[Spaceship Zero] Q-Ship (actually updated 19 May 2007)

[Capellan]

"The Targ Totality" - Part 1

The Pathfinder hangs in space, over the great orange bulk of Jupiter.

"Here we are." Captain John Fury spins in his command chair, to face the rest of his small crew, "the only natural source of Xenon in the solar system. Back home, there'd be a dozen mining ships down there -" he gestures at the swirling red and orange mists of the planet, "- and as many fuelling platforms out here for us to refill the ship's tanks. Obviously that's not going to happen here, so ... Doc, I'm hoping you'll live up to that 'genius' tag?"

"Archie and I haf been analysing ze schematics for zese ozzer vessels in ze ship's database." Gustav pushes his spectacles up his nose and taps a screen that Fury can't see, "I believe we haf developed ze way to extract ze Xenon for ourselves, and also to protect us from ze crushing forces of Jupiter."

"Crushing forces?" S'Ondra asks. Her foster-father nods, and absently pats her hand,

"To collect ze Xenon, we must enter into the gas storms of Jupiter itself. Ze forces zere would tear a ship like ze Pathfinder to pieces within seconds, if it is not properly shielded."

Fury nods,

"If we go in like this, we won't live long enough to regret it. So Doc, what have you boffins come up with?"

"Archie will modify ze sampling arm so zat we can deploy it to extract Xenon." Gustav explains, "And I vill recalibrate ze ship's shields to protect us from ze turbulent atmosphere."

Fury looks impressed,

"You can do that? With a ship this size? We'll have to keep your notes for when we get back home. Space Force will be interested in shield technology like that!"

"Perhaps not, Captain." Gustav demurs, "Although the recalibrated shields will protect us from ze effects of ze atmosphere, in zis configuration zey will offer no protection from missiles or atomic energy beams."

Fury's eyes goggle momentarily at the thought of being unprotected from weapons fire, and then he sighs.

"I guess we don't have any choice. And it's not like there's anyone out there to take shots at us." He sighs again, evidently disappointed by that thought, "What about gravity? Will we still have that?"

"Internal gravity will be a fractionally lower than normal." Archie replies, "But you should not notice any discomfort. Especially as you will be occupied with piloting us through the poisonous gases and violent electrical storms that are common within the planet. One false move would get us all killed."

"I'm sure the Captain will do just fine at fiddling with his joystick." S'Ondra opines, and we go to the credits with that thought fresh in our minds.

We fade back in as the crew buckles themselves into their chairs. All four look tense (and a tense robot is something to see), as Fury flicks switches on the console in front of him.

"All engines online," he reports, then turns a dial, "Ready for shields, Doctor."

"Engaging." Gustav slides several gauges up to their maximum settings, then pulls down on a lever to his left. There is a high-pitched whine, and slight flickering of the space visible through the cockpit window. "Shields online and stable. I believe ve are ready for entry."

"I'm always ready for entry, old boy." Fury assures the Doctor.

The Pathfinder leaps forward, angling down into the orange and crimson mists of Jupiter. Within seconds, it is lost to sight.

"Hang on folks, this is likely to get a bit bumpy!" Fury holds on firmly to the control stick as the ship cuts through the gaseous mass of Jupiter. There are flashes of light and rumbles of thunder in the distant clouds, and the ship lurches, the crew swaying first one way, then the other.

"Deploying Xenon Scoop." Archie intones, and the vessel's extraction arm emerges with a whirr of hydraulic power. "Xenon tanks filling ... estimate seventeen minutes until full capacity achieved."

The Pathfinder flies on, bucking and diving in the turbulent mists.

"Capacity reached." Archie reports at last. Fury, jaw clenched as he fights to keep the vessel under control, manages a acknowledging nod,

"Pulling out." He draws back on the control stick and the ship's nose comes up, angling toward the planet's surface.

"Energy spike! Energy spike!" Gustav shouts, "All stop, Captain! All stop!"

"All stop." Fury confirms, slamming buttons on the console power grid, "Talk to me, Doc."

"Ze energy spike is not from us." Gustav reports, hands flying across his own console, "It is from above Jupiter. Archie?"

"Bringing it on visual." The robot affirms.

