Stupidest things PCs/DMs have done

[Lalalei2001]

This PC's stupid move led to the death of the other party members as well....

Lt. Jack Frost was being smuggled in a cargo plane to an unknown destination. Mid-flight, he decided to check his altitude so he opened the cargo bay doors to look out. Needless to say, he went *splat*.

The cargo plane lost altitude due to the open cargo bay. Several PCs (Valkyrie Pilots) attempted to stablize the plane. One clipped his wings trying to fly inside the cargo area to close it from inside. Another got hit by the overhang. Both failed their crashing rolls and died.

 

[Raloc]

The PCs in my campaign had been hired by the Calimport Thieves' Guild to investigate disappearances of their members near the Upperdark where the Calimport Muzaad meets the Underdark. After some small difficulty they made their way underground and were able to find a small outpost in some cavern. They decided to sneak into the main towers, invisible. So, they go in, grapple their way up the tower. Their invisibility is about to wear off, so the elf necromancer (who cast it) leaves and goes back to safety, leaving the others in the top room of this tower. The other party members mess around for a little while, searching the rooms and whatnot. Eventually, they decide to leave. The best route out is deemed to be for the wizard to cast a disguise self as a drow priestess, and take the other two as prisoners on her way out. The other characters think he's nuts, so they grapple back down the side of the building and start sneaking out of the cavern (towards where the necro was). The wizard proceeds to disguise himself and head down the flight of stairs. In my campaign, Drow as a language is a dialect of Elven (which, none of the chars happen to know). So, he's heading down stairs and he passes a group of drow soldiers playing dice and cards. They say something to him (something along the lines of, "Where's the soldier on duty up stairs?" (dead, since the players found him in the first topmost room)) and point upstairs. The player wasn't paying particular attention, and had his character RUN down the stairs. Naturally the soldiers told him to hold up, and he didn't, so they chased. Well, suffice it to say they basically alterted the entire garrison, and had wizards and clerics chasing them, and they *nearly* killed the party's fighter (who is the wizard's in game cousin, both from Thay) before they made it to the portal that they came through. It was all very comical from my point of view.

 

[Lalalei2001]

Raloc, that one's very funny

Any more?

 

[donremus]

I once played a rogue who found himself alone and on the wrong side of a locked door in a room containing a horde of shadows, a lich and a blue goblin. The other players chanted 'not the blue goblin?!' I didn't have a clue what they meant but it scared me witless, more than the lich! In the middle of the room was a well. I was high level and won initiative so decided to tumble past the baddies and jump into the well that was surrounded by the shadows.

I passed my roll with ease and acrobatically landed in the well....the water was only a foot deep and at floor level. I was shredded by the bad guys 1st round lol.

 

[Lalalei2001]

Donremus, did the dreaded blue goblin deliver the killing blow?

 

[donremus]

No as I recall he just laughed and let his minions do it

I never did find out about the goblin, I had only just joined that particular campaign but he obviously had a history with the other party members.

 

[KrazyHades]

Nope. Critical misses are only for saves and attacks, unless you houseruled it differently.

It's not technically a "critical failure", but we rule that the more extreme the roll, the more extreme the results in that direction (although usually that means the description is cooler but with no effect on gameplay). In this case his rolls were bad enough to justify this, IMO.

 

[KrazyHades]

This one happened just today in my new campaign. One of the PCs (lvl 3 Druid) found a flask full of red liquid. The flask feels warm to the touch, and the liquid seems to be boiling at a slow rate. Now, just after finding the flask (which is still in the druid's hand), a pair of hobgoblins burst into the room. The Druid, not wanting to throw the potion and risk damaging it, chooses to quaff it because (and I quote) "what the hell. I'd lose it if I threw it, and its a POTION, so it has to be good for me, right?". The rest of the party agreed with this idea, so he quaffs to potion. And then...BOOM! He explodes, body parts all over the room.

The flask contained alchemists fire

Moral of the story: Not all liquids are meant to be imbibed

 

[WhatGravitas]

Stupidest things one of my PCs have done? In a campaign I've DM'ed (3.0) for a first-time player, although the campaign was in its 2nd month and the players reached level 7.

Battling through a cave with a orc army - a very stupid dungeon crawl, but the best I could produce on the fly. They kill the orc chieftain... and Eberk the Dwarf (Fighter 7) takes the chieftain's head. They go back, meeting three orcs. The cleric and wizard are low on spells, the ranger watches the rear of the group. Then Eberk charges into the orcs, yelling "I've killed your chieftain, now I'll kill you!". Next round, the four orcs fly into Barbarian rage, and full attack him (since he charged right into the middle of the orcs) - downing him to -7 hp. He died three rounds later.

Then some months later:
Eberk the Dwarven Defender (Fighter 8/Dwarven Defender 5) and the rest of the group infiltrate a Lich's dungeon. They hid behind a bottleneck in the dungeon, knowing that the Lich will blast'em, as soon as they show themselves. Cleric and Wizard want to start buffing, but Eberk says "Eh, it's a Lich. He'll use necromancy, we dwarves are pretty strong, I'll take the hit, then you can blast him!"
One round and a Disintegrate (this was 3.0) later, there was only a small pile of dust.

Then, some month later, near the conclusion of the campaign:
The group was now embroiled in a coup, delivering the "death" blow to one of Nerull's personal servant (An advanced, unique balor). The group (now level 20) defeated him... and forced Nerull indirectly to negotiate with the Gods of Light. Nerull has sworn to leave the PCs in peace, and gives them - with an ironic smirk - a gift.
They open it, finding a perfectly black sphere. Eberk (again) dons hiscloak of resistence +5 and commands the (very annoyed) cleric to buff him with everything boosting saves - everyone is puzzled, then... he grabs into the sphere to find out what's inside - suddenly everybody yells no, and the dwarf says "It's okay, there should be something important... and I've enough diamonds to let you resurrect me!"
Sphere of Annihilation.
______________________________

This dwarf was RP'd as a stout, valiant and proud defender of his nation. But seemingly his heroism equalled his foolishness... - gave me a hard time *sigh*

 

[William drake]

sending a letter to the cleric which you were comming to kill, then, once you got there as the thief, you drew you offered the cleric a choice "by my sword" showing it to the cleric, in his church, armed with a few guards, countless witnesses, and other servants, "or this" showing him a cup of poision which you've made into a tea blend.

Someones seen way to many anime movies....*he thought he was a ninja* to bad, the cleric had magic and put the hurt on him.

oh, later, whe moving through a trible/barbarian village, he was still wearing his SKULL MASK, it was very early in the morning, and yes, he always wore BLACK.
One player then said once meeting him, "hey, would you take that off?"
"why," the ninja replied.
"because your bothering the people, and they look like they dont eat just cows."
He then took off the mask only to show that underneath there was a second mask, it was all black.
at this point, the player then said "wel, he's not going to last long" Everyone laughed.