Piratecat
Sesquipedalian
Not that backseat diagnoses mean a damn thing, but he may have had Marfan Syndrome. If so, he could have been very sensitive about it.
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Have you ever driven a player from a game?
Jeff Wilder
First Post
That's really interesting, and certainly fits his physique. (Not that there was anything unattractive or disgusting about him, at all. Just those damned spidery fingers. I do remember that one of my remarks was to the effect that I bet he'd make some kinda world-class pianist, able to play a dual-level keyboard without moving his hands ... ) It seems an odd thing to be "sensitive" about, but I suppose I can grok it.
Wik
First Post
Well, I've had two or three "booted" characters, but the thing is, I'm friends with two of the three still. And I don't think any of them ever felt like they were "booted"
The first was a guy who would often not show up. He loved playing, he was immersed when he got there, and all that. Now, some of the other players made fun of him a bit, but that's my group - we tease each other, constantly. And he just never fought back. Turns out he was (is) suffering from depression, which was why he'd miss games. I wound up telling him "I'm not comfortable with you using the games as a vehicle for you dealing with outside problems. If you can't make regular apperances, it screws things up for everyone. The table's always open to you, once you can make the regular session time, but right now, your absences are hurting the entire party." He left on good terms, never came back. And, to the best of my knowledge, still hasn't taken any steps to deal with his depression.
Second was similar to the first - a guy that would drop in, play a few sessions, and then leave with no explanation. And then do it again. Usually, I'd have no idea he was gonna show up until he was there, rolling up a PC. His brother (a regular at my table) would just invite him, knowing I liked him. But it was a pain in the butt to just deal with. I finally just said "hey, if you can't make it every session, could you not show up? It's sort of a strain on everyone else". The guy hated 4e anyway, so it worked out well. He sometimes talks about joining the next campaign I run that isn't 4e, which sounds good. he's a fun player.
Finally, there was a guy who joined our Savage Tide campaign. Had fun, although he was a "voice actor" whereas the rest of the table generally prefers third person communication with NPCs. Our general attitudes - and the fact that we were a more beer and pretzels game and less focused on the fantasy world than he preferred - convinced him to leave. Which was fine, because I was getting annoyed with his fake flirting with my girlfriend at the time. And then, after the girlfriend and I broke up, I found him sending him all sorts of messages on facebook (he was supposedly my friend, and that's just bad "bro code"). He doesn't know it, but he's not allowed back at my table.
The first was a guy who would often not show up. He loved playing, he was immersed when he got there, and all that. Now, some of the other players made fun of him a bit, but that's my group - we tease each other, constantly. And he just never fought back. Turns out he was (is) suffering from depression, which was why he'd miss games. I wound up telling him "I'm not comfortable with you using the games as a vehicle for you dealing with outside problems. If you can't make regular apperances, it screws things up for everyone. The table's always open to you, once you can make the regular session time, but right now, your absences are hurting the entire party." He left on good terms, never came back. And, to the best of my knowledge, still hasn't taken any steps to deal with his depression.
Second was similar to the first - a guy that would drop in, play a few sessions, and then leave with no explanation. And then do it again. Usually, I'd have no idea he was gonna show up until he was there, rolling up a PC. His brother (a regular at my table) would just invite him, knowing I liked him. But it was a pain in the butt to just deal with. I finally just said "hey, if you can't make it every session, could you not show up? It's sort of a strain on everyone else". The guy hated 4e anyway, so it worked out well. He sometimes talks about joining the next campaign I run that isn't 4e, which sounds good. he's a fun player.
Finally, there was a guy who joined our Savage Tide campaign. Had fun, although he was a "voice actor" whereas the rest of the table generally prefers third person communication with NPCs. Our general attitudes - and the fact that we were a more beer and pretzels game and less focused on the fantasy world than he preferred - convinced him to leave. Which was fine, because I was getting annoyed with his fake flirting with my girlfriend at the time. And then, after the girlfriend and I broke up, I found him sending him all sorts of messages on facebook (he was supposedly my friend, and that's just bad "bro code"). He doesn't know it, but he's not allowed back at my table.
jonesy
A Wicked Kendragon
One player I've been driving from our game most nights for the past.. oh, I see what you meant.