Just beyond Jupiter's surface, the fabric of space warps and twists, then tears open in a blinding flash. Something huge begins to loom out of the rupture, and as the camera pulls back, we can see it is an enormous ship, studded with strange bulges and protrusions. At the front of the vessel is a massive globe, with a black opening near its base. Lights gleam along the length of the ship.

And what a length it is: the ship keeps coming, more and more of its grey bulk emerging from the tear in space, the front of the craft disappearing out of sot. Yet still there is no end to it, the vessel thickening around its waist as gigantic hangars bulge out from the sides. Then the hangars are done, and finally the rear of the vessel appears; enormous, crackling engines aglow.

"It's eight miles long, Captain." Archie reports, "Mass readings off the scale. I estimate the number of cleaning staff required for a vessel of this size to be two hundred and fourteen."

There is a blast of static from the the Pathfinder's radio, and a harsh, mechanical voice intones: "I, Grishnag, Star Commander of the 17th Battle Fleet, claim this system in the name of the Targ Totality. All who hear this transmission must submit, or be destroyed."

 

[Plane Sailing]

"It's eight miles long, Captain." Archie reports, "Mass readings off the scale. I estimate the number of cleaning staff required for a vessel of this size to be two hundred and fourteen."

I always enjoy the double entendres, but this archie-ism made me laugh out loud!

Cheers

 

[dpdx]

I bet Fury pulls a "D'oh - did you hear anything? I didn't hear anything."

 

[Capellan]

"The Targ Totality" - Part 2

Fury reaches for the communications switch, his first instinct to challenge these intruders in the name of Space Force.

"I do not think that would be wise, Captain." Archie suggests firmly, "The broadcast is on all frequencies. The vessel does not appear to be aware of our presence."

"How can they not know we're here?" Fury's brow wrinkles manfully, "They're right on top of us!"

"The fact that we are inside Jupiter itself is masking our presence." Archie explains, "Additionally, their sensors are running on passive mode only. Were they active, I am sure they would find us."

"Damn fool thing for them to come swanning in here claiming the entire system as theirs, and then nor have their sensors up." Fury shakes his head, "It's like putting on a blindfold, walking out your front the door, and yelling that you can beat up anyone in the street."

"It is rather unusual behaviour." Gustav agrees, then frowns, "Unless ..."

"Got a theory, Doc?"

"Ja, but I would like more information in order to confirm its truth." Gustav taps a few keys on the console in front of him, "Can we scan zem, Archie?"

"Scanning now." The robot answers. Diagnostics begin to flash onto the Doctor's screen.

"Mein Gott!" Gustav exclaims, "Ze ship is equipped with disruptor arrays!"

"Disruptors?" S'Ondra looks blank.

"They basically disassemble matter." Fury explains, "Space Force experimented with them ... back in the nineties, was it, Doc?"

"Ja, and zen banned any furzer experimentation when ze side-effects of ze technology became known."

"Side effects?" It's Fury's turn to look nonplussed.

"As you say, ze disruptors disassemble matter. Unfortunately, zey do not do zis just at the point of impact, but all along ze beam of ze weapon." Gustav punches a computer simulation up onto each person's console, It shows an animation of a blocky human figure firing a white beam of energy. "Each time ze disruptor is fired, it tears a small part of ze space-time continuum. If enough of zem are fired in ze same area -" the animation fires again and again and again, and suddenly the entire screen turns white, "- ze continuum in zat area will collapse, causing ze annihilation of all matter within ze range of effect - several miles in ze case of a personal weapon. Much more in ze case of a vessel of zis size."

Fury whistles softly,

"Nasty. And these 'Targ' have one of these disruptors?"

"Zey have over two hundred of them."

Fury's lips are suddenly a little too dry to whistle.

"Maybe they don't know about the side-effects?" S'Ondra suggests.

"I doubt zat very much, leibchen." Gustav shakes his head, "Ze means by which zey arrived was, in essence, a deliberate instance of one of zese singularities. It appears zey have found some way to pass through ze event horizon, and travel vast distances in ze process."

"So their method of interstellar travel destroys a small part of the universe every time it is used." Archie summarises, "Is that better or worse than misplacing the entire universe?"

Gustav, attention back on the giant vessel, is oblivious to the robot's comment.

"They're heading toward Earth." Fury observes, bringing up a display of the solar system with all nine planets in a nice, evenly spaced row, "Do you want me to follow them, Doc?"

"Can you do so wizzout being spotted?"

