Can't game at your own house?

[Oryan77]

Assuming a 30 day month and 24 hours a day, have you considered refunding him 18/720th s of his share of the rent? That buys off the time he feels deprived of... Just another option to throw out there, and it's still probably cheaper than a hotel.

HAHA, as funny as that sounds, it's not a bad suggestion. Everyone knows money talks
Knowing this guy though, he would say it's not about the money...he wouldn't lower his pride by accepting a bribe

 

[DamionW]

Well if he tells you its not about the money, that turns a lot of his arguments on their ear.

"I pay rent here, and I'm entitled to this space!"

"I thought this wasn't about the money..."

"ummmmm...."

 

[Infiniti2000]

All roomates are bad roomates, IMO, it just takes time for them to turn bad.

Being a roomate is a process of compromise and it seems like the ability of your roomate to compromise has expired. I understand your point about wanting to avoid the childishness of him trying to interrupt the game. I can foresee an pre-argument to the effect of "We're gaming anyways, so you just have to deal with it." This would be followed by him turning on the TV at 5PM, really loudly, and starting a fight. I'd suggest you avoid this if you think it's at all possible. In fact, if you really do think it's at all possible, I suggest you plan on moving out or getting a new roomate or something. People change, and this guy has changed for the worse. It's not likely to get better. Chances are that he really doesn't like to relinquish the living room and has been dealing with it in the past, he mentioned it to one of his drinking buddies (never good people, btw), and got pressured by his drinking buddies "not to put up with it." Am I right?

Anyway, your GF issue has a lot of impact. Don't underestimate the awkwardness of it. Your roomate undoubtedly feels very weird about it and probably doesn't appreciate it in the slightest - regardless of whether she pays rent or not. If notifying her parents is a bad thing, avoid the chance -- remote as it may be -- that your roomate will call them, "Hey, guess what Oryan77 is doing..."

So, the final advice is to find somewhere else to play. I'm 100% sure that this is the best option has the repercussions on pushing your roomate are not worth the risk. Options for gaming:

Friend's place - You seem to have exercised all these options. But, maybe a new player ...?

Library - Never tried it myself. If not the school library, how about the public library?

Hotel - This is, quite honestly, brilliant. It's not cheap -- I mean, it would be $45 you wouldn't otherwise spend -- but there are a lot of benefits. Maybe the whole group can take a break to swim in the pool. Etc.

Paying the roomate - Although seemingly brilliant, I don't like it. It still carries all the risks from above unless you get something in writing -- and that would look bad.

Restaurant - Perhaps a restaurant, coffee shop, or something? I'm not sure what choices you might have available in that regard. As long as you keep ordering, they might not have a problem, but Saturdays are probably busy.

Work - Can you use a conference room at work perhaps? I knew some people who did this. It was particularly nice because of the free work-beverages and overhead LCD projectors and networked computers (a little fragging break never hurts).

FLGS - Our FLGS would allow it, for a small fee of around $10 I think. Dunno for sure, since it's been soooo long since I checked.

Bookstore - Some bookstores like Barnes and Noble have big tables. That might work. Might not.

Outside - On a nice day, you could always do it outside in the park or something.

 

[atom crash]

If I were in your shoes, I'd find another place to play this once. There's no sense in creating more tension and bad blood with someone you live with.

Have you considered that your roommate may be frustrated with the fact that your girlfriend is temporarily living with you? He might feel like she is taking over too much of your apartment (she's part of the gaming group, right?) and may be lashing out now against the whole group (of which she is a part) because he doesn't feel comfortable confronting you about the girlfriend.

So rent a hotel room for the night. Or find a room at the local library. Then talk to the roommate and find a solution for the next time this comes up. I'd even go so far as to insist you book gatherings (your gaming group or his drinking friends) a week in advance and make it solid with no cancellations its set.

And start looking now for a place for your gf to move into. If it's not a problem now, trust me it will be before too long.

 

[Eonthar]

We have rented a hotel room before - and it worked great.

We were six players, no one had a place big enough, and four of us were from out of town. So, we rented a small suite, that had a large dining-room / conference table, and everyone was happy. As an added bonus the room even had a mini-kitchen with a full-sized fridge to keep the drinks cold, and store left-over pizza.

That being said, it did cost us more than $10 each though. It was also a one-time shot, so YMMV.

 

[Lonely Tylenol]

The next time he has friends over tell him you don't feel like drinking and want to watch something really boring on tv. Complaign that they are being to loud or just turn up the tv to drown them out . If he can't take a hint or confronts you, just throw his own arguments back at him.

I disagree. Don't be passive-agressive. Either put your foot down or work out a compromise. Don't let the situation slide if it's unacceptable, and don't try to turn his own crap against him because it won't work and it'll make the situation worse.

Never expect that a jerk is going to take a hint, nor expect that a jerk will agree with his own arguments when they come out of someone else's mouth.

It's your living space too. I assume you're paying equal shares of the rent. If I were you I wouldn't let him get away with trying to make a dominance play in the living space, which is what this is. He wants to be more important than you, and he needs to learn a bit of humility and consideration.

Your best bet for a peaceable resolution is to work out a schedule in advance that he has agreed to. If he agrees, and then tries to change his story later, you can ignore his complaints with a clear conscience.

 

[Agback]

I work at Stanford University, maybe I can ask around about a place.

Back when I was a campus habitué, my various universities used to let staff members and campus clubs book tutorial rooms for use outside class hours. But I guess these days security concerns have put a stop to that.

Go and see whatever section in the administration is responsible for locking up, opening, and cleaning. They ought to be able to point you in the right direction.

 

[Infiniti2000]

It's your living space too. I assume you're paying equal shares of the rent. If I were you I wouldn't let him get away with trying to make a dominance play in the living space, which is what this is. He wants to be more important than you, and he needs to learn a bit of humility and consideration.

That sounds great in theory, but don't expect him to be rational and learn anything at all. I suspect that any attempts at working out a suitable compromise will only escalate the feud. If the roomate really does want to be more important than you, then that merely shows that he will not compromise.

 

[Nellisir]

One important question -- who's on the lease? If he's primary, then...ask him for a refund on the times you're not allowed to use the common areas. If you're primary, he can suck it up, for reasons everyone has given below. If you're both equal, then you both have the right to use the common areas, and the right to have friends over. You should establish a public and FIXED schedule also negotiated between the two of you.

(another leverage point -- can he afford the apartment alone? How quickly can he get another roommate? If I were in that situation, I'd be looking for a new place. And another -- whose tv is in the living room? No tv in the living room, no roommate.)

Cheers
Nell.

 

[Agback]

There's no sense in creating more tension and bad blood with someone you live with.

Hear! Hear!

Relatiating would be a really good way to make your apartment unliveable for both of you.

Have you considered that your roommate may be frustrated with the fact that your girlfriend is temporarily living with you?

He's coping with it badly if he is. But that isn't really the point. This poor fellow has had a third resident whose presence he never bargained on introduced to his apartment. His roommate and the interloper aren't giving him the cold shoulder or anything, but there is no avoid the elephant in the room, which is that they are much more into one another than they are into him, and he is being made to feel like an outsider in his own home.

You are already making a big ask in having your girlfriend stay. Your flatmate is being a pretty good sport in allowing it at all, and if the situation has lasted longer than about two weeks I reckon that you and your girlfriend are imposing on his good nature. Even though you are paying two-thirds of the rent and utilities you are making his home socially uncomfortable for him. Your girlfriend should move out without delay.

This option is not on your poll, but I suggest that you suspend you game for a while, and put an extra 18 hours a month into finding your girlfriend a new place to live.