Then we simply disagree. I think (and this perspