RPG Evolution: When Gaming Bleeds

Monte Cook Games recently released Consent in Gaming, a sensitive topic that addresses subjects that make some players uncomfortable. Central to the understanding of why there's a debate at all involves the concept of "bleed" in role-play.

Monte Cook Games recently released Consent in Gaming, a sensitive topic that addresses subjects that make some players uncomfortable. Central to the understanding of why there's a debate at all involves the concept of "bleed" in role-play.

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Picture courtesy of Pixabay.​

Bleed Basics

Courtney Kraft explains bleed:
It’s a phenomenon where the emotions from a character affect the player out of the game and vice versa. Part of the joy of roleplay comes from diving into the fantasy of being something we’re not. When we play a character for a long time, it’s easy to get swept up in the highs of victorious battle and the lows of character death. When these feelings persist after the game is over, that’s when bleed occurs.
Bleed isn't inherently bad. Like actors in a movie, players sometimes draw on experiences to fuel their role-playing, consciously or subconsciously, and this bleed can happen organically. What's of concern in gaming is when bleed has detrimental consequences to the player.

Consent in Gaming explains the risks of negative bleed:
There’s nothing wrong with bleed—in fact, it’s part of the reason we play games. We want to be excited when our character is excited, to feel the loss when our characters do. However, bleed can cause negative experiences if not handled carefully. For example, maybe a character acted in a way that your character didn’t like, and it made you angry at the player too. Or maybe your character is flirting with another character, and you’re worried that it’s also making you have feelings for the player. It’s important to talk about these distinctions between characters and players early and often, before things take an unexpected turn.
There are several aspects that create bleed, and it's central to understanding why someone would need consent in a game at all. Bleed is a result of immersion, and the level of immersion dictates the social contract of how the game is played. This isn't limited to rules alone, but rests as much on the other players as it is on the subject matter.

One of the experiences that create bleed is a player's association with the game's subject matter. For some players, less realistic games (like Dungeons & Dragons) have a lower chance of the game's experiences bleeding into real life, because it's fantasy and not analogous to real life. Modern games might have the opposite effect, mirroring real life situations a player has experience with. There are plenty of players who feel otherwise of course, particularly those deeply involved in role-playing their characters for some time -- I've experienced bleed role-playing a character on a spaceship just as easily as a modern game.

The other element that can affect bleed is how the game is played. Storytelling games often encourage deeper emotional involvement from a player, while more gamist tabletop games create a situational remove from the character by their nature -- miniatures, tactical combat, and other logistics that are less about role-playing and more about tactics. Live Action Role-Playing games (LARPs) have the player physically inhabit their role and are thus provide more opportunities for bleed. Conversely, Massive Multi-Player Online Role-Playing Games (MMORPGs) might seem like they make bleed unlikely because the player is at a computer, experiencing the game through a virtual avatar -- and yet it can still happen. Players who play a game for a long time can experience more bleed than someone who just joined a game.

Dungeons & Dragons is a particular flashpoint for discussions of bleed, because while it is a fantasy game that can easily be played with disposable characters navigating a dungeon, it can also have surprisingly emotional depth and complexity -- as many live streams of tabletop play have demonstrated.

These two factors determine the "magic circle," where the reality of the world is replaced by the structure of another reality. The magic circle is not a magic wall -- it's porous, and players can easily have discussions about what's happening in the real world, make jokes derived from popular culture their characters would never know, or even just be influenced by their real life surroundings.

The deeper a player engages in the magic circle, the more immersed that player becomes. Governing the player's social contract within the magic circle is something Nordic LARP calls this "the alibi," in which the player accepts the premise that their actions don't reflect on them but rather their character:
Rather than playing a character who is very much like you (“close to home”), deliberately make character choices that separates the character from you and provides some differentiation. If your character has a very similar job to your ideal or actual job, find a reason for your character to change jobs. If your character has a very similar personality to you, find aspects of their personality that are different from yours to play up and focus on. Or play an alternate character that is deliberately “further from home”.

Bleeding Out

Where things get sticky is when real life circumstances apply to imaginary concepts. Bleed exists within the mind of each player but is influenced by the other players. It is fungible and can be highly personal. Additionally, what constitutes bleed can be an unconscious process. This isn't necessarily a problem -- after all, the rush of playing an awesome superhero can be a positive influence for someone who doesn't feel empowered in real life -- unless the bleed touches on negative subjects that makes the player uncomfortable. These psychological triggers are a form of "bleed-in," in which the player's psychology affects the character experience. Not all bleed moments are triggers, but they can be significantly distressing for players who have suffered some form of abuse or trauma.

