On a ephemeral high from the patrons' sudden interest in Nave and his story, his bigheadedness becomes even more so gigantic. "Barkeep! Fetch me another drink so I can sip while I speak."
"In the beginning, there was a small, cute, darling baby called Nave. I was born into a priestly line in the Imperium, so clerical work was to be my duty, and I must say that I am a very powerful and all-reaching holyman now..." He smiles to himself before cutting off his tangent.
"Anyways, I grew up in the temples, a good little boy, the best of the temple-children at both learning prayers and divination alike. I was so far ahead in my training that I-" Looking around, Nave realizes his audience is losing interest and they don't seem the slightest bit interested anymore.
"Well, let's skip to a part a bit more tasteful," he says with a scowl, his pride a bit injured from the disinterest (But don't worry, there is plenty more pride where that came from) "So... One day, I was shuffling over to my teacher's palace to deliver a parchel to him when I broke in- err... stumbled upon the ancient, powerful portals that the Imperium keeps. I stepped through one, half-accident, half-intentionally, my heroic side that thirsts for adventure and exploring, clashing with my conscious, which was telling me to keep away from them." Feeling that the audience was much more enthralled by this story, he smiles comfortably and continues.
"I ended up on a deserted tropical island somewhere in the Shifting Seas... And there I found myself, a holy warrior, a man of the gods, deserted... left to die."
"But! Die did I not. For a week I stayed on that island, living off whatever I could. The first few days were rough indeed. No ordinary man could have survived such a feat. As I laid there the first couple days, no water, no food, I prayed to Zagreus, my god. I prayed and prayed, until he answered me."
"As I lay there in agony, fading away from this realm, I saw a large, chubby bird with a fat breast and wide wings fly out to the shoreline from the jungle. I aimed my holy spells that I had been trained to use for emergencies, whispered a glorious prayer to Zagreus, and then thrust a bolt toward the bird." With a magnificent gesture, Nave visually shows the action of his spell-casting, by gallantly waving his arms around and mock-throwing a bolt of holy power toward the far wall of the tavern.
"The bird proved to be quite a meal for me, for over a few days... Such juicy, tender meat it was..." Not noticing himself drool, he catches the drip after a few of the patrons snicker.
After a few more days of painful sunburn and thirst, a boat came by. I signalled to it, and luckily, it came by to get me."
"I spent almost a month on that terrible vessel... It was a merchant ship, and the men only cared about gold. Such avarice... I never have seen greed so great in men before. The men aboard, they had no gods. They hit me when I tried to make jokes, hit me when I tried to pray, hit me when I yakked on the deck from the sea-sickness... It was a terrible journey indeed. Of course, I am not permitted by my god to fight mortals, because I am a pacifist. Yeah... that's why I didn't hit them back!" He says the last part with more intent to convince himself than to tell his tale.
Looking at his glass, empty after sipping it throughout his story, he finds it a good time to finish up. "Ah, so long story short, I made it here via that vessel, and that's where I am now. Barkeep, another drink, my friend."
