AAAGGHHH!!! Not AGAIN!!!

[billd91]

Um, No. REAL love is accepting your partner for who he or she is.

Well, yes and no. I'd say that anyone who refuses to make any compromises with the people they supposedly love are just as bad. While I do believe you have to accept your partner who who he or she is, you also have to make allowances for them in your own lives and be able to expect them to do the same. That might mean curtailing the budget (both money and time) on some hobby passtimes for mutual activities.
So an occasional wine tasting party that keeps you from gaming would be an acceptible cost to pay once in a while for marital bliss. Putting up with a hostile attitude about a hobby is, I think, over the line and your friend should put his foot down and let her know that he has no intention of giving up his hobby on any permanent basis.
Once kids arrive (and I don't think I'd be too keen on raising kids with a partner that uncompromising about who I was), that may put the kibbosh on gaming for several months. Babies, especially first babies, take a lot of time out of the schedule. But that kind of time commitment isn't a permanent thing. Parents/spouses should make time for each other so that the other one can have a night off every once in a while (weekly if it can be managed). Any spouse who won't allow that has a serious attitude problem.

 

[Henry]

Well, yes and no. I'd say that anyone who refuses to make any compromises with the people they supposedly love are just as bad....Once kids arrive (and I don't think I'd be too keen on raising kids with a partner that uncompromising about who I was), that may put the kibbosh on gaming for several months. Babies, especially first babies, take a lot of time out of the schedule. But that kind of time commitment isn't a permanent thing. Parents/spouses should make time for each other so that the other one can have a night off every once in a while (weekly if it can be managed). Any spouse who won't allow that has a serious attitude problem.

I totally agree with compromise and commitment, but someone who says, "after this, the gaming is OVER" and who shows open disdain doesn't sound like they're talking about a temporary thing. On the other hand, we can only know half the story (just as the spouse could be uncopromising, the man could be ignoring everything BUT gaming), so it's not right to say, "she's wrong" or "he's wrong."

As for Djeta's remarks, I can agree in principle. You go, girl!

 

[werk]

It is stuff like this that makes me glad my wife is a gamer. It always baffles me why people don't find compatible mates that can allow each other some freedom .

I heard that. My wife has never gamed, and doesn't want to, but she schedules around my bi-weekly game, even allowing our home to be overrun with loud cheeto fingered gamers. She gives me a little grief when I drop some cash on books, but I just mention her subscription to entertainment weekly and the subject gets dropped.

Even with those favorable conditions we still have a hard time getting everyone together when we are supposed to be there. Especially in the summer, what with weddings and all that crap. I mean, come on, this is D&D, it's important stuff!

 

[DungeonmasterCal]

Dang...I started an actual thread here!

Thanks for the comments, everyone. I have plenty of replies for folks, but they'll have to wait until I get back from a funeral this aftenoon.

 

[JoeBlank]

I found a way around that by DMing my son and the son of another group member on Saturdays....then On Sundays, the adult game, all the kids go play in the basement for 4 hours!

While children can be a "burden" sometimes, I think it is important to include them in activities that you enjoy. Besides, gives me a chance to play twice a week now!

I've planted the seeds for this myself, but my sons are just too young at this point. The oldest, almost 7, likes the minis game, and we have run a few sessions using the basic DnD game, but we are no where near a regular campaign yet. The other two kids are 4 and almost 2, so we still have ways to go. I do foresee a future where I have regular game sessions with my sons and their friends.

My wife is pretty understanding, but game sessions I miss due to family life are my chioce, not because of something she dictates to me. This hobby could easily consume my life, if I let it, but I don't want that. I've always said "moderation in all things" is a good mottto, don't let any one thing run your life.

Djeta and Mojo, glad to see you guys are still around. We just got back from Disney World last week and had the time of our lives, as usual. Can't wait to go again!

 

[MojoGM]

Djeta and Mojo, glad to see you guys are still around. We just got back from Disney World last week and had the time of our lives, as usual. Can't wait to go again!

Thanks! I still lurk on here just about every day, I just rarely have anything worth posting.

But I'll always be lurking about...

We try to do DW at least 2 times a year, to make our annual passes worthwhile. Though next year I'd like to see Disneyland in CA again, it's been years (almost 20 I think)

 

[Patman21967]

To which my reply would be "Then it's a good thing I have no intention of hving children with you, oh, and don't let the door hit your behind on the way out.

It baffles me why anyone would put up with this. It has nothing to do with gaming, it has to do with being someone who does not respect you enough to let you enjoy the hobbies of your choosing.

People are strange...

I had to give a girlfriend the boot, because she decided to insult the guys I game with every sunday, and have since 1987. I also am in a strat-o-matic baseball league, which takes up all of 3 hours a week, and she had to bust my balls about that too..She would not try to share any of my hobbies, but I was supposed to do whatever she wanted....hah...not this guy....I told her to piss off....too bad, she was pretty good looking...

 

[Queen_Dopplepopolis]

There are some things I can see a woman demanding her man give up if they have children... smoking, drinking, high speed chases... but gaming? I say poo-poo to that.

*shakes her head*

Gaming is a hobby that - when done in moderation - hurts no one and no thing. I can't imagine being such an insensitive person as to demand that my husband give up a hobby that does not effect me.

One of my friends is married to the "game hater" woman type. She gets to go shopping while he games. Just need a compromise.

 

[Hijinks]

Why is it ok for this man's wife to force him to do someting he doesn't want to do (i.e. the wine tasting) because SHE likes it, but he's not allowed to do what HE likes?

Women can be so evil. If I wasn't one, I'd hate them all :þ

Seriously. If a man wants to be a.) married happily and b.) a gamer, he's much better off marrying a gamer. Now if only the men didn't want a gamer woman who looks like Jessica Alba too and were instead satisfied with an average gal ....

 

[F.C.Desoya]

Seriously. If a man wants to be a.) married happily and b.) a gamer, he's much better off marrying a gamer. Now if only the men didn't want a gamer woman who looks like Jessica Alba too and were instead satisfied with an average gal ....

Hey I married an average girl (a 10 in my eyes!) and turned her into a gamer! Now I admit she does not share my passion for the game. Not only does she tolerates it, but plays as well.