Consent in Gaming attempts to address these issues by using a variety of tools to define the social contract. For players who are friends, those social contracts have likely been established over years through both in- and out-of-game experiences. But for players who are new to each other, social contracts can be difficult to determine up front, and tools like x-cards can go a long way in preventing misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Thanks to the increasing popularity of tabletop role-playing games, players are coming from more diverse backgrounds with a wide range of experiences. An influx of new players means those experiences will not always be compatible with established social contracts. The recent incident at the UK Gaming Expo, as reported by Darryl is an egregious example of what happens when a game master's expectations of what's appropriate for a "mature" game doesn't match the assumed social contract of players at the table.

This sort of social contract reinforcement can seem intrusive to gamers who have long-suffered from suspicion that they are out of touch with reality, or that if they play an evil character, they are evil (an allegation propagated during the Satanic Panic). This need to perform under a "cover" in their "real" life has made the entire concept of bleed and its associated risks a particularly sensitive topic of discussion.

X-cards and consent discussions may not be for everyone, but as we welcome new players with new experiences into the hobby, those tools will help us all negotiate the social contract that makes every game's magic circle a magical experience.
 

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Michael Tresca

Michael Tresca

For those DMs who don't like it...

Session zero (or even, when announcing to people that you have a new campaign)/In the convention booklet:

"NX. No X card will be used in this game. Judge accordingly if you want to play."
or
"X. This game will use the X-card mechanic. Judge accordingly if you want to play."

If adopted as a general convention, that ironically means an "X-rated" game would be the one withe the LEAST likelihood of sex and gore.

...
As an aside to one of the comments above, "If they had a deathly allergy, would it be "bonkers" to make sure the pizza you ordered that night didn't have mushrooms on it?"

If the majority of people liked mushrooms, we would order a pizza with mushrooms and the allergic person can get one without them for themselves. (Like any decent gaming group gets only ONE Pizza!)
 

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Dire Bare

Legend
I had an interesting session that indirectly relates to this discussion.

We have a player who plays AL at our FLGS. He is almost entirely blind. Eyes clouded over, white cane, uses an app that reads his character sheet to him and announces die rolls out loud. Normally, I just treat him like everyone else since all the issues that would require special accommodation have already been addressed.

Last week we started Decent into Avernus and in chapter one there is a pirate captain who is described with having one blind eye, clouded over. Even his name refers to his blindness. As I read the description, I thought to myself that it would inappropriate to stick to that characterization, so I changed it on the fly.

I have been DMing for a long time, so it didn't interfere much with the flow. But, I could see some DM's being totally oblivious to something like that. Personally, I don't have much need for the consent cards/questionnaires/etc., but as our hobby grows I can see them having a place at some tables.

Awesome man, for being thoughtful towards your blind player.

However, consider this . . . avoiding including characters or situations in our stories that mirror real life issues can have the opposite effect than intended, it can create a fantasy world where there are no blind people, or folks with limited mobility (crutches, paralyzed, etc), or folks who fit into other categories (cultural, racial, religious, gender/preference). Your blind player might not have been offended in the least with a pirate captain blind in one eye. In fact, he might have been tickled that there are folks in your fantasy world like him to some degree! If I had a blind AL player in one of my games, I wouldn't skip past issues of blindness in the game, but I probably would check in with him afterwards to see how he felt about things. I'd definitely want to have that conversation with a regular player, and hopefully include normal, everyday NPC's who are blind, in addition to some blind villains and heroes too!

EDIT: The word I'm looking for is "representation". If I were blind, I might want to have people like me represented in our shared fantasy world, blind commoners, blind heroes, blind villains. Overdo it and I'll think you're pandering to me, but a reminder every now and then would be awesome.
 
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S'mon

Legend
If the majority of people liked mushrooms, we would order a pizza with mushrooms and the allergic person can get one without them for themselves. (Like any decent gaming group gets only ONE Pizza!)

