Stupidest things PCs/DMs have done
- Thread starter Lalalei2001
- Start date
How about "Showed up for the game in the first place."
Here's a somewhat funny situation that ended up happening to one of my characters. (actually probably my favorite character I've ever made)
Sorry for the length, if I knew how to do the Spoiler thing I'd stick it in one of those....
Garrett Blackhand, Halfling Fighter/Master Thrower
To preface the story here I should mention Garrett was Chaotic Neutral. He generally did the "right thing" although usually not for the right reasons. More than anything he wanted Fame, he wanted to be the world next big hero that was spoken about in legends for years to come.....
So anyways a female NPC who traveled with us was grabbed earlier in an adventure and taken to the enemy's camp. (it should probably be noted now that my character had been constantly trying to get into this girls pants, he had a thing for human girls.) The leader of the group was a Cleric, that was capturing people who were able to be "attuned" to his way of thinking, thus creating a subservient army of faithful followers, which is what he was planning on doing to this girl. the party snuck in ok, but all hell broke lose as we disturbed the ritual. there were several prisoners whom were tied up, and several clerics and guards in the main tent of the camp. as the fight broke out the leader summoned an earth elemental and took our npc ally and attempted to escape. Me being the hero I decided to follow them breaking one of D&D's sacred rules. (never separate the party)
I caught up to the BBEG in the forest, after the earth elemental had been released, however he had rounded up a few guards on his way out of the encampment. leaving a balanced fight of 9 baddies vs 1 awesome hero..... The cleric screamed to the guards "get him". I stood still weapons away staring at him, and told him he was a weakling, who couldn't fight for himself, and challenged him to a one on one fight which ended up going like this....
Garrett wins initiative.
Garrett: I throw two daggers at him (both hit)
BBEG: I cast Blindness (Garrett fails his save)
Garrett: I throw two daggers at where I remember him being (one hits)
BBEG: Cast Deafness (Garrett fails his save) and BBEG 5 foot steps to the side
Garrett: pulls out another dagger and charges the spot where BBEG was... Unfortunately he miscalculates the distance, and runs face first into a tree.
Bad Guys: Promptly tie up Garrett, and leaves him sitting in the woods by himself, not being evil they don't have any reason to kill him.
Garrett ends up escaping the bonds, but seeing as he can't see or hear anything he finds a tree and sits against it waiting holding a light mace.
Thankfully the party (with help from the ranger) find Garrett Sitting against a tree alone not responding to seeing them, or hearing any of their questions. The cleric decides to help Garrett stand up, which results in Garrett clubbing him in the side with the mace when he grabs him.
The party not sure what's going on, but realizing that Garret can't see, and are assuming he can't hear either try to subdue Garrett. (who knocks the mage and cleric unconscious in the struggle. but is eventually knocked unconscious via subdual damage and tied up.
The cleric says he can remove the curses Garrett has, but not until the following day. But all Garrett knows is he was captured, and these fiends were leading him somewhere.
Garrett comes to after being healed by the cleric and A few hours later escapes his bonds again, and attempts to run away at full speed through the forest. "SMACK" right into a tree. The Ranger this time Grapples and pins Garrett holding him down, and decide they need to find a way to him know who they are. The ranger traces the word "Friend" in his hand one letter at a time, and Garrett with a good INT check recognizes what he's writing, and responds with "Who the F... are you?" he writes his name in my hand 3 times before I get it, but when I know who they are I stand up and say, "why the hell didn't you say so in the first place."
A day later I'm back to normal, although the cleric is apparently a bit pissed at me....
Sorry for the length, if I knew how to do the Spoiler thing I'd stick it in one of those....
Garrett Blackhand, Halfling Fighter/Master Thrower
To preface the story here I should mention Garrett was Chaotic Neutral. He generally did the "right thing" although usually not for the right reasons. More than anything he wanted Fame, he wanted to be the world next big hero that was spoken about in legends for years to come.....
So anyways a female NPC who traveled with us was grabbed earlier in an adventure and taken to the enemy's camp. (it should probably be noted now that my character had been constantly trying to get into this girls pants, he had a thing for human girls.) The leader of the group was a Cleric, that was capturing people who were able to be "attuned" to his way of thinking, thus creating a subservient army of faithful followers, which is what he was planning on doing to this girl. the party snuck in ok, but all hell broke lose as we disturbed the ritual. there were several prisoners whom were tied up, and several clerics and guards in the main tent of the camp. as the fight broke out the leader summoned an earth elemental and took our npc ally and attempted to escape. Me being the hero I decided to follow them breaking one of D&D's sacred rules. (never separate the party)
I caught up to the BBEG in the forest, after the earth elemental had been released, however he had rounded up a few guards on his way out of the encampment. leaving a balanced fight of 9 baddies vs 1 awesome hero..... The cleric screamed to the guards "get him". I stood still weapons away staring at him, and told him he was a weakling, who couldn't fight for himself, and challenged him to a one on one fight which ended up going like this....