"They don't call me the best pilot in Space Force for nothing."

The Pathfinder trails the massive vessel inwards through the solar system. Fury hangs well back from the Targ ship, and plots his course in such a way that there is always a planet between the smaller craft and the vessel it is tracking.

"Zis will protect us from detection." Gustav explains to S'Ondra, "Because ze Pathfinder is small. Ze Targ ship is so large, we can still sense it, even with ze planet in ze way."

"It's not how big it is that matters, it's what you do with what you've got." Fury adds.

"Keep telling yourself that, Captain." S'Ondra mutters. When Fury shoots her a look, she colours a little and says, defensively, "How many disruptors do we have?"

Eventually, the Pathfinder hangs quietly on the dark side of the moon, as the vast Targ ship moves into orbit above the Earth. Fury feathers the ship's controls lightly, then cuts the engines.

"Now we've got a line of sight on that monstrosity." He magnifies the image on his console screen, though it really isn’t necessary, "But unless he goes to active sensors, he'll never pick us out against the moon."

There is a blast of static from the the Pathfinder's radio once more, and that same harsh, mechanical voice intones: "I, Grishnag, Star Commander of the 17th Battle Fleet, claim this system in the name of the Targ Totality. All who hear this transmission must submit, or be destroyed."

"Repetitive fellow, isn't he?" Fury observes.

Not surprisingly, there is no answer from the mould-choked planet.

"Something's happening." S'Ondra points at the front of the Targ vessel. Sure enough, there is a faint glow in the once black aperture at the bow. Slowly, the glow brightens, then there is a sudden whump and giant yellow globule flies out of the ship's nose, and speeds down toward the surface.

"Archie, scan zat please."

"Magnetically-bonded protoplasmic globule. Mass one point eight tons. Composition unknown."

The aperture glows again and again, and series of globules follows the first, flashing down toward the Earth. Each strikes in the England, Scotland or Ireland.

"What are they attacking?" S'Ondra asks, "There's nothing alive down there."

"Zere is one thing." Gustav reminds her.

"A chemical reaction is occurring at the point of impact." Archie announces, "The mould is decomposing, leaving an oily residue. Now the residue is breaking down ... it's leaving only trace elements. A fine bit of cleaning."

"How fast is ze reaction occurring?"

"I would estimate that the entire British Isles will be clear within the hour."

"An alien ship turns up, broadcasting in English, yet so confident zat zere will be no threat to it, zat it does not even have active sensors in operation." Gustav muses, "Zen it just happens to have a weapon specifically designed to destroy ze very thing zat annihilated ze civilisation of zis Earth."

"Seems a tad ... convenient." Fury manages to make 'convenient' sound like one of the seven deadly sins.

Gustav nods,

"I zink we haf found ze persons responsible for ze destruction of ze human race in zis reality."

"So what do we do about it?" S'Ondra asks.

"There's only one thing we can do." Fury rises to his feet and puts one hand on his atomic pistol, "We have to find a way to destroy that ship!"

 

[the Jester]

Wow, I decide to check out the tv for once and look how lucky I get- an episode I haven't seen before!

Yay for the BBC Sci-Fi goodness!

 

[Capellan]

"The Targ Totality" - Part 3

"Great plan." S'Ondra snorts, "I'll take the four miles on the left, you take the four miles on the right."

"I do not zink we have ze means to destroy ze alien vessel." Gustav replies in a more agreeable tone, "At least, not in any way zat would not endanger ze entire solar system."

Fury ... well, on anyone else the expression would be 'pouts', but the Captain's too manly for that, so we'll say 'scowls';

"We have to do something."

"Indeed." Gustav agrees, "And vat I propose we do is attempt to get aboard ze alien craft, and acquire ze formula for ze compound which zey have used to destroy ze mould. Zis will allow us to protect our own Earth from ze fate of zis one, when we return home."

"And until then, we can use it to protect the Venusians, here." S'Ondra adds.

Fury nods slowly,

"So the question becomes one of how we get aboard." He frowns, "Even with their sensors on passive, they'll spot the Pathfinder if we get too close. The only reason they haven't seen us so far is that we've been sticking close to planets. We can't exactly stroll up and knock on their front door."

"A small craft just launched from the mother ship, and is heading toward the surface." Archie announces.

Fury punches the Targ shuttle up on his display, then zooms back to frame the larger vessel and the Earth in the shot as well.