This is a serious issue for me as I am hosting my monthly group on Saturday, and planning to provide takeaway pizza, in contrast to the gourmet delicious foodstuffs my American & French players do when they host... I think if I send my son (12) out to buy all the pizzza, I can disclaim responsibility for the outcome, and he'll come back with a lot of greasy but tasty Peperoni.
 

Ovinomancer

No flips for you!
"I haven't seen it, so it can't be an issue!" is a common argument, whether it be about a mechanic that's found problematic, or an issue of table management. It isn't a particularly strong argument.

First, we have the issue that one person's subjective memory of things from decades ago is.. anecdote, not data. Even if you were 100% correct, you don't stand as a large enough representative sample, statistically thinking.

For another, that you didn't see it, doesn't mean it didn't happen. Have you considered the possibility that, for most of the past 40 years, there has been such a stigma of such stuff that, if you didn't explicitly invite people to say anything, they would just sit and suffer? Or maybe leave the table to "go to the bathroom" or "have a cigarette" as a cover to get away and gather their composure?

Most people will reject that possibility, but... well, lots of guys say they know for certain that sexual harassment doesn't happen, because they've never seen it. Guess what? It happens, and it either happens when we aren't looking, or we fail to recognize it (or dismiss it as not meaningful) at the time.

"I haven't seen it" is not an argument against the existence of ways of dealing with such issues. I mean, my house has never burned down, but I have smoke detectors and a fire extinguisher. Risk mitigation is about finding low-cost ways to handle high-cost negative events.

Consider the following - Let us say these things don't happen at your table. But, you implement the X-card (or some other communication tool). You put out one lousy index card, and spend two minutes explaining it. If, as you say, this is never an issue, then... nobody uses the card. You are out one whole index card, and whole minutes of time.

It isn't exactly expensive.
Heh, a modern version of Pascal's Wager.
 

Celebrim

Legend
Bleed is a fascinating thing. A little bit of bleed can be exciting, a sign that the game is coming to life for the table, that everyone is invested.

Too much bleed is an ugly thing, and can wreck a session or even the group itself.

In the LotR, Galadriel tell Frodo that she's unsure what he means by "magic" because mortals use it to lump together a bunch of things which are entirely unlike. I feel the same way about the term "bleed".

The examples I'm getting are things that are entirely unlike each other. In fact, some of them even feel like they might be abusive, in that I can see people manipulating the term to suggest that the victim is the one at fault for feeling "bleed". Indeed, I can see hints of victim self-blame in some of the examples that were linked to, and that's not cool.

Beyond that, I think mixing the already controversial ideas of "bleed" up with the equally controversial topic of "consent" does neither topic any favors. Bleed can occur independently of consent. Consent violations can occur independently of bleed. The two things aren't really strongly related in my opinion.

And for that matter, I'm far from convinced the "consent" paradigm is the best way to discuss everything that might make someone feel uncomfortable at the table. The fact that so much of the language around "consent" was drawn from sexual assault just mixes up things that don't need to be conflated in a way that ensures maximum drama, discomfort, and distress around a conversation that is supposed to be about minimizes drama, discomfort, and distress. To say nothing about the fact that I think it trivializes sexual assault by lumping that sort of horror into a broader class of things that just aren't sexual assault.
 