Garrett wins initiative.
Garrett: I throw two daggers at him (both hit)
BBEG: I cast Blindness (Garrett fails his save)
Garrett: I throw two daggers at where I remember him being (one hits)
BBEG: Cast Deafness (Garrett fails his save) and BBEG 5 foot steps to the side
Garrett: pulls out another dagger and charges the spot where BBEG was... Unfortunately he miscalculates the distance, and runs face first into a tree.
Bad Guys: Promptly tie up Garrett, and leaves him sitting in the woods by himself, not being evil they don't have any reason to kill him.
Garrett ends up escaping the bonds, but seeing as he can't see or hear anything he finds a tree and sits against it waiting holding a light mace.
Thankfully the party (with help from the ranger) find Garrett Sitting against a tree alone not responding to seeing them, or hearing any of their questions. The cleric decides to help Garrett stand up, which results in Garrett clubbing him in the side with the mace when he grabs him.
The party not sure what's going on, but realizing that Garret can't see, and are assuming he can't hear either try to subdue Garrett. (who knocks the mage and cleric unconscious in the struggle. but is eventually knocked unconscious via subdual damage and tied up.
The cleric says he can remove the curses Garrett has, but not until the following day. But all Garrett knows is he was captured, and these fiends were leading him somewhere.
Garrett comes to after being healed by the cleric and A few hours later escapes his bonds again, and attempts to run away at full speed through the forest. "SMACK" right into a tree. The Ranger this time Grapples and pins Garrett holding him down, and decide they need to find a way to him know who they are. The ranger traces the word "Friend" in his hand one letter at a time, and Garrett with a good INT check recognizes what he's writing, and responds with "Who the F... are you?" he writes his name in my hand 3 times before I get it, but when I know who they are I stand up and say, "why the hell didn't you say so in the first place."
A day later I'm back to normal, although the cleric is apparently a bit pissed at me....
prospero63
First Post
I believe one of the stupider is shortly forthcoming.
New player is brining in a necromancer... into a party who one of the party leaders is a cleric of Pelor... It's going to make for an interesting session. I wonder what his backup character is...
New player is brining in a necromancer... into a party who one of the party leaders is a cleric of Pelor... It's going to make for an interesting session. I wonder what his backup character is...
prospero63
First Post
Back in 2nd Edition, we had an NPC in the party with his "trouble stick". It was a wand of wonder. We'd get into a bind and hear the words "trouble stick, don't fail me now". Sometimes it worked. Other times, a lightning bolt killed a party member... good times... 
prospero63
First Post
We also had a situation where a new character was coming into the party. The party had an itchy trigger finger. The player confronts the party. They are at the proverbial "mexican standoff". He's being told not to make any sudden movements, etc. One of the party, a pixie, has manuevered in close to him, just in case flanking is required. He hears the pixie flying, and swings his sword - not like a combat swing, but like one might swat at a fly. My guy pounces on him in reaction to him making sudden movements and through a number of good rolls, he had to bring in a new character.
hornedturtle
First Post
We were in this flying complex and all of the characters had their memories wiped at the very beginning. Well it turned out that half of the characters had been sent there to capture the leader of the "resistance". My character had mostly figured out that he and another character were in opposition (the other character was telling people things off to the side but not my character). The other guy still had his memories. In the very last session of the game, when it became apparent i don't trust him, he charm's my character with his bardic abilities. So that later in the day when the group leaves the complex and regains their memories i am still charmed into helping him fight my previous boss and overthrowing the empire. Then the bard uses his abilities to mentally enslave the entire nation. and he wasn't even the leader.
I mean sure my boss was committing genocide but at least you could choose death instead.
I mean sure my boss was committing genocide but at least you could choose death instead.
Lalalei2001
Explorer
There was a greedy, stupid dwarf in our party who wished for a mountain of solid gold. It was only luck (and a contingency spell that teleported me to a safe location whenever a wish was used within 20 feet of me) that my wizard survived.
The whole party and a nearby villiage was totally flattened. It took me a week to return to the site of the mountain and by the time I got there, there were already over 10 dwarven clans duking it out over the mountain.
In the end there was a "world war" over the mountain as it represented the sum of all the gold, everywhere.
That campaign actually ended with the destruction of all life on the planet. I tell you, magic is WAY worse than nukes!
The whole party and a nearby villiage was totally flattened. It took me a week to return to the site of the mountain and by the time I got there, there were already over 10 dwarven clans duking it out over the mountain.
In the end there was a "world war" over the mountain as it represented the sum of all the gold, everywhere.
That campaign actually ended with the destruction of all life on the planet. I tell you, magic is WAY worse than nukes!
Lalalei2001
Explorer
Well this is a stupid DM thread now, too ^_^
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