As for kicking someone out, sure, there have been those. Worst one I can recall got thrown out when he started hitting on a players mom. As in, inappropriate touching. And after he was gone she noticed he'd stolen some of her underwear.
Then there was this girl who drew with a red marker all over manuals, answered every question with "what!", and liked to bring her not-at-all-housetrained dog over.
Early warning signs of schizophrenia? Or maybe just chronic dry eye. Yeah, I'm no expert.
As for kicking someone out, sure, there have been those. Worst one I can recall got thrown out when he started hitting on a players mom. As in, inappropriate touching. And after he was gone she noticed he'd stolen some of her underwear.
Then there was this girl who drew with a red marker all over manuals, answered every question with "what!", and liked to bring her not-at-all-housetrained dog over.
Cyronax
Explorer
I DMed for a homosexual male gamer who kept forgetting to respect other male gamers personal space. He was talked to several times by me. He kept doing it to varying degrees. He also would bring his laptop to the table (not a big deal) but would get really really distracted by it 3 out of 4 sessions. Those, among other more minor reasons, led me to drop an ultimatum about said behaviors. He didn't come back.
Wik
First Post
Ha. One weird player I had that I never booted (never got the chance to) but that deserves mention here:
An old friend of mine from high school, who unfortunately began doing WAY too many drugs. I grew up in an old logging town in BC, where most everyone did drugs (out my grad class of around 150, I was one of the five or six who had never touched marijuana... think about that)... and this kid was considered as "the drug kid".
At first, it was okay, and he was really into the games, knew the rules, and was never a disturbance. I had a "no drugs" rule at my table (due to an unfortunate event a year or two earlier), and he'd always show up fine. He was actually one of my favourite players to GM for. And then he got bad.
As in, the drugs messed him up bad. He'd start talking at random about how he had invented a phaser based off schematics he got off the internet. And he would never, ever blink. He'd just stare at you, with this weird smirk always on his face that was really creepy.
And yeah, he had personal space issues with everyone. He wouldn't stop touching people! It was definitely creepy. Any of my female friends who were gamers would play once, and then leave, because he would just stare at them with his creepy grin. I mean, he did it to EVERYONE, but it really made the women uncomfortable, for probably obvious reasons.
We'd game without him, for the most part, but sometimes someone would just BRING him to the table. We all felt sorry for him, since we knew how only a few years earlier he was a relatively normal guy, so we'd let him play. But they were always weird sessions.
Then he started bragging about how the government was giving him money because he had done too many drugs and couldn't get a job (which was true, he was getting disability cheques due to his perma-fried status). At around that point he went to the skate park, started telling a fifteen year old girl that he was "watching her" and the things he was "going to do to" her, and then followed her as she walked home (she wound up finding a block parent and hid in there until they called the cops).
We patently avoided him from then on. The few times I see him, I've learned to make plans "next week sometime", knowing there's no way in hell he'll remember to show up (not that he knows where to show up, of course - he never thinks to ask).
An old friend of mine from high school, who unfortunately began doing WAY too many drugs. I grew up in an old logging town in BC, where most everyone did drugs (out my grad class of around 150, I was one of the five or six who had never touched marijuana... think about that)... and this kid was considered as "the drug kid".
At first, it was okay, and he was really into the games, knew the rules, and was never a disturbance. I had a "no drugs" rule at my table (due to an unfortunate event a year or two earlier), and he'd always show up fine. He was actually one of my favourite players to GM for. And then he got bad.
As in, the drugs messed him up bad. He'd start talking at random about how he had invented a phaser based off schematics he got off the internet. And he would never, ever blink. He'd just stare at you, with this weird smirk always on his face that was really creepy.
And yeah, he had personal space issues with everyone. He wouldn't stop touching people! It was definitely creepy. Any of my female friends who were gamers would play once, and then leave, because he would just stare at them with his creepy grin. I mean, he did it to EVERYONE, but it really made the women uncomfortable, for probably obvious reasons.
We'd game without him, for the most part, but sometimes someone would just BRING him to the table. We all felt sorry for him, since we knew how only a few years earlier he was a relatively normal guy, so we'd let him play. But they were always weird sessions.
