Do you wander much from table to table?
I mean, not to derail the discussion, but I'm curious why this is a selling point. Surely the only table that matters where you game, right? If I have house rules at my table, how is that a bad thing for you?
First off, your home game doesn't matter with regards to my point. The only things that matter are the game assumptions that are brought to each individual table, whether they are at home, pick-up games/game days, or conventions. If we gamed together on a regular basis, then I would expect that we would be on the same page concerning house rules. For instance, say one of your house rules was removing healing surges. For me to play I would have to accept that or find another group. Simple as that. Those assumptions are the only effect of house rules that matter.
So you know where I am coming from, my experience with 4e is limited. I played in a 2 month run through KOTS with a DM that I suspect would be a good DM in any system. I also played in 2 game days and one session of a pick up game. I also played three or so rounds with DDM. Concerning 4e, for three different DM I noticed varying styles that did not seem to surface much through the game; meaning I had the same experience playing the game regardless of the DM. Same with DDM. I had experiences that I could rely on that lead me to believe the game would remain consistent whenever I wanted to play 4e.
The major caveat is that these were all public venues using pre-prepared modules and scenarios, so I am aware that my experience may not match yours, other's, or those that play exclusively at home.
But my point is that I think 4e plays in similar manner regardless of the DM's personal style. That is awesome for those that like the game. It makes it something consistent within itself and without regard to differences in DMs or players for that matter.
So back to my example earlier concerning removing healing surges as a house rule. That is a massive rule change that would make a core rule game far different from a house rule game. That rule may work for your group for the style you want to play, but it makes it far more difficult for a player that relies on that assumption to integrate back into a core rule game. Think of how using spell points instead of prepared spell slots from 3e Unearthed Arcana would change game play.
This leads back to what happened with 1e, 2e, and 3e. I think WOTC understands this by making a rule assumption that all rules are core.
As for it being a selling-point, I can only use analogies. My base assumption is that D&D4e is the brand leader in our industry. Think of Coke or Pepsi, they are the soft-drink brand leaders and are consistent regardless of where you go: California, Massachusetts, Texas, or Virginia, you can count on them to be the same. Call of Cthulhu is another example that is within our own industry. Regardless of edition the game is the same. WOW is a great example of this as well. Everybody is playing the same game and drinking the same soda that they are accustomed to.
I believe they have strengthen the brand, because they can advertise what the game is and what to expect. Not so with any of the earlier editions. Pre-3e rules sets were billed as toolboxes. There are too many examples of these games where the addition of house rules and options allowed the DM and players to create the game they wanted, and those would barely resemble the same rule set found at other tables.
I could tell you a story about a younger player I had in a 3e game that had wanted to play an Elven Bladesinger. I wouldn't let him use the version that allowed full spell progression, but I allowed him to choose the version that offered something like four spell-levels of advancement that I would have played in heartbeat. He had a great concept and it was a great class (maybe prestige I cannot remember), but he was playing from a different set of rules assumptions than I was. I was the DM. He continued to play but created another character instead. In my opinion 4e has removed that headache by their assumption that every rule they release is core--implying balanced and fun for play. That to me is a great selling point.
What happens at your table is yours and your player's business, and not for me or anyone else to judge. But don't come to my table expecting some grand house rule that you are used to, that you read in 4e Unearthed Arcana be added to my game. And same in converse, don't expect me to join your table if you have a house rule that runs counter to all of my experience from the core rules.
Hope I have made my original point more clear. This is one of the longest posts I have written (I hate long posts), but hope I have presented my case in a manner in which, while you may not agree, you can see where I am coming from.
