Lame Names

[takasi]

OK, so yesterday I'm running an RPGA game. I provided fastplay characters, and the only thing the players have to do is come up with names (and preferably backstories, but names are required).

I ask the first player to come up with a name. He looks at a water bottle in his hand and he comes up with: "Aquafine". Groan.

OK, next person? "Drench".

Next? "Tsunami".

Last one? "Hoze".

Freeze dried characters I guess; just add water.

It was a one-shot with fastplays so I let it slide (and we actually had a very fun time).

So what are the worst character names you've encountered?

 

[Thunderfoot]

Once played in a group where everyone was named "George" - no last names, just George.
The DM eventually assigned number - George 1, 2, etc. So we started calling each other by the "appropriate" suffux The First, Junior, etc.

The rogues Nick Nak and Patty Whack are pretty close to the top of ...'ugghh' names too.

 

[takasi]

Once played in a group where everyone was named "George" - no last names, just George.

Did it take place in the module "Expedition to the Aisle of Novelty Grills"?

 

[megamania]

Had a Champions game where players were named "Fire Bob" and "Strong Bob" and of course there is always a black sheep in the family- "Cute Bobbi". They hailed from.... you guessed it- Planet Bob.

 

[Dragon Snack]

I had a player name a character "Temp".

I think it was a comment on my DMing...

 

[Thunderfoot]

Did it take place in the module "Expedition to the Aisle of Novelty Grills"?

No, this was several decades before Mr Foreman began giving birth (at least his wife anyway) to his same name clan... he was just a washed up boxer at the time.

 

[Festivus]

I had an NPC cleric named "Ferrusba", which wasn't terrible until you heard his last name of "Yulor"

 

[Owen K.C. Stephens]

So what are the worst character names you've encountered?

Boba Fett. For French Canadian D&D.

Gene-Eric Guy.

Dieten and Diesix. In fact, those two lead me to write my first article for Pyramid magazine: What's in a Name?"

On the other hand, I once had a minor NPC make succeed at every Dexterity-based thing he tried. Players started referring to him as "Dex" By the next session, Dexter had a name, a background, and a shiney new class level.

 

[ivocaliban]

While this isn't quite as bad as Evian or Aquafina...a Dread Pirate in Greyhawk named William Roberts always sort of stuck in my craw. First off, because it's a bit too contemporary for Greyhawk, in my opinion. The second reason is the obvious desire to essentially be the character from The Princess Bride. It's like naming a Barbarian Conan or a wizard Merlin.

I got him back though. He's not known as the Dread Pirate Roberts. Instead, he's earned the nickname "Bonny Bill."

 

[Alzrius]

I can't remember where, but I once saw a character in a modern RPG game who was named Dick Steel.

Man, that player must have had issues.