Then he started bragging about how the government was giving him money because he had done too many drugs and couldn't get a job (which was true, he was getting disability cheques due to his perma-fried status). At around that point he went to the skate park, started telling a fifteen year old girl that he was "watching her" and the things he was "going to do to" her, and then followed her as she walked home (she wound up finding a block parent and hid in there until they called the cops).
We patently avoided him from then on. The few times I see him, I've learned to make plans "next week sometime", knowing there's no way in hell he'll remember to show up (not that he knows where to show up, of course - he never thinks to ask).
Have had players leave/be asked to leave on rare occasions re: playstyle differences, just not gelling with the group etc.
Had an odd one about 2(3?) years ago where a player found us through this board, showed up and seemed to have a great time for about 3/4 sessions. Then, despite a "see you next session" comment, never heard from him again (I even e-mailed him to make sure everything was ok because he seemed so enthusiastic about the game; but never received a response).
Had an odd one about 2(3?) years ago where a player found us through this board, showed up and seemed to have a great time for about 3/4 sessions. Then, despite a "see you next session" comment, never heard from him again (I even e-mailed him to make sure everything was ok because he seemed so enthusiastic about the game; but never received a response).
Mark Hope
Adventurer
I've never done so intentionally. And I'm not aware of anyone who has left my game/groups I'm in saying "man, that Mark guy is a real jerk!" Or if they have, I've never heard about it later, lol.
I am sure, however, that I have driven players from the game through sheer boredom in my early years, or because they decided that my DMing (or just gaming) wasn't for them.
Oh. Wait. First proper group I ever ran a game for, we were all new to the hobby. First session of the campaign. I was DMing Keep on the Borderlands. One guy's character was killed by a spider (failed his save). I made him hand over his character sheet, ripped it up and threw it in the bin. He never came back. So, yeah. I guess that counts. Oh well. We remained friends out of the game. Never made that mistake again, though, heh.
I am sure, however, that I have driven players from the game through sheer boredom in my early years, or because they decided that my DMing (or just gaming) wasn't for them.
Oh. Wait. First proper group I ever ran a game for, we were all new to the hobby. First session of the campaign. I was DMing Keep on the Borderlands. One guy's character was killed by a spider (failed his save). I made him hand over his character sheet, ripped it up and threw it in the bin. He never came back. So, yeah. I guess that counts. Oh well. We remained friends out of the game. Never made that mistake again, though, heh
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TerraDave
5ever, or until 2024
Oh, I have had plenty of turn-over over the years. In general I blame Real Life and not myself.
I have noticed a few things:
-Players (I have known) are god-awfull at communicating what is really bothering them. This has led more to rising tensions then outright quitting (well, I guess, see statement on RL), but its actually a pretty major probelm.
-Breaks in the game, for whatever reason, can lead to players reflecting and deciding that its not for them, or I should say the next (stage of the) game is not for them. In general campaigns thrive off momentum. And of course, these players do not share these reflections efectively (see previous point).
-I have been recently recruiting new players. 3 have stuck and 2 have not. Again, RL was cited...but both the leavers were into WoW wereas none of the stayers play it. I do wonder if this is such a convient alternative that it makes TT play seem like to much of a hastle.
In any case, the ones I have recruited have been great, and more are on the way. So as far as the quitters are concerned, em.
I have noticed a few things:
-Players (I have known) are god-awfull at communicating what is really bothering them. This has led more to rising tensions then outright quitting (well, I guess, see statement on RL), but its actually a pretty major probelm.
-Breaks in the game, for whatever reason, can lead to players reflecting and deciding that its not for them, or I should say the next (stage of the) game is not for them. In general campaigns thrive off momentum. And of course, these players do not share these reflections efectively (see previous point).
-I have been recently recruiting new players. 3 have stuck and 2 have not. Again, RL was cited...but both the leavers were into WoW wereas none of the stayers play it. I do wonder if this is such a convient alternative that it makes TT play seem like to much of a hastle.
In any case, the ones I have recruited have been great, and more are on the way. So as far as the quitters are concerned,
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