Do you realize what you've described is a good example of what the "other side" is talking about? Telegraphing, scene setting, challenging the player, making the players' choices matter, however we've been describing it.
I would say that there's a lot of gray areas. The ledge example may play out much the same other than I'd be okay if the response to my "what do you do" is "I make an acrobatics check 15 to get across".
I would also say that sometimes I do call for specific checks if it is called for by an external event or one that is not "telegraphed". Let's say the group is walking down a staircase in an abandoned building and it starts to collapse. I may call for acrobatics checks to avoid going prone and potentially falling. Event then the wizard could cast feather fall to avoid making an acrobatics check.
I don't do that often, but sometimes the unexpected happens. I see it the same as the party getting surprised by a fireball and everybody needs to make dex saves because the enemy wizard was invisible when they entered the room and the enemy got the drop on the party. Or like that time my friend had a goose commit suicide-by-car by dive bombing them as they drove down the highway. Nobody advertised kamikaze goose, it just happened. Now she did have a choice afterwards and could have stopped by a car wash and been late for her appointment rather than having to deal with goose smear that had been baking on a hot black car all day. But that was after the fact.