I'm a dragon

[PA]

Very well, seeing as you are now dwelling on the East Coast, we'll compromise on the name--CINDERELLER. Don't count on any prince or princess charming unless you can find some glass sneakers. Your most wicked stepfather has a game persona named Louhi Sharpnose, and kender are absolutely unknown in any games in which that PC plays.

Glass sneakers... Well, as it stands, that whole story about glass shoes may have been a confusion between two French homonymous: "vair" (the fur of a squirrel, with which you can indeed make shoes) and "verre" (glass). But I offer a compromise: what about plastic sandals?

Now scrub the kitchen floor and polish the woodowrk!

But... BUT... You already had me do that this morning! (Between 2 and 5 a.m.)

 

[PA]

A lake steeped in tradition. According to the signs it was here they would face the terrible dragon Pa... but they had not counted on encountering the Eldest of Wyrms... the fearsome creature known as Pladoh Xagyg.....

... whom the bold adventuring party will have to face BEFORE they can face PA.

 

[jdavis]

The bold adventurers had traveled far. From the foothills of The Insured lands through the farmlands of York as they crossed just north of the great city. At each juncture the Wizard Tacetarip (of Beanland) would examine the odd signs, written in the language of the deep tinkers. Each time he would nod knowingly and say "Yes, this way."; his companions Messonox (the learned healer), Greyshadow (the assassin), the winsome faeries that hired them, Deegee and Malessa would follow somberly. As they traversed the open countryside, past the city of steel, through the land of the Shy and their Spires of the Wind (including the tower of Seers) they saw much but avoided confrontation, they followed the odd signs till they finally came to a lake, not a great lake, but a good one. A lake steeped in tradition. According to the signs it was here they would face the terrible dragon Pa... but they had not counted on encountering the Eldest of Wyrms... the fearsome creature known as Pladoh Xagyg.....

I love these boards....

I feel like such a unimportant Dragon now, I don't have a pristine lake or a horrible mentor, heck everytime somebody tries to get Gnomes to post roadsigns to my lair they always get sidetracked at the Graveyard of Dead Vehicles down the road.

I am a foul and vicious beast who is tormented by racoons who break into his attic and the Blacksmith next door who beats the fenders of vehicles back into shape so very early in the morning.

 

[PA]

I feel like such a unimportant Dragon now, I don't have a pristine lake or a horrible mentor, heck everytime somebody tries to get Gnomes to post roadsigns to my lair they always get sidetracked at the Graveyard of Dead Vehicles down the road.

I am a foul and vicious beast who is tormented by racoons who break into his attic and the Blacksmith next door who beats the fenders of vehicles back into shape so very early in the morning.

Mh, sorry to say that pal, but... You need to buy a Dragons Slayer's Guide or something. Time to update your knowledge on the best way to get rid of vermins, be they slayers or sleep spoilers.

 

[jdavis]

Racoons are fearsome foes, I've been at war with them for three years now.

 

[PA]

Racoons are fearsome foes, I've been at war with them for three years now.

What's the CR?

 

[Col_Pladoh]

Vair Enough

Glass sneakers... Well, as it stands, that whole story about glass shoes may have been a confusion between two French homonymous: "vair" (the fur of a squirrel, with which you can indeed make shoes) and "verre" (glass). But I offer a compromise: what about plastic sandals?

But... BUT... You already had me do that this morning! (Between 2 and 5 a.m.)

Of course, PA, a change in required footware is acceptable. You may have hip boots of vair, showing the proper blue and white bell-shaped pattern, but they must be from the firm of Joan & David there in NYC.

That I failed to notice that the floor had been scrubbed and the woodwork polished is indicative of a less than satisfactory effort. I note a minute streak of dirt on the former, and my reflection in the wainscotting is somewhat less than mirror-like. Return to your tasks, and then prepare a breakfast of two eggs shirred in cream and served on buttered toast points, accompanied by six rashers of crisp bacon, an iced grapefruit half to preceed that, Kona coffee with the main course.

Happy New Year,
Gary

 

[Col_Pladoh]

Racoons are fearsome foes, I've been at war with them for three years now.

Perhaps you should follow a different tact. When we lived in the country some years back, I noted the many raccoons in the area, set about feeding them. Watching them devour chicken and turkey leg bones as if they were ice cream cones was amusing. The coons also enjoyed stale bread smeared with bacon fat. By the end of winter a half-dozen of the creatures were large, fat, and had glossy coats.

Of course my wife was bent on having a coat made of raccoon fur. Then in the spring, as the sow coons brought their kits to the door to have them lavishly provisioned as well, her heart was softened. Watching them react to a raccoon hand puppet was hilarious!

In the summer the cheeky critters were want to enter the house to check out the kitchen garbage can if a door were left open, and they would come and beg at the tables on the veranda if we were entertaining guests there, had food served.

When we sold the place I left the matter of these rescally varmints to the new owners...

Cheerio,
Gary

 

[jdavis]

I have nothing against Racoons who live outside but every winter we have them break into the eaves of the house and set up shop right over the bedroom, these are apparently some sort of super racoons who have the ability to pry out boards nailed over the holes they made previously. The main problem with them is that they apparently hold major sporting events above the bedroom at all hours of the night, and last year I had to cut open a wall to save a baby Racoon who had fallen between the studs. My ex-wife's mother keeps Racoons as pets as does one of my uncles.

The racoons around here would be at least a CR 3 for their use of tools and tactics, although I suspect there is a Boss Racoon somewhere out in the woods behind the house who has hatched a master plan to drive this old lazy Dragon from his domain.

 

[Col_Pladoh]

Clever Devils...

Hi jdavis

Yuppers, and I do really understand. We had one in out fireplace chimney last year as we never used the fireplace. He was a big old boar coon that made plenty of noise coming "home" and leaving. Raccoons are clever, and their paws are darned near as good as hands when it comes to opening things.

They do make great pets for those who are careful and patient. I has one when I was a boy, but now I prefer a lazy and less clever sort, a cat--no messes to clean up

Cheers,
Gary