"The mother ship is in a geo-synchronous orbit." He mutters, "If we wait behind the moon for ... six hours ... they'll be out of sensor arcs to pick us up. We could fly down to Earth. But by then the shuttle could have gone anywhere."

"Zey are in geo-synchronous orbit above ze area of ze surface which zey have cleared." Gustav observes, "It seems likely to me zat ze cleared area is where zet intend to land, and vill be ze point from which ze shuttle travels to and from ze larger vessel."

S'Ondra nods fiercely,

"They shall be like the Ortwog, using the same path to the stream every day, and we shall be the hunters, ready to spear them and bring them home for our feast."

"Princess, I like the way you think." Fury puts his hands on his hips, "Let's go spear some Ortwogs!"

The plan is put into effect. As soon as the enormous Targ vessel slips behind the curve of the Earth, Captain Fury brings all the engines up to full, plunging the Pathfinder down towards the planet's surface.

"We'll come down over India." He announces, over the soft rattle of the ship as it powers forward, engines blazing, "Then fly nape of the earth to England. As long as we stay below a few hundred feet, there's no way the alien ship will be able to spot us. Did you get a fix on where our new 'friends' set down, Archie?"

"I have plotted their landing position, Captain." The robot confirms, "And I have identified a suitable location for us to land the Pathfinder. It is an open-face mine about just under two miles from the Targ's position. The mineral deposits of the region should mask the ship's presence."

The Pathfinder swoops over a brown, mould-covered landscape, then briefly over a wide blue expanse of water,

"The Black Sea." Fury informs the others, "We'll soon be flying over Germany, Doc."

"If only zere vos somebody to whom I could wave." Gustav shakes his head sadly, "Vot monsters are zese Targ, to annihilate anozzer race, like zis?"

"Don't worry, Doctor." S'Ondra pats her foster-father's shoulder, "We'll stop them from doing it again."

"I've got Dover in sight." Fury points through the viewscreen, then lifts the Pathfinder's nose so that it whistles just over the top of the white cliffs. The ground below the ship is still brown, but this is a deep, earthy shade, not like the washed-out colour of the mould.

"No sign of any remaining mould, or protoplasm." Gustav reports, "A perfect chemical reaction, leaving no residue of either sort. Quite sophisticated vork, to be used for such barbaric purposes."

The Pathfinder sets down within the rocky bowl of a quarry in Surrey.

"All conditions within one percent of Earth-normal." Gustav reports, "Levels of nitrogen and carbon are slightly elevated, but all gauges are within ze safe limits."

Archie has also been studying the readings.

"Doctor, I detect a great deal of mud. I recommend full encounter suits."

"I don't fancy trying to dodge disruptor blasts while in a suit." Fury shakes his head, "If the Doc says it's safe, we go as we are."

"It is safe."

"Except for the alien marauders, anyway." S'Ondra looks quite pleased at the thought.

"Except for them." Fury doesn't exactly look reluctant to meet the Targ, either. "Doc, you're the only one who's not armed. If I give you an atomic pistol, do you promise not to disassemble it?"

"Ja, of course." Gustav looks wounded, then curious, "Zo it vould be interesting to study ze manner in which ze beam is focussed -"

"Maybe you should just stick close to the rest of us, Doc, and keep your head down if any shooting starts." Fury glances around at the others, "Right, are we all ready? Then let's go teach these aliens not to mess with our planet."

He strides out, not sparing a backwards look.

"Ze Captain does realise ve are not going to war with zes Targ, ja Archie?"

"I will ensure he remembers, Doctor." The robot chivvies the scientist before him.

S'Ondra brings up the rear, muttering to herself as she walks out of shot,

"It's not my planet."

 

[Piratecat]

Glee!

 

[Capellan]

"The Targ Totality" - Part 4

Fury and S'Ondra crouch behind a cluster of small boulders, looking down a long slope to the Targ encampment. Three dome-like tents form a rough semicircle, while a fourth slowly assembles itself in jerky stop motion. Several figures are clustered at the opposite end of the camp, surrounding what looks like a machine-gun pit.

"Paranoid bunch." Fury notes, staring through a pair of binoculars, "They've killed everything on the planet, and they're still carrying more firepower than the Pathfinder."

"What are they wearing?" S'Ondra shades her eyes. Unlike Fury, she does not have the benefit of binoculars.

