Gay men or women who play D&D

[Dragonbait]

I've had several gay players in my games. They all played d20 games, mostly D&D.

I have a couple players that I think are bisexual in my current group, but I don't think that's within the scope of this thread.

 

[Drub]

That's too bad

One of the groups I was in disbanded with the infamous, "It's not me that's weird, it's you!" speech, when the sole (supposedly) heterosexual player went on a seemingly unprompted rant about how no one should make her feel weird for being straight and monogamous, and everyone was all like, "Really, G., it's cool, no one judges, but it seriously isn't cool that you just told everyone they're weird."

Yeah... that was our second to last session as a group.

This is exactly the kind of situation I want to avoid: weird negativity during something that should be fun and everyone's playing and being social and making new friends. Besides all that, I'd be inviting people into my own home. The last thing I want to do is give somebody an invite only to find out they are uncomfortable, disagreeable, or potentially unstable when all I want to do is have fun. IMHO, Nipping that stuff in the bud right off the bat is the best way to not even having to deal with that crapola. If I wanted to feel bad about something, I'd watch the news or hit myself in the face with a hammer.

 

[Dice4Hire]

More thread necromancy. And again, it is a winner of a potentially controversial topic.

My thoughts on this topic are none at all. I cannot see how being gay, straight or whatever variation thereof makes a bit of difference in an RPG. Any problems are what the players or DM themselves bring to the table.

 

[SoulsFury]

It is interesting this thread got brought back up. I saw it tonight and something seemed familiar about it. Then I realized I remember seeing it back in the day. I was 18 in '02 and was like 'gays are real?' Now at 27, I have gamed with several gays, have been to the local gay club and have several gay friends. I don't think sexual preference changes the game in any way. I think being comfortable with your gaming group is all that matters. It is always awkward for me to game with new people, gay or straight, for several sessions. To me, gaming is something done among friends, not something done amongst strangers. That's just me though.

 

[Miar]

I just popped through and noticed this thread and thought I'd throw in a quick link. There is a blog over on boardgamegeek about being a gay gamer that might be of interest. It's at The Bored Gaymer | BoardGameGeek

He talks about rpgs as well as board games.

 

[AGamerInTheCloset]

(( I'm posting this post on an alias. And I apologize to the site administrators for doing so, my reasons however should be both clear and obvious by the name I choose for the alias. ))

I'm a gamer, and I am a homosexual male. I also happen to live in the bible belt of America where neither is appreciated and I have been warned of 'going to Hell' for both of these things. Unfortunately it is also not physically safe for me to be open about my sexuality where I live.

Bashing happens, I've seen them, and the lack of response or care they receive where I live.

I am extremely open about my gaming hobby. I'm rather proud of it! I go to all the cons and I'm actually a semi public individual in the gaming industry. Definitely not an 'A' lister, heck I'm lucky if I'm a 'C' lister. ( I know it is unlikely that anyone would recognize who I am from what I've told / tell you in this post, but please, I ask those individuals who may to not post guessing my identity. )

I probably even self identify more as a gamer than I do as a homosexual. Gaming is what I choose to do, after all. The fact that it is also the aspect of my life I do not have to hide probably contributes to it quite a bit.

I don't think I will ever come out to my gaming friends simply because they are my oldest friends. I've known most of them for the better part of a decade and a half. And they know me as the nice guy GM who's a little awkward. I don't really want to risk loosing my game group simply for being 'out.'

But then again, I'm not 'out' at all. I lack the courage to be an open homosexual, and I respect those that have it.

 

[steeldragons]

(( I'm posting this post on an alias. And I apologize to the site administrators for doing so, my reasons however should be both clear and obvious by the name I choose for the alias. ))

I'm a gamer, and I am a homosexual male. I also happen to live in the bible belt of America where neither is appreciated and I have been warned of 'going to Hell' for both of these things. Unfortunately it is also not physically safe for me to be open about my sexuality where I live.

Bashing happens, I've seen them, and the lack of response or care they receive where I live.

-snip-

I don't think I will ever come out to my gaming friends simply because they are my oldest friends. I've known most of them for the better part of a decade and a half. And they know me as the nice guy GM who's a little awkward. I don't really want to risk loosing my game group simply for being 'out.'

