does a nice, shy, meek guy have a chance in hell?

[Spell]

Aaron, himself, states that he knows that his lack of self-confidence is his single biggest problem in dealing with women; he wants to gain it.

well, then i second the motion of finding a voluntary/ charity job. working close to other people, helping them, works wonder on morale. you actualy stop feeling alone. that is the beginning of the end of the depression.

 

[Spell]

A car full of girls drive past me, yell "get a life" and throw a condom out the window at me.

before saying anything, let me clarify that i am reasonably confident in myself.
i had something similar happening to me, the other day, as i was walking to a concert.
guess what? just as there are male idiots, so there are girls. why giving them the chance of raining on your parade?
if this happens another time, i urge you to pick up the condom (assuming it's not used! yuck!)... they cost a fortune!

someone threw a full plasic cup of soda pop at me from moving van. i got soaked, and it was pretty cold out

are you sure they did that maliciously? could it just happened?

id move away like my brother did (he moved to pittsburgh, dont hear from him much anymore.

as much as i don't believe in in-born strong family ties, he is still your brother. call him. have a chat. do ask for his opinion. does he know that you are feeling that bad?

but i quite frankly couldnt survive without my mother. i cant remember doctors appointments, when to take my medicine, and i certainly cant make my own appointments.

you surely can't if somebody else does that for you. a friend of mine couldn't cook ANYTHING until he was forced to move out. he ate horrible home made food for a month or so, and then he started to get better. now he is acceptable.
same with appointments, medicines, and stuff. if you keep a diary for the appointments (not sure it's called a diary in english... sorry!) and have alarms for your medicine, you are well capable to do it. i can't believe you learned something as complex as a role playing game system and can't find your way to remembering these things.

 

[Ralts Bloodthorne]

Aww, drinking wont be hard to stop. I've had about as much beer as I can stomach for at least a month. I really dont drink very much usually, honest. And I dont think there is a cheaper place to live than wear I am now

and dont worry about me not trustin doctors. I'd be in a wheelchair with paralyzed legs right now if it werent for doctors, so I tend to trust them usually. Plus they give me pills to let me pee.



Peeing is a good thing Ive learned. Not being able to pee is not so good.

YO!

AARON!

Gonna answer my questions, or what?

 

[Aaron L]

Youd be suprised at what you can forget. It took me forever to remember to take my bethanecol for my bladder, and when I dont I have a hard time peeing. I still forget sometimes!

Actually making phone calls for appointmenst is the hard thing. I have a bad time speaking to people on the phone. I have a worse time speaking to them in person, but in cases like that Im usually just thrust into the situation and dont have a choice.

 

[nerfherder]

Actually making phone calls for appointmenst is the hard thing. I have a bad time speaking to people on the phone. I have a worse time speaking to them in person, but in cases like that Im usually just thrust into the situation and dont have a choice.

For some reason, I occasionally find phoning some people difficult, and end up getting tongue-tied and embarrased - and I'm normally a fairly confident guy. What I do is jot down a few bullet points about what I want to talk about, so that I can see them in front of me as I talk, and I can tick each point off to make sure everything's covered.

e.g. when I arrange to get my car serviced, I'll jot down these things on a post-it note and stick it on the desk by the phone. The numbers and registration are there because I tend to forget things like that if I get flustered:
*) Garage phone number
*) My mobile number as a contact
*) My car's registration
*) My car's mileage
*) Ask how much
*) Ask for courtesy car

I also have a bad memory, so I had to develop a coping mechanism for that. First, I bought a PDA. Then I put all my address and diary entries into Outlook on my work PC. I setup the docking station on my PC and synchronised the two. Every work day, I put the PDA into its docking station and I record all appointments on my PC. My PDA comes home with me every night.

Cheers,
Liam

 

[Spell]

Sorry you don't trust doctors, but I think telling him to forget doctors is a bad move.

he said he has been seeing doctors forever. i t doesn't look like any of them managed to change the situation. now, if we all agree the problem is the lack of confidence, then no doctor in the world can do much for him. he has to get involved into something, find a way to realise that he is a valuable member of the society, too.
with all the advices that are in this tread alone, he could manage to find his way.

i honestly don't see how seeing a specialist would help him further. advice given by a person paid to do that job might be much better than those given on a web forum, or by friend(s)... but the latters are much more valuable for him. for the simple reason, i believe, that the sheer volume of the post in this tread could make him understand that his personality is not bad, after all, nor repulsive. that people is willing to give help, when he asks. and for free, most of the time.

 

[Spell]

Of course not! I like positions where my wife's on top, actually. It's a perfectly acceptible substitute if you have problems of any kind on top.

funnily enough, i might be "back on saddle" soon... hopefully the new year will bring many nice things to papa...

 

[Spell]

and dont worry about me not trustin doctors. I'd be in a wheelchair with paralyzed legs right now if it werent for doctors, so I tend to trust them usually. Plus they give me pills to let me pee.

i can honestly say: good for you.
i had the opposite experience. i had a little problem with one of my knee, when to a very expensive and (supposedly) good specialist, and he nearly killed my knee for good, while "checking it out". i couldn't walk without limping for a week. for *months* i couldn't walk without feeling the pain.
now, hopefully, the tendon is almost healed, and, while sometimes it does hurt, it is happening less and less and less. i am confident it will go away, eventually.

according to the suggestion of the "genius" who visited me, my knee was already damaged that severely, and there was no way to ease the pain without having a surgery. (my stubborness to say "no" despite what my parents and some of my friends said, i believe, saved me a lot of money, and the use of the leg...)

and this is the last episode of a long serie...
i generally resort to doctors only in very very very serious cases.
call it bad luck if you wish, but i've learnt to trust my guts feelings more than any laureate doctor...

as you can see, different people have different problems.

 

[Spell]

For some reason, I occasionally find phoning some people difficult, and end up getting tongue-tied and embarrased - and I'm normally a fairly confident guy. What I do is jot down a few bullet points about what I want to talk about, so that I can see them in front of me as I talk, and I can tick each point off to make sure everything's covered.

this technique rules. i hate phones as well, and i always do that. it saves time, you come across as efficient and professional, and the bad feelings are gone (at least for that phone call... )

 

[cattoy]

This thread reminds me of Densha Otoko.