"Some kind of encounter suit, I think." Fury frowns, "It's like one of our spacesuits, but all in black with a tinted visor. I guess they must be shy."

"So how do we get past them all and onto the shuttle?" S'Ondra asks, gesturing at the blocky vehicle which sits beyond the camp. As she does so, the shuttle's engines roar into life, and it lifts into the air.

Watching the shuttle zoom off into space, Fury sighs,

"With difficulty."

With the shuttle's departure, one of the Targ still at the camp can be gesturing and pointing. As he (or possibly she ... or even it) does so, the other Targ break up into small groups.

"Two each going into the tents -" Fury holds his breath

"- and two going on patrol." S'Ondra smiles. "From the way he was pointing, they'll start out west, then circle clockwise. If we head north, we can cut them off."

Fury nods his agreement.

"Let's get Archie and the Doc."

The pair both turn, intending to leave, and almost clash heads. They pause, eyes locked, lips only inches apart.

"Sorry." Fury manages at last, "Ladies first."

S'Ondra gives him her best regal nod, the effect spoiled somewhat by the flushed colour of her face, and quickly scrambles away, crouched at the waist to avoid being seen.

It's a tough job following a beautiful woman in that position, but Fury's the man to do it.

Through the wonders of TV continuity, we cut to the full Q-Ship crew, lurking in ditches on either side of a small dirt track. S'Ondra and Gustav are one side of the track, while Fury and Archie crouch on the other.

"This is most unsanitary." The robot frets.

"Quiet, or I'll turn you off." Fury points down the track. "Here they come."

Viewing the Targ up close for the first time, we see that they are indeed dressed in full black body suits. The basic suits are fairly form-fitting, but the Targ wear bulky helmets and armoured vests over the top of them, while tubing runs from the vest to their gloves and boots. Both Targ carry black guns with large, diamond-shaped muzzles.

As the Targ pass between the two groups of Q-Shippers, the ambush is sprung. The scuffle is over quickly: the two aliens are surprised, and when you get hit by a 700 lb. robot, you stay hit.

Still in their encounter suits, the unconscious Targ are bound with steel cables. After a few minutes, they start to come around,

"What do you think you're doing, Primitive?" the first snarls at Fury, struggling futilely against his bonds.

"I'm the one with the disruptor." Fury hefts the weapon, taken from the two now-helpless Targ, "I'll ask the questions. Why have you come to this planet?"

"To claim it in the name of the Targ Totality. All who stand against us will be destroyed -"

"We already heard that speech from your commander." S'Ondra jabs the alien in the chest with the butt of her heat lance, "Did your people send the mould that destroyed this world?"

"Of course."

Fury snarls wordlessly, then gets his feelings under control. The questioning continues: the crew of the Pathfinder learn that the aliens' suits are fully self-contained environments, providing air for them to breathe, as well as food and water to drink, for up to a week at a time. Although the two Targ don't know when their shuttle will return, they are confident it will.

"They will bring more of our people, so we can colonise this planet. There are thousands of warriors aboard the Dreadnought!"

"Do they all fight as badly as you?" S'Ondra asks.

"You will be destroyed!" the Targ replies, "The Totality owns hundreds of planets! We have dozens of fleets! Our vessel is the most powerful battle fortress in this system!"

"Only because zere are no ozzer battle fortresses in zis system," Gustav observes, primly.

"Doc, you're not helping." Fury turns back to the aliens. "If you're coming to colonise, does that mean you have women aboard the ship?"

"Women?" the Targ's tone is confused.

"Yes, women." Fury gestures vaguely, "You know the drill. Boy meets girl. They love each other very much -"

"Disgusting!" the second alien bursts out, "You mean breed? Like animals?"

"I think you'd like it if you tried it." Fury looks smug.

"We're wasting time." S'Ondra quickly tires of Fury's efforts to learn if there are any hot Targ babes. "Let's put two of us in their suits, go back to the camp, and hijack the next shuttle that comes down."

 

[Fade]

"Ze Captain does realise ve are not going to war with zes Targ, ja Archie?"

"I will ensure he remembers, Doctor." The robot chivvies the scientist before him.

S'Ondra brings up the rear, muttering to herself as she walks out of shot,

"It's not my planet."

.

 

[ledded]

Oh, happy HAPPY dance for the update goodness.