D

Deleted member 7015506

Guest
@Umbran
I agree, that personal opinions/experiences are not data. I also agree, that it is a very very changing world.
In the days were i started playing many issues were never talked about, simply kept in secret or not that present in the media as we have it nowadays. Also the awreness of people increased a lot ( and to the better). Many of the nasty things were just silenced or by some stupids pretended not to be present.
But in long past times certain subjects were not part of roleplaying, there was a kind of what I would call a Code of Ethics. The bad issues were not a part of the game. There were those things like blood sacrifices, the kidnapped princess and orcs raiding the village. Let your imagination run wild, but ask yourself, how do half-orcs come into existence? For me the answer is pretty obvious, since Grunge doesn´t look nor behave like Romeo (at least in my small world of understanding RPGs).
I will never ever deny such things as sexual harrasment, domestic violence and child abuse to happen just at this moment as we are talking about them. They are, and unfortunately were!, always happening, but fortunately society changed, media availability and awareness improved and nowadays the situation is different compared to the past (which is absolutely good). That is definitely not helping the victims of such acts, but perhaps it might prevent further abuse, since a neighbour nowadays is more likely to call the police and perhaps prevents further violence.
But just take those covers from the Weird Tales magazines. Nowadays no serious publisher would dare to have them nowadays for good reasons. But it was part of the past and basically nobody took offense in them. Like said nowadays? No way and that is good.
The problem I intended to point out (and horribly lost) is, that in the times we are living in, a basically "innocent" concept of gaming (and please no discussion about racism against the goblinoid races) is getting dragged into the "normal" life, where everything has to be tailored/reevaluated/considered if it might hurt somebodies feelings.
And I wholeheartedly disagree to use that so-called x-card. If you run your adventures in a halfway civilized manner leaving out those disgusting elements of real life (and yes I am a big fan of large scale combat scenes aka Conan against the beastman), then my subjective experience is, that you won´t run into the problems mentioned.
I agree with your comments about the ciggy/bathroom leave, for being a possibility to leave the darkness imposed by the portrayed situation. But one thing I always do is to recap a session, and may it be two weeks later for the next one, and ask my players about their impressions. Sometimes short, sometimes it eats up a lot of gaming time, but in the end it pays out - feedback.
And one thing I ask myself as an old grumpy guy: Why are people always feeling to have the need to carry their cross in front of them and let others feel sorry on occasions that are supposed to be fun? I feel bad about people suffering from the hands of others, I hate injustice and I hate violence against weak beings of all kinds. But when you run your games in a halfway decent manner and avoid certain things, than it is still a leisure time for everybody.
and BTW @S'mon: In my view still a way to express the situation, but I am totally with you when presented to people (especially women9 you are not too familiar with. Always a walk on the edge of the blade.
 

Yeah, that's why I went back and edited my post to sound less victim blame-y. Emotional bleed isn't something a person can control (though how they react to it is, sometimes).

I agree that putting the two topics together does make the discussion a thorny one. But there is overlap between the two topics - consideration of your players' emotional states and reactions to subject matter is, I think, central to both.

The examples I'm getting are things that are entirely unlike each other. In fact, some of them even feel like they might be abusive, in that I can see people manipulating the term to suggest that the victim is the one at fault for feeling "bleed". Indeed, I can see hints of victim self-blame in some of the examples that were linked to, and that's not cool.

Beyond that, I think mixing the already controversial ideas of "bleed" up with the equally controversial topic of "consent" does neither topic any favors. Bleed can occur independently of consent. Consent violations can occur independently of bleed. The two things aren't really strongly related in my opinion.
 

Decades ago people watched western movies where the indians (native Northamericans) were the bad guys. Today the vision about this matter is different. In a future fiction where the antagonist is a Catholic bishop or cardenal, for example "the hunchback of Notre Dame" will be politically incorrect.

Sometimes reading World of Darkness is really annoying when they show their own point of view, their prejudices, when they want to teach about History but they forget a lot of facts, of preaching about tolerance and respect but they forget to defend the respect of human dignity.

Other example is "7th Sea" with Castilla, with all cliches and stereotypes about anti-Catholic and anti-Spanish black legend.

I can allow some things in the story, but only "off-screen", for example about sexual predators looking for underage teens.
 


Celebrim

Legend
Not really: Consent of the governed - Wikipedia it is from concepts of governance that is very relevant to game mastering.

If in fact the document stirring up all this controversy was rooted in the writings of John Locke, and not, as is actually the case, drawing the specifics of its language from practices around sexual consent in BDSM situations and sexual consent in the context of larger social conversation around sexual consent on campuses, affirmative consent, the #metoo movement, and so forth then you might actually have a point. But the title "Consent in Gaming" didn't come out of having just read John Locke's 'Essay concerning Human Understanding'. They are quite obviously treating all consent in gaming in this context as a medical/health issue and quite obviously appropriating language from the larger cultural discussion around sexual consent, not the least of which seems to be because the industry is dealing with sexual harassment and at the same time there are at the same time groups that want to make erotic content a part of their gaming. I protest however that not all issues of gaming together recreational need to be lumped together under this umbrella of "consent". That is to say, people's desire for emotionally and sometimes physically risky play, and predatory and inappropriate behavior at conventions, and the ordinary issues of playing together at a table involve particulars unique to those cases and lumping how we ought to handle them all together doesn't produce more effective solutions - but rather less effective solutions and less effective discussion about those solutions.
 

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