I m a girl get over it

[TheAuldGrump]

Every single group I have ever run a game for has had at least one female player. And I have been playing since 1975.

Most of the groups have also had players who tried to bring girlfriends/wives into the game, with varying degrees of success. It runs to about 50% as to whether the significant other continues to play more than 2 weeks. It seems like the more enthusiastic they are to start with the more enthusiastic they remain, while those who are dragged to the game do not have a good time, and never do, often they make sure that nobody else does either. Curiosity counts as enthusiasm in this instance.

All the groups have acted pleased as punch when a female player was there for more than a month. Those female gamers who joined when the groups were forming invariably stayed with the group, but then they are also the ones who answered posters on the walls at game shops. I do not think that I have run into more than one or two really antifemale players, though I have met some who tried way too hard to be friendly, while smelling like the bottom of a baboon cage.

My current OGL Steampunk group has six players, two are female, and no baboon cage. Ah well, folk's experiences differ.

The Auld Grump

 

[Sarajaine"The Solar"]

As was said before, that's a pretty big chip on your shoulder. Calm down, we're generally a nice bunch of people here

My boyfriend and his mates are a very nice bunch of people and It is not the caseof me wanting to play the game with them. I am very aware that many people on this forum and worldwide have an exceptance of women in RPG's. This post was for the people out there who happen to think that dnd is not for girls. You obviously feel that anyone can play and for that I salute you. This thread was not to slate the dnd world whilst burning my bra in protest. This was a stand to say that girls have just as much right to play as guys and for those who agree with me then state your opinion don't think Im an irate girl with a chip on my shoulder.

 

[Will Nelson]

Is it just that we are the of the opposite sex or that you are afraid to let us into your world for fear we will see you at your most vulnerable and the concept of seeing you getting excited or even moved at slaying a dragon may make you lose any sexual credibility and make you less of a man.

Personally, I keep girls out of my games because I'm afraid at how turned on they will become when they hear how I'm slaying a dragon. A man can do with only so many distractions while gaming.

Seriously, I'd love if more girls gamed. Girls have a tendency to be, well, how can I put this? To be...more intelligent. Yeah, that sums it up. Girls are usually a lot smarter than guys, and I'd enjoy the chance to play a very cerebral game with them.

 

[Tom Cashel]

I would much rather my man conjure spells and be doing something constructive and fun than a belching, scratching yob leering at a football game.

I game a lot, but (as many people around here will attest to) I also enjoy drinking a few beers and yelling my head off at a hockey game (when there are hockey games to watch). I also write, love music, sing, play a little guitar, like to exercise, hang out with my wife and son, big film fanatic, have done a little acting, etc. I am more than "GAMER."

My point is that you seem to be bothered about negative stereotypes. Why on earth would you use such a negative stereotype of males to justify your argument?

 

[glass]

I don't have any girls in either of my groups at the moment, but I have had in the past. Never had a negative experience with any of them (well, no negative gaming experiences anyway).

IME, females have had, on average, a better grasp of the finer points of role-playing than equivalently experienced male gamers. If I have any preconceptions (and I try not to) regarding female gamers, they would be of that nature.

Long shot, but if you can get to Coventry, come join us!


glass.

 

[IcyCool]

I think for many guys, it is the fear that the girl will think they are a loser. Most guys (of my age) WILL lose "sexual credibility", and therefore be less of a man. It's the sad but honest truth, gaming is a turn-off to many, many girls. I'm glad you aren't one of them.

I'd just like to state that "sexual credibility" does not make a man. Seriously. If you like gaming, there is no need to be ashamed of it. If you are, then you either shouldn't game anymore (stop doing something that embarasses you), or you are undergoing certain hormonal changes (not yet physically a man, and most definitely not mentally a man). If a girl finds gaming a turn-off, and you like to game, then it's not going to work out. Plenty more fish in the sea and all that.

Some men may resent a woman intruding on what they feel is "guy time". Second, some gamers have little to no social skills, especially when it comes to females.

I'd just like to point out that IMO, these individuals are not men. Not mentally anyway. But YMMV.

I think the advice is good, give it a shot. It will be a kodak moment when you correct a guy on the rules. Also understand that getting called rookie is pretty common when you are new to any testosterone saturated activity. Just be glad you aren't a guy... you'd probably suffer even more. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to accept their behavior (and you shouldn't).

I agree with this statement. And it states what I was trying to say in my last post more clearly than I did.

 

[Krieg]

This post was for the people out there who happen to think that dnd is not for girls.

aka "a rant".

 

[I'm A Banana]

I think that when male gamers say that there are not many female gamers and that it ts a rare thing to find women who bring something to the game.
If guys talked more about RPG's and were'nt such closet geeks and actually gave girls a chance then the ratio of guy and girl gamers would be pretty even.

I hate to start somekind of feminist rebellion its just a shame that we don't get the same acceptance. All the gamers on this thread are ruled out for being pretty genuine nice people of course

Y'know, I think that probably a good majority of long-term partners have the exact same convo with their guys, only it's about, say, monday night football or the poker night or friday night with the boys at the bars or whatever.

The thing isn't that this is a D&D thing. It's that for your co-hottie (or at least his buds) it's a guy thing. There's a lot of guys out there who have "boys nights out" with poker or baseball or bars or whatever. D&D is just a way for your dude and his dudes to have a boy's night out.

So I would suggest handling this the same way that "poker widows" have handled it for years: don't try to muscle in on his guy-time. That's his time to fart and drink and be a man, or at least it apparently his for his friends. Adding another gender to the mix that they feel they have to be gentlemen around (whether or not they really do) obviously makes them feel odd, and I'd be willing to bet your boy feels it, too, but doesn't want to be a jerk about it.

That's not to say that you can't play D&D with him or that you're forbidden from the hobby because you're a beatiful woman. But instead of trying to jump in on his guy-friend-time, maybe ask him to help you game with you and some of your friends? Or maybe learn the game yourself, and have a little girls' night D&D alongside his guy's night D&D?

But IMHO, this has a lot less to do with D&D, and a lot more to do with the simple fact that most guys need someplace where they can stink and fart and make jokes about how women and The Man suck and generally be socially acceptable only to each other. D&D is how he and his friends get that quality male-bonding time. Trying to wedge yourself into that is aksing for trouble that has nothing to do with the game itself, and more to do with an atmosphere of fraternity. Let him have his guy time. But since you think you'd LOVE the game, too, you don't need to compromise your own interest just because in his mind it's tied to his male-bonding moments. You know the books, you've seen a game or two, get some friends, tell your man, and spend your Monday nights pretending to be a sun elf, too. Just, do what you can to not have to jump in on his guy-time to do it.

-- Kamikaze Midget, who has been converting totally hot cheerleader girls to the Dork Side since 2000.

PS: ...some of you guys sound WAY more torqued off about this than you should be. Lighten up.

 

[Tom Cashel]

I don't really wish to participate I just would appreciate the exceptance that I take an interest in their hobby and to be to be taken seriously for it.

Okay...so you don't really want to play at all. You just want to raise a big stink over something you don't actually want to do anyway.

What was that Bob Dylan song? "Just Like A Woman"?

 

[Arnwyn]

This post was for the people out there who happen to think that dnd is not for girls.

Well, guess it looks like your post has a very limited audience, then.