Can't game at your own house?

[Tewligan]

But what he wants is to watch tv and eat dinner. He can do that in his room...I do that in my room all the time. He just doesn't want to. I have no problems wanting to relax when his friends are over and I just eat and watch tv in my room. It's no big deal...but it is for him for some reason. That's my problem with it.

Yeah, I think I'm actually still with your roomie on this one, I'm afraid. I guess it's hard to explain if you don't get where he's coming from - personally, I'd like to have the option of hanging either in my room or in the living room, even if I end up just being in my room. Having the living room commandeered that often for such a long time would just seem like I was being FORCED to stay in my room, and that would probably grate at my pride a bit. He's just more territorial than you, it seems. If it genuinely bothers him, then I think the considerate thing to do is to accomodate him.

 

[Tewligan]

Let him have his way, then, while he and his friends are happily chugging beer and hanging out, pull the same crap he does. Ask him if they can quit at 5:00 so you can watch tv. If that doesn't work, just stomp his ass. Problem solved. Don't let him push you around, either physically or emotionally.

I think this stops being a realistic problem solver after tenth grade or so.

 

[farscapesg1]

Yeah, I think I'm actually still with your roomie on this one, I'm afraid. I guess it's hard to explain if you don't get where he's coming from - personally, I'd like to have the option of hanging either in my room or in the living room, even if I end up just being in my room. Having the living room commandeered that often for such a long time would just seem like I was being FORCED to stay in my room, and that would probably grate at my pride a bit. He's just more territorial than you, it seems. If it genuinely bothers him, then I think the considerate thing to do is to accomodate him.

Yeah, that's the way to solve problems. Just give in :\

I still stand by my idea that the best thing is to sit down and work out a solution that works with both of you. Call the game a little early and start gaming earlier instead of spending a couple hours ordering food, eating, yacking, etc. Do your chatting after the game instead of before, when the roommate can come out and hang with you and your friends in the living room. But, don't just give in to make him happy.

 

[Elephant]

Yeah I agree. The problem though is that if he has friends over drinking, I have the choice to hang out with them and drink. He doesn't really have a choice to hang out with us because he has no interest in playing or watching.

Ahem. It isn't that he doesn't have a choice about whether to hang out with you and your friends; he's MADE his choice to not hang out.

 

[Eternal Knot Games]

I would say call off the game session for the next meeting and work out a compromise between the two of ya for the next (and following) session(s), that and get your gf out of the appartment before the next session.

Also, if you do an evening meal with the gaming group, invite him in and share it with him.

 

[FATDRAGONGAMES]

Have you checked your local library? Back when we didn't have a place to play we used the local libraries 'multi-purpose' room. It was free, came with folding tables/chairs etc. The main library in your system (larger cities) usually stay open late on weekends until 9pm.

 

[Tewligan]

Ahem. It isn't that he doesn't have a choice about whether to hang out with you and your friends; he's MADE his choice to not hang out.

Well, not really. What's he going to do with the group? They're in the middle of a game - they probably don't want him talking to them and being a distraction during the game any more than he wants to be there.

I find it odd that more people don't see this from the other guy's point of view. Really, this is like having an all-day party every couple of weeks that the other guy isn't invited to. Judging from what the OP says, he sounds like a pretty agreeable person on everything else. He pays 1/2 rent in a 3-person house (I know, it was mentioned that his girlfriend often stays the night - that ain't the same as full-on living there). If he's that adamant about this, and he's that nice about everything else, maybe there's something the OP doesn't know or that we aren't being told that is pushing this guy's buttons. Your players aren't rude or obnoxious, are they?

 

[Arnwyn]

I find it odd that more people don't see this from the other guy's point of view.

Oh, I see it - I just don't necessarily agree with it. (Based on the information we've been given, of course.)

I can see the other guy's point of view, for sure - but it lost a lot of credibility with me when he has his drinking buddies over "Friday/Saturday nights drinking, being loud, and hogging the living room" (though we don't know the monthly frequency of this).

 

[Old Fezziwig]

If he's that adamant about this, and he's that nice about everything else, maybe there's something the OP doesn't know or that we aren't being told that is pushing this guy's buttons. Your players aren't rude or obnoxious, are they?

I think these are a fair assumption and question to make, especially if the roomie's really that cool about the temporary live-in g/f.

 

[Oryan77]

Your players aren't rude or obnoxious, are they?

No not at all. My players are extremely cool people. My roommate made the comment about not wanting to "walk on eggshells" when he's home & we're playing, but he wouldn't explain that. My group was more worried about us making him uncomfortable than caring about him being in our way. Him watching us, talking to us, fixing dinner & banging around in the kitchen was never something that he would need to care about & walk on eggshells to avoid doing. I was concerned with that remark because he shouldn't feel like he's bothering us at all...we're the ones that are worried about bothering him. He may have said that out of context because it didn't make sense.

(though we don't know the monthly frequency of this).

The first 2 years of us living together, his friends were over at least 2-3 weekend nights a month. This past year he hasn't had anyone over hardly at all mainly because he spends his time with his gf now. I still wouldn't care if his friends came over every weekend (unless I'm gaming of course )...I would just go to my room if I didn't want to be around them. I don't see why that's a big deal...I guess my roommates room is boring