STARP_JVP
First Post
We all know the truth. The "myth" that D&D was invented in the 1970s by some "Gary Gygax" bloke is just a story, propaganda designed to further the goals of the gaming companies. D&D has existed, as we all know, from the beginning of time itself. I would like us all to share our favourite examples of gaming throughout 10,000 years of human history. Here are some of my favourites:
- 44 BC, Rome: Julius Caesar is running his campaign, in which Brutus is a player. Brutus informs Caesar that on his initiative turn, he will 'backstab'. Unfortunately, he demonstrates this a bit too figuratively.
- 1776, Philadelphia: DM Thomas Jefferson gets his papers mixed up. Fortunately, this is remedied in time, otherwise the modern US Constitution might begin: "This room is 60 ft x 60 ft and contains three chests and a bugbear..."
- 1812: The British loot and pillage Washington, burning the White House, all because President Madison refused to allow the British to import characters into his campaign from another one.
- 1861: The American Civil War begins as a schism erupts between the pro 3rd-Edition North and the South, who prefer the old 2nd Edition rules.
- 1888: Jack the Ripper terrorises London. The only clue to his identity is a battered piece of paper, describing the Ripper as a "20th-level Rogue".
- 1939: Hitler is so annoyed when his character in Himmler's campaign dies, that he invades Poland.
- 1945: World War Two ends with the dropping of atomic bombs on Japan. A slightly over-zealous Air Force general describes it as "Power Word Nuke".
- 1963: John F. Kennedy is shot dead after Lee Harvey Oswald is kicked out of his campaign for "being a rules lawyer".
- 1979: Held hostage for over a year, US embassy officials in Iran take to playing D&D. When finally released, they speak about their dreadful ordeal. "Nobody had any of the supplements! We had to play with the core rulebooks!" sobs one traumatised hostage.
- 2002: While searching the Tora Bora mountains in Afghanistan, US and allied troops find Al-Qaeda documents, computer files, and Osama bin Laden's D&D sheet. Apparently bin Laden plays a gnome wizard. Go figure.
