Gross, Horrible Story
- Thread starter The Grumpy Celt
- Start date
Rl'Halsinor
Explorer
LOL!!! What a classic moment. Just curious, did the player have anything to say afterwards?
ROFL!
We had a major wish backfire in our campaign, many moons ago...it was funny, but not quite as scatalogically hilarious.
The party had been slogging through a dungeon, really getting pounded, and was on the verge of giving up and retreating, though it wasn't clear that a retreat would be survivable. Falzar, the dwarven fighter, said, "Hey, I've got a ring with a Wish on it. I'll use that!"
So, he wished:
"I wish that all of us were back in my hotel room in City-State...."
That would have been OK, probably...but then Falzar got greedy:
"...along with all the treasure, and all the stuff from this dungeon."
Now, clearly, by "stuff", he meant all the loot, but it was a poor choice of words, to be sure. The DM cackled gleefully...
...and ruled that the party, all the treasure, and every single item and monster in the entire dungeon, had suddenly materialized inside Falzar's hotel room.
The poor walls, floor, and ceiling of the room lasted a moment, then exploded, and the entire inn followed a moment later. An entire tribe of orcs was now loose in City-State, not to mention some trolls, and an enormous purple worm, last seen slithering up a street. The party deemed it to be the better part of valor to scoop up what treasure they could quickly grab, and make themselves scarce, before the authorities traced the sudden monstrous influx to them.
We had a major wish backfire in our campaign, many moons ago...it was funny, but not quite as scatalogically hilarious.
The party had been slogging through a dungeon, really getting pounded, and was on the verge of giving up and retreating, though it wasn't clear that a retreat would be survivable. Falzar, the dwarven fighter, said, "Hey, I've got a ring with a Wish on it. I'll use that!"
So, he wished:
"I wish that all of us were back in my hotel room in City-State...."
That would have been OK, probably...but then Falzar got greedy:
"...along with all the treasure, and all the stuff from this dungeon."
Now, clearly, by "stuff", he meant all the loot, but it was a poor choice of words, to be sure. The DM cackled gleefully...
...and ruled that the party, all the treasure, and every single item and monster in the entire dungeon, had suddenly materialized inside Falzar's hotel room.
The poor walls, floor, and ceiling of the room lasted a moment, then exploded, and the entire inn followed a moment later. An entire tribe of orcs was now loose in City-State, not to mention some trolls, and an enormous purple worm, last seen slithering up a street. The party deemed it to be the better part of valor to scoop up what treasure they could quickly grab, and make themselves scarce, before the authorities traced the sudden monstrous influx to them.
TheAuldGrump
First Post
Well. there's an elf that won't be going to Valhalla...
The Auld Grump, yes a story to go down in the anals of history...
The Auld Grump, yes a story to go down in the anals of history...
Amal Shukup
First Post
Really, I ought to just let this go but...
As he wished for all of it 'back', shouldn't it have all gone back where it was when he still, er, 'owned' it?
Not dying horribly under a torrential downpour so much as dying horribly in an immense excremental explosion... Approximately 1 Million Kilograms (2,414,475 Million Pounds) of, er, 'matter' compressed into a wee little elf. Briefly...
I guess it's moot, although I'm not sure the rest of the party'd be able to run fast enough to escape the area of effect though. I was starting to calculate the size of the area covered (treating it as a topsoil problem), but realized what I was doing and thankfully stopped myself...
A'Mal
As he wished for all of it 'back', shouldn't it have all gone back where it was when he still, er, 'owned' it?
Not dying horribly under a torrential downpour so much as dying horribly in an immense excremental explosion... Approximately 1 Million Kilograms (2,414,475 Million Pounds) of, er, 'matter' compressed into a wee little elf. Briefly...
I guess it's moot, although I'm not sure the rest of the party'd be able to run fast enough to escape the area of effect though. I was starting to calculate the size of the area covered (treating it as a topsoil problem), but realized what I was doing and thankfully stopped myself...
A'Mal
Gez
First Post
This is a great moral tale, as it teaches kids not to use vulgar profanities.
By speaking clearly and politely, using the proper words, such as "equipment" and in a clear, non-ambiguous way (such as "I wish to undo the effect of the Ruin card I pulled"), this frikkin' elf would have got all his goddamn sh♠t back!
By speaking clearly and politely, using the proper words, such as "equipment" and in a clear, non-ambiguous way (such as "I wish to undo the effect of the Ruin card I pulled"), this frikkin' elf would have got all his goddamn sh♠t back!
The only wish I ever used was something pretty humble(in 2e). I just wished that I would not be under the effect of forgetfulness that surrounded the vale where our DM placed the adventure in, ehrn you fail your saving throw (forgetting the outside when inside or the inside when outside). Three quarters of the other group members were pretty much immune to this effect(elves). I was very clever and closed every posible loophole but then the effect granting the wish was gone, with the DM smiling at me.
Wishes are pretty much unnecessary and a waste of time.
Wishes are pretty much unnecessary and a waste of time.
Keeper of Secrets
First Post
I am always drawn to threads with titles such as these. I was not disappointed. Thank you!
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