrgh! Mark! are not the same person, or at least I'm fairly sure that they aren't.
Oops, I guess I could have made a mistake. I guess I assumed since the guy in the 40 year old thread mentioned his 14 year old girl thread that they were one in the same. I mean really, how many 14 yeard old girl threads are there anyway. Hmm, I mean on ENWorld that is :D :p :lol:
 

Okay, I get it now.

Arrgh! Mark! started this thread but Nyaricus used a simular title with a link to this thread and grammer that is not very clear that he didn't write both.

Okay, either way, the premise is the same. Judge not unless you be judged. Just ignore the personal stuff about him being 19 and it should still apply in principil. :) ;) :cool:

I say let her in on a probation adventure and see what happens. She might like it and you might enjoy the different perspective.

Sorry for the confusion on my part.

Good catch shilsen :) ;) :cool:
 

Thurbane said:
Put it this way...sometime in the future, imagine that either the girl or her parents have a falling out with the DM or another member of the group, and go to the press with false accusations.

Do you not permit women in your group? One women among a group of men is opening yourself up to the same sort of false accusations.
 

Personally, I can understand the confusion. After all, I'm kind of amused that in this thread, a lot of people are creeped out/paranoid/horrified at the idea of an adult wanting to game with a teenager... but in the other thread, everyone thinks it's OK.

Peace & Luv, Liz
 

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