Suggestions for ending a campaign in 10 easy steps?

[RandomUsernamehmimo71]

For reasons I'd rather not get into, I'm going to have to be ending a campaign that I've been running.. I know it's a bit childish, but I'd like to take the opportunity to see how far I can push things, before the players will just get up from the table.

We're all good friends, and we've been through worse, and they expect a bit of mischievousness out of me, so I think I'm safe, but I could use suggestions on how to do it.

What I've come up with so far, in 10 easy steps-

1. Deck of Many things
2. A plethora of minstrels to sing their deeds
3. Metrosexual Dragons
4. Fatal BBEG heart attack just before climax.
5. Repetitive Time Travel- Replay the same encounter multiple times.
6. Insisting on using contemporary references; Darth Paladin.
7. Invasion of Fey rock bands into the cities
8. Feindish Spectral half-Celestrial half-dragon half-troll feral dolphin pirates
9. "No, This BBEG is the Nephew of the Son of the first BBEG. He just LOOKS identical"
10. Insisting of roll-playing out the 200-strong combined forces Succubi and Nymph attack.

Any other suggestions?

 

[Someone]

Its all a computer VR simulation. The´re actually in the year 2047.

 

[Piratecat]

4. Fatal BBEG heart attack just before climax.

This is great! "Now, you pesky adventurers, feel free to.. err... ack!" *thump*

Imagine how off balance the PCs will feel!

 

[FrantzX]

Rocks Fall!! Everyone Dies!!

Nothing beats the classic ending.

 

[Desdichado]

10. Insisting of roll-playing out the 200-strong combined forces Succubi and Nymph attack.

Any other suggestions?

Heck, just bring the Book of Erotic Fantasy to the table, and say you've got this great book that will help take the campaign in fantastic new directions with mature and in-depth roleplaying. Turn to the picture of the pregnant orc.

If they're at all like most groups of guys I know, they'll walk away from the table right away and start talking very quickly and loudly about sports or cars or something like that. And if they don't, well after that first night, you'll probably all never be able to look each other in the eyes again, much less get together to play D&D...

 

[Desdichado]

Barring that, a classic TPK always works for me.

 

[argo]

1. Deck of Many things

That oughta do it right there.

Still, if you get through your entire list and everybody is stil at the table you can always just have a great big foot come out of nowhere and stomp them all flat

 

[frankthedm]

So are you sure you can't talk it over with them?
.... good

1. TPK may not be enough, total world kill would be better.

2. Try to set up a situation where you can get a Player to push the BIG RED BUTTON-O-DOOM

3.Nothing brings down property values like the Cthulhu Mythos showing up.

4. have the end SEEM preventble, just have it so their playstyle drives the campaine to the End of the world.

5. Have an unstable NPC jump through a one way suicide portal in veiw of the PCs. Once one goes, the rest always follow.

 

[Terwox]

3. Metrosexual Dragons
4. Fatal BBEG heart attack just before climax.

Excellence!
"And now, *spits* heroes, you will die before my TRUE FOR.. MAARGHH!" *sputters* *falls over* *hand quivers, reaching out* "..rosebud.." *falls dead*

Metrosexual dragons is great too, but I'm not doing anything with that subject.

 

[Bran Blackbyrd]

DM: Okay guys, there's a door in front of you and to your left is a hole in the floor. Which one do you want to go through?
Players: The door!
DM: Sorry guys, the swamp creature was behind that door. "Your Life and Your Quest End Here".