Parental advice needed

[Desdichado]

I wouldn't worry if it was my kids (although they haven't seen that particular movie, they've seen others.)

We watched "violent" movies all the time when we were younger; Indianna Jones, Errol Flynn's swashbucklers, and others. We played with toy swords and guns as far back as I can remember; certainly by the time I was 4 I know I had done so plenty, and I know my younger brothers had done even more.

I dunno. Seems a natural part of growing up to me. I don't think it's anything to worry about.

 

[Tonguez]

My son is now 5 and for many years I tried to keep him away from toy guns and plastic swords. It didn't work due to the presence of neighbours and cousins (in particular his 20 yr old cousin!)

So anyway now that he was playing with plastic guns it was time to teach him that guns are for shooting ducks, deer and rabbits (all of which he has seen hanging in the shed) NOT people. This he accepts and as a result he doesn't like playing 'cops & robbers' with the neighbours kids (he will play trucks, farmers and duck hunters with gusto however)

He got his first sword from a neighbour and I decided to introduce him to the idea of fencing and I brought him a bow & arrow (which he uses to hunt chickens at his grnadparents farm)

As to the Mummy et al - I'd let my son watch it but be sure to explain things to him (whatever your values are with regard to such). My nephew was a babe when Conan first came out (and I was 16 or so) and he wopuld often play with plastic swords and do the conan pose - he's a well adjusted 20 yr old now

 

[Oryan77]

It sounds like you care about your kids well-being and are on top of things as far as being a parent. I wouldn't worry at all about the violence as long as you teach your kid right from wrong.

I always had a big fantasy imagination. I was into playing army and swordsman all the time as a kid. And now I do it as an adult, only I'm not jumping around outside all dressed up with wooden or plastic weapons...I just pretend at the D&D table with dice. My dad is a big movie buff and always let me & my bro watch whatever we wanted on tv. My friends and I used to get sticks & broom handles and hammer nails into them to make weapons to play with. I knew right from wrong, so I never hit anyone with my weapons, I never broke anything, and I never hurt myself. We just walked around pretending to be warriors and had a blast. The only thing that needed to worry about us were the trees we smacked with our weapons.

I think if you just teach your kid how to be a good smart person, there won't be any problems. If he likes sword fighting, you could even get some plastic swords and play with him. When he gets too rough, let him know "Hey, don't do that, that can hurt someone. Don't hit so hard. You need to be careful with these toys or you can't play with them."

 

[Blessed Kitten]

Kitten, you got to be careful with negative natality rate as the solution for quality of life.

I don't want to drag this thread into an offtopic socio-political discussion, but I do realize that younger people tend to be the labor force in society. I don't think I said anything about "drastic" or even "control". If I did, I didn't mean to, and allow me to replace those terms with these two: "gradual" and "voluntary". I generally resent authority, and avoiding major destructive social upheaval is ultimately what its all about.

My final comment on the subject will be this: unlimited growth is ultimately unsustainable, and when it breaches the threshold of sustainability there will be a period of normalization. What that means for human society is war, famine, disease and death. I'd like to avoid that if possible.

And a link: www.populationconnection.org

 

[punkorange]

I am a father, but my son is only 20 months, so things like this isn't as big of an issue yet. I can't really say anything that the others haven't said already.


I would however like to say that after reading through this thread a bit, I am glad, and a bit proud, to see the gaming community coming togather with concerns and advice of this nature.

 

[Kapture]

Oh, hey. I worry about the violence issue with my kid, too. Killing Monsters is a great recomendation. It rationalized my worries about the effects of media. But it sounds like your wife could use it more than you.

Killing Monsters doesn't really address the issue that mythago brought up, as I remember, about degrees of violence. Dawn of the Dead vs. Beowulf. I personally wouldn't take Poppy to see Kill Bill 2 (although I didn't like the first one so much, myself). Or Dawn of the Dead. I think I worry more about her finding it too scary than about it warping her poor little head forever. I mean, the news and high school will do that.

But then, I know what I asked for as a kid, and it wasn't gore (not until junior high school, anyways). I always turned the channel off if I couldn't hack it.

 

[Kapture]

I think if you just teach your kid how to be a good smart person, there won't be any problems. If he likes sword fighting, you could even get some plastic swords and play with him. When he gets too rough, let him know "Hey, don't do that, that can hurt someone. Don't hit so hard. You need to be careful with these toys or you can't play with them."

Which I think is solid, too.

 

[reveal]

The only thing I can suggest is to lock up your swords so he can't hurt himself. I wouldn't hide them from him or make him think they are "taboo" but I wouldn't keep them in a location that is easily accessible to him.

My son, who is 3, plays with his Justice League figures and they fight each other. I've introduced him to the concept of bad guys and good guys, superheroes and villians, and he gets it. I have also explained to him that hitting and violence is wrong and he's to the point where he doesn't hit but he does get aggressive when playing, as most little boys do. So I have no problem with that.

 

[reveal]

Oh, hey. I worry about the violence issue with my kid, too. Killing Monsters is a great recomendation.

My son was afraid of monsters in his room for a bit. Now, he tells me if he sees a monster he'll scare it and does a little "RAHR" attack face. And then he tells me he'll cut them like Batman (with one of his batarang's).

 

[billd91]

I have a second boy on the way and my wife is getting scared I think that in a few years the house will become a battlefield .

Oh, it will become a battlefield. I guarantee it. But it will become one whether they watch violent media or not.

I have a 6 year old daughter and 6 month old son so this is a relevant topic for me too. When we first got Fellowship of the Ring on DVD in 2002, at the 4, she cheered when Aragorn cut off the uruk-hai's head at the battle of Parth Galen. First time she had seen it. She knew who the heroes were and that's important.
I would recommend following the suggestions to steer away from morally ambiguous violence in favor of more clear-cut morality. Let the kids believe in heroes and villains and start to blend in the questions of nuanced morality with respect to real life as topics come up on the evening news.
The key to all of this, I think, is monitoring what the kids are doing in general, being on hand to put things in context, and generally being involved in their viewing choices.