D&D General Orc and Pie, Redux

[FireLance]

Please critique my new one-shot!

An orc of indeterminate alignment wearing a flour-dusted apron and a chef's toque is standing in the marketplace next to a push-cart containing a single pie of indeterminate filling that nonetheless looks delicious.

How do you obtain the pie, while being respectful of the orc's right to life and property?

 

[cbwjm]

Pay for it? They're standing in the marketplace, presumably they've been there before since if no one else in the marketplace is kicking up a fuss then I'd say there are no issues with the orc being there.

 

[jasper]

What is the inside

 

[Fenris-77]

You haven't sold me on the pie. Where's the delicious smell? The delightful golden brown of well-cooked pastry, redolent with butter? Is it savory or sweet? Berries or Fruit? Halfling or Gnome? These are all important things to know.

 

[Oofta]

You haven't sold me on the pie. Where's the delicious smell? The delightful golden brown of well-cooked pastry, redolent with butter? Is it savory or sweet? Berries or Fruit? Halfling or Gnome? These are all important things to know.

Well, everybody knows that if it's halfling you'll just be hungry a half hour later. Gnome? Might as well just swallow a bag of rat poison. It would be faster, although maybe that's the point?

 

[Fenris-77]

I don't mind Gnome, it's tasty enough, especially with some cumin and garlic, but it's a little like goat in that they never take all the little bones out. No one wants to break a molar on their pie filling.

 

[Oofta]

I don't mind Gnome, it's tasty enough, especially with some cumin and garlic, but it's a little like goat in that they never take all the little bones out. No one wants to break a molar on their pie filling.

Forest gnome maybe. I assume no one would be crazy enough to do rock/tinker gnome. I mean, talk about explosive diarrhea.

 

[GMMichael]

Please critique my new one-shot!

An orc of indeterminate alignment wearing a flour-dusted apron and a chef's toque is standing in the marketplace next to a push-cart containing a single pie of indeterminate filling that nonetheless looks delicious.

How do you obtain the pie, while being respectful of the orc's right to life and property?

Erm, seems pretty short for a one-shot. Let's beef it up a little:

• The orc is part of a mercenary crew, the rest of whom are waiting, incognito, around the market.
• The mercenary crew is waiting for a wealthy merchant to roll through the market so they can deliver a death threat from another merchant.
• The orc doesn't really want to sell her pie - she wants to accidentally drop it in front of the merchant so the wagon must stop for a minute.
• The local watch is present with enough numbers to effectively, if not actually, prevent bloodshed.

Side note: what's this "right to life and property?" Is the orc noble?

 

[Ruin Explorer]

Well I just learned that I find the idea of eating gnomes a lot funnier than I probably should.

Side note: what's this "right to life and property?" Is the orc noble?

That's why the plan is going to fail though, isn't it? They won't stop for non-noble trying to pick up a pie in the street, they'll just ride them down!

 

[Cadence]

@Oofta Surely there's a way to use a hammer (Dwarven returning?) to throw at him with money on it and snag the pie with the handle in a completely safe fashion, isn't there?