Swear At & Insult Your Players

[Connorsrpg]

OK I will be up front here. I started this thread under another title that was; a/ misinterpretted b/c it had 'curse' in its title & b/obviously did not have a catchy enough title b/c it is a great idea for a thread

Anyway, I am sure many GMs would appreciate a list of curses, insults, challenges and cusses.

Here is the info from the first thread:

"I have a real problem in generating cusses etc (especially off the top of my head) and too often resort to using words I would use in the modern world. This really detracts from the game. So (and I am sure there are other GMs out there that would appreciate this) I would love to hear some of your best curses and challenges used by NPCs.

Or even some references from other sources. I have actually written down a few from a Conan novel for my current campaign (set on the high seas) and they have fitted in well lately. I often recall a line from a Gary Gygax novel about Kord about being 'angrier than a wet fire elemental'. This is the sort of stuff I am after, as well as cool challenges a confident NPC may offer to PCs.

Let's start cursing (and see what we can get past the moderators )."

A few replies were forthcoming, and here they are again for reference sake:

demiurge1138 wrote:
"May ghouls feast on your entrails!"
"I'll bleed you like a stuck pig."
"Taste my blade, vermin!"
"Humans! Not worth the flesh they're printed on!"
"I will break you."
"Let's get this pretense over with."
"Die, so you may meet your ancestors in Hell."
"You will not live to regret this."

JimAde wrote:
I love this one from Pirates of the Carribean:
"Curse ya for breathin', ya slack-jawed idiot!"

Igbutron wrote:
jack, don'tcha know it's bad luck to wake a man when he's sleepin?....

ok, onto the real meat of the subject.. fun curses for the NPCs to scream at pcs...

hmm...

may you spend your afterlife chanined to a post in excrementa, the 945th layer of the abyss!

... or, if you prefer something slightly less smelly, could always go with something like:

may you forever be forced to listen to the isnane winds of pandemonium...

See, the start to a great thread

I don't mind if these are from movies or books or one's you have used in game yourself, as long as they are suitable for a 'typical' fantasy setting

(Moderators feel free to delete old thread, here: http://www.enworld.org/showthread.php?p=2531677#post2531677)

Connors

 

[Umbran]

A good curse needs to be short and quick, so you can spit it out quickly in a fight. I was always partial to, "Son of a motherless goat!"

 

[Dog Moon]

I always liked:

"I am Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

Say that a few times and it should freak them out. Heck, even if they DIDN'T kill your father, maybe it'll confuse them enough so you can catch them offguard.

[I'm not really good at coming up with those kinds of things though]

 

[MavrickWeirdo]

The short story "Somebody Else’s Magic" by Marion Zimmer Bradley actually features such a phrase (which I believe Eric's grandmother might not appreciate.)

 

[Pielorinho]

Guy Gavriel Kaye's Sailing to Sarantium is a great book with a wonderfully foulmouthed soldier in it. While none of his curses are grandma-appropriate, they'd be great for a cursing character in a fantasy game.

Daniel

 

[diaglo]

i like to swear in a foreign language. that way it may or may not be understood.


diaglo "ashek" Ooi

 

[StupidSmurf]

I always liked the curses available in Blackadder, first season, where he's been made Archbishop of Canterbury, and is reading over the list of curses available for sale to the general public. One of them was something like: "May a body part fall off at an inconvenient moment".

 

[Thotas]

There's a Conan story I read long ago, to the point I don't remember which one it is, but it has my all time favorite threat in it: "I'm going to rip your heart out and make you eat it before you die."

 

[Tinner]

Pro-Wrestling is a great source for these.

"I'm gonna stomp you flat, and walk a mud-hole in your backside!"
"You wanna fight me? You better pack a lunch and bring a friend!"
"I'll hurt you so bad you will become my painiac."
"Whatcha gonna do when (insert PC name here) runs wild on you?"
"I'm a sixty minute man, and I'm all night long! Whooooooooo!"

Err ... OK, so that last one is more of a boast than a curse, but you get the idea.

 

[Henry]

Orc-spawn!
Goblin's whore! ("Goblin-lover" for the toned-down version)
Unseelie wretch! (for an elf or fey creature)
Addle-pated fool! (actual historical insult, an "addle-pate" is someone stupid)
Ghoul-puke, Ghoul-vomit (implying even a Ghoul couldn't stomach you)