evilbob said:
Teflon Billy et al:
In every game I've ever run or played in we've always had at least one person - typically a male - playing a character of a different gender than their own. This has never - not a single time, ever - detracted from the game in any way. I honestly am having a hard time envisioning what it is you're talking about when you say you feel so strongly against this idea. I mean, I'm sure you have good reasons, (and you may have explained before but I've just not seen it,) but at the risk of hijacking this thread, can you elaborate on that?
Well, at the risk of hijacking this thread, I'll take a shot at it.
There are several reasons why I tend to dislike/disallow "cross-gender roleplay".
Bear in mind that these are personal preferences, and are likely based on the groups I regularly play with. I have no doubt that for some groups it wouldn't be an issue. YMMV.
First, I have yet to meet a male player who can realistically play a female character. DM's? Sure, but they normally only have to roleplay a single character for a short period of "screentime", while a player must stay in-character for the duration of the game/campaign.
For me, it's very jarring to have a female barbarian who mows down opponents in a blind fury, but then giggles and tee-hee's making eyes at any male NPC. Or worse yet, who is afraid of mice and stands on a chair when one appears. I wouldn't let a player of any gender, play a PC of any gender that was just a bunch of stupid stereotypes and disruptive quirks. Sadly, this is what the majority of cross-gender PC's that I encounter are.
The second reason I dislike/disallow cross-gender PC's is that I find a lot of the PC's being played are nothing but flimsy masks for the player's misogny. These are the guy who want to play the cold-hard-bitch PC's, or even worse, complete and total tramps.
Granted a lot of these issues come up because many of the male gamers I play with are somewhat socially inept and tend to objectify women. This seeps out when they try to then roleplay a female PC.
Would playing a realistic female character possibly help them come to terms with the opposite sex, and maybe be beneficial to them IRL?
Maybe, but that's not my job. I'm running a game. A diversion. Some light entertainment for a group of friends and acquaintances. I'm not trying to "educate the masses."
The final reason, which is for me, the biggest, albeit rarest reason I dislike/disallow C-GPC's is that I am not a therapist, counselor, or avid consumer of deviant pornography. This doesn't happen often, but there are gamers who just want to either explore alternative lifestyles IC as a manner of "working out their issues" IRL.
Forget it. Like I said, I'm not a counselor, therapist, etc. If you have gender/sexual issues I am the LAST person to discuss them with. I could be perfectly happy NEVER knowing the sexual orientation of any of my players. It's not data I need to play the game, so why bring it in?
If it's because you want help - I'm not that guy to help you.
If it's because you like to make people uncomfortable - then you're a prick and I don't want to game with you.
This is especially true of those gamers whose PC's have backgrounds that just scream "I was raped/abused/otherwise damaged and now I'm incorprating that into my gaming."
I saw this all the time as a Storyteller for a Vampire LARP. I think when I stepped down I had a 85% accuracy rating in guessing traumatic events in people's lives based on the PC's they played. It's one of the reasons I stopped LARPing. I have enough drama in my own life. I'd rather not be subjected to anyone else's.
When I read the post describing the former hooker who fell in love across gender lines and had a child stolen from her, I immediately got a bad vibe about it. Again, I don't know that player, so I can't say for sure that he's had sexual abuse, divorce and a homosexual realtionship in his real life, but those background elements certainly make me think he might.
Those aren't issues I want to address when I game. Those are issues I'd only be willing to address with someone I cared about, not a casual acquantance I play a fantasy game with. Maybe that makes me a distant, uncaring person, but to me it makes the person who wants to subject the group to those themes fairly inconsiderate as well.
Again, I'm not passing judgement on these players. We all have things in our lives that we use as fuel for gaming. Big traumatic events, or major life issues are bound to come up sometime of another. I'm just saying that given the people I game with, and the kinds of games I want to run, I'm not comfortable with any of the cross-gender roleplaying I've encountered in the last 25 years.