Takris presents:
If ENWorld were a Baking Site
I picked up Green Ronin's Apple Pie this week -- I've always been a big fan of Green Ronin's work, and I figured that this would be no exception. I hadn't read much about Apple Pie, but like I said, Green Ronin has such a consistent level of high quality that I figured I'd find some great ideas to incorporate no matter what it turned out to be. Well, it turned out to be more AND LESS than I was expecting. I ended up feeling like Apple Pie had a lot of potential, some really great parts in it, but is ultimately held back by some really foolish and limiting decisions, and while I really wanted to like it, I can't avoid the conclusion that Green Ronin's Apple Pie is, without a doubt, the worst quiche I have ever tasted.
The design and display were well up to Green Ronin's standards, with a package that fit a high, ten-inch plate. Green Ronin also made Apple Pie available in both oven-heated and microwavable formats, so that fans of both styles can enjoy it. And when I saw the crust, I was in heaven. This is the kind of crust I've been looking for in my quiche for years -- the perfect consistency, an exquisite taste, and a flakiness that answers a lot of my quiche needs. Even with all my other problems, I still feel like I'd gotten my money's worth out of Apple Pie, and I'll be using their crust in my future quiche-nights with my friends.
In fact, as I kept eating, I began to wonder if I could have paid Green Ronin more money just to not get anything but the crust, because they've gone and married this wonderful crust to, as I said, the worst quiche I have ever tasted. I know they said they were trying to appeal to a different market, but really, what kind of quiche-eater wants apples in his quiche? I mean, come on. Sure, a little slice of strawberry on the top, or some little bits of fruit or something -- although honestly, that's not really the kind of quiche my friends and I feel comfortable eating anyway. But this is a quiche whose filling is entirely apples, sugar, and a few spices. Where is the cheese? Where is the cream? Where are the eggs? You'll probably think I'm joking when I say that they even include a section on adding whipped cream or a scoop of vanilla ice cream to Apple Pie, as though that was just what quiche has been missing all these years.
I really tried not to be closeminded about Apple Pie, because I like all kinds of quiche. I've eaten quiche with asparagus and swiss cheese, quiche with a wide range of cheeses and no vegetables at all, and even some New Mexican quiche with green chiles and sour cream. So I'm an open-minded person. But Apple Pie is just atrocious as quiche goes. If you can stomach the apples and cinnamon and sugar to get that wonderful crust, I say go for it, but if not, then I suggest you wait and hope that Green Ronin puts out a crust-only edition sometime soon.
They're still a wonderful company and I will look carefully at anything they produce, but honestly, looking at Apple Pie, I almost have to wonder if they were even trying to make good quiche at all...