There are two conversations here: what's too mean to do to your characters, and what's too difficult to use at the table.
Grapple is a nifty ruleset, and I like that it feels real, but that column made me realize how much time I lost to it in my games. I mean, three levels of rolls for one action (touch attack, grapple, pin)? Sheesh. We use it, but I wish it were easier.
If find improved grapple easier to use: it's one roll in addition to an attack roll. If they make the roll, they do damage. Pretty easy if-than proposition.
So I'm thinking of streamlining grapple:
If you do not have improved grapple:
Grapple is a standard action.
As a standard action, you grapple with a chosen target.
If the grapple is successful, you pin the target and do damage.
Each round is an opposed grapple
Additional grappler is a helping check. More limbs than two counts as a helping check.
They must break the grapple before they can perform any other action. Breaking a grapple is a move action.
Grapple modifier stands as is: BAB, str bonus, modifier
If you are the Grappler, you can do nothing else but grapple, and move half your movement rate. If you are the grapplee, then you can only break a grapple or cast a spell if you succed on a concentration check. It doesn't matter what the components are.
Ending a grapple is a free action for the Grappler.
Entangle is a area effect grapple, pinning but doing no damage.
Black Tentacles is an area effect grapple, pinning and damaging.
See, entangle was another thing that came up as a pain in last nights game. Two different sets of rolls to resolve a single spell. Ack.
We use them, but they kill the fun of the game.
Other examples of nuclear rules are polymorph, which I think is an easy fix: the only thing you gain from a transformation is a natural weapon.
Polymorph should exist to change your appearance. All the stat changes and ability modifiers are, are magic freebies. If you want a character that doesn't just look like a troll, but is as strong as a troll, then why not use Bull's strength?
Sundering and Bull's strength I think are both pretty straightforward.
I like attacks of opportunity, but if I could figure it out, I would qualify them less.