But then again, I'm not 'out' at all. I lack the courage to be an open homosexual, and I respect those that have it.

First, I highly recommend moving to live in a place you don't feel physically threatened on a daily basis. That can't be a comfortable way to live.

Second, to your "oldest friends", if they really have known you for a long time and really are your friends, they won't (or shouldn't) care. If they do, then they're just another close-minded asshat who you just happen to have known for a long time and thought (mistakenly) was "a friend"...that's their problem, not yours.

EDIT: I don't mean to sound overly callous or nonchalant about it. Loosing people you thought of as "friends" this way sucks. It does. But it happens. You move on.

New friends (yes, even gaming friends) come and go. That's just life.

Whether it is fear of "losing your gaming group" or fear of "being the next Matthew Shepherd"..no one should have to live in fear on a daily basis.

Guess that's all I have on that.

But, anyway, welcome to the boards and happy gaming (and move somewhere less...suffocating).

--Steel Dragons

 

[Vicar In A Tutu]

I play in an oathbound campaign. My charatcer was a guy named Folken who was an air shugenja (on his way to becoming a Void Disciple) and he and the party's monk were lovers. Well the group came from Rokugan and by his mistake, the party geisha died.

Knowing it was his mistake, he had her ressurected.

But that had a flaw. You see, in Rokugan, they dont have spells like that. So he got her brought back to life and had to set the balance. He told his lover good bye and commited Seppeku. It was quite sad.

Now im playing Drake Lacarde, a selfish 1/2 black dragon who doesnt care. He is a Fighter 4/Sorcererer 1 who deals in acid. He has a dracon face tattooed on his back and on his hips are dragon claws (to quote the players, grip holds).

He is much like bad Faith from Buffy and is all about fun fun fun.

Its quite a difference from the previous character

When I started reading this thread, I didn't notice that it was so old. Until I saw a post by Angelsboi. I've been with ENWorld since the begining (lurking since 1999), and I recall Angelsboi as one of the regular posters. Although I didn't have any connections to him, beyond simply lurking and reading some of his posts, I was stunned when he posted that he was terminally ill. I think it was around 2004 or 2005. I don't remember exactly when he died, but I think it was a friend that posted the news of his death here on ENWorld.

It was such a strange feeling seeing his name followed by this short and yet incredibly poignant piece of information: has no status.

 

[Achan hiArusa]

(( I'm posting this post on an alias. And I apologize to the site administrators for doing so, my reasons however should be both clear and obvious by the name I choose for the alias. ))

I'm a gamer, and I am a homosexual male. I also happen to live in the bible belt of America where neither is appreciated and I have been warned of 'going to Hell' for both of these things. Unfortunately it is also not physically safe for me to be open about my sexuality where I live.

Bashing happens, I've seen them, and the lack of response or care they receive where I live.

I am extremely open about my gaming hobby. I'm rather proud of it! I go to all the cons and I'm actually a semi public individual in the gaming industry. Definitely not an 'A' lister, heck I'm lucky if I'm a 'C' lister. ( I know it is unlikely that anyone would recognize who I am from what I've told / tell you in this post, but please, I ask those individuals who may to not post guessing my identity. )

I probably even self identify more as a gamer than I do as a homosexual. Gaming is what I choose to do, after all. The fact that it is also the aspect of my life I do not have to hide probably contributes to it quite a bit.

I don't think I will ever come out to my gaming friends simply because they are my oldest friends. I've known most of them for the better part of a decade and a half. And they know me as the nice guy GM who's a little awkward. I don't really want to risk loosing my game group simply for being 'out.'

But then again, I'm not 'out' at all. I lack the courage to be an open homosexual, and I respect those that have it.

Do they make a lot of gay jokes or involve themselves in gay bashing? Are they really religiously conservative (sorry but it is an indicator)? These would be signs that they have problems. But as a friend of ours I gamed with came out of the closet our chorus of reply was "And this is a surprise, how?"

 

[TarionzCousin]

I don't care if another gamer is gay, bi, straight, or whatever. But I sure could use a few more Drama Queens in my games.