Positivity: What I'm doing to combat sexism in TTRPGs

[Warpiglet-7]

I am not doing much for the community at large. But I play with my kids which includes daughters.

They are powerful and heroic or not…but never “less than” or have less variety of options due to being female.

the main powerful threat in their campaign happens to be a female figure…but if they can check that threat, they will move the campaign. I am hoping they can pull it off!

My little slice of doing good is treating them with respect at the gaming table and setting the expectation that is simply normal and natural. Their brother is watching too.

For what it is worth their brother treats them
With respect at the table.

The women can be the best and the worst in the game world…but they are not restricted or pigeonholed.

They are pushing me to play over Christmas break so I better get another brew and keep planning!

 

[Jd Smith1]

We have been sexism-free at my table for years.

Although we have no female players, either.

Its a lot easier to combat sexism in those circumstances.

 

[The Soloist]

From 2e to 5e, my wife and several other women played in my D&D campaigns. For a while during 2e, we did split DM sessions on Saturdays. I would DM for five hours, and then we would switch to another campaign DMed by a woman for another five hours. It was a very cool experience.

 

[Bayushi_seikuro]

This is so sad. The idea that "I was bullied so I must bully you" is heartbreaking. The opposite should be the case. Nobody should want others to experience the hurt that they felt.

Yes, nerds were bullied. We get it. We all know that. And now nerds are cool. That doesn't mean that now it's the turn of somebody else. It's not a badge of achievement, it's a sad historical reality of human nature. We're supposed move on from it, not become those people.

I think that's the problem and why we need to be pro-active about making our changes.

It doesn't matter the situation - all too often, the oppressed or bullied, once they get some element of control and power, use it against others. It's not always conscious - when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail - but we need to do better. It reminds me of the fact that if someone has a good experience somewhere, they'll tell three people; if they have a bad experience, they'll tell more like thirty.

 

[Snarf Zagyg]

This is so sad. The idea that "I was bullied so I must bully you" is heartbreaking. The opposite should be the case. Nobody should want others to experience the hurt that they felt.

Yes, nerds were bullied. We get it. We all know that. And now nerds are cool. That doesn't mean that now it's the turn of somebody else. It's not a badge of achievement, it's a sad historical reality of human nature. We're supposed move on from it, not become those people.

I agree completely, and it breaks my heart. This may shock people that are familiar with me, but I've written about it before...

But basically, it is so heartbreaking that the game that they loved years ago .... precisely because it game them a feeling of belonging and community and acceptance ... is the same game that they are now standing athwart, shouting "Stop! We don't want your kind on OUR game."

D&D (and all TTRPGs) are for everyone. I want kids and teens to find joy and community (and in some cases, themselves) just like us olds were able to do so.

The true spirit of D&D isn't the rules. It isn't the history (no matter how many words I might write). It isn't even the game. It's the people.

 

[Riquez]

As someone who likes to play with minis, I really want to see more women minis on the table, and I don't just mean PCs.

I mean like, I have orcs, town guards, goblins, etc in my mini box and they're all men.

For example, I'm looking to get minis for Cyberpunk/Modern and Anvil Industry has both Men and Women versions of most of their stuff. Vae Victis has women orcs in their orc pack, that sort of thing.

My wife & I both play RPGs together & we both like using minis so ive always made sure to buy female options.
There's plenty out there.
Her first one was a female half-orc barbarian. We have women cthulhu minis, women sci-fi minis, & fantasy ones. Not that many monsters are female, but i have female ghosts, witches, naga
For D&D PCs its about 50%, 9 or 10 of each.

 

[Longspeak]

I'm an old (middle-class, white, male, cis) gamer, and I've struggled for years with a TON of implicit assumptions and the general wrong-headed things I grew up with in the 80s. Most of us did. I thought I was one of the good ones because I never went out of my way to be one of "those guys." But so much is just... baked in. It takes work to overcome it. I like to think I've come a long way, but I don't kid myself that I'm perfect.

But I see examples daily of folk who have never taken time to examine that thinking. There was a time I could make allowance for someone who never had the opportunity to reflect on the sins they visit one others. They help me realize I've evolved... at least a bit.

And I think the gaming helped, at least for me. Especially but not exclusively as I started adulting in the mid-80s, I've had lots of chances to meet those implicit assumptions head on. In games, but also around the table.

Today, I try to live up to it. I check in with players frequently to make sure I'm not stepping wrong, read other's writings on the subject, and generally to my best to make my games an inclusive space.

It's all about respect... but it can be so easy to forget to show it... or even to know what is and isn't sometimes. And if someone slips but they're trying, I nudge them. A few times a nudge wasn't enough, and those folk aren't in my games anymore.

 

[GMMichael]

It's all about respect... but it can be so easy to forget to show it... or even to know what is and isn't sometimes. And if someone slips but they're trying, I nudge them. A few times a nudge wasn't enough, and those folk aren't in my games anymore.

XP for truth and simplicity. Respect, please.

But if you want to get hardcore about it (or literal?), you could create some new dragons for the PCs to fight. Racist dragon. Sexist dragon. Ableist dragon. Slay those demons. Designing the breath weapons could be interesting!

 

[Clint_L]

2. To date, I have pushed/prodded at the point of a battle-lance three of my lady gaming associates into the GM's chair*...

Could I do more? Probably, although what exactly I am unsure of. That's why I'm pestering you people. Readers who believe that I'm doing little more than paying lip service need not reply.

Don't call them "lady gaming associates." My spouse hates being called "lady;" a lot of women do.

I think what you are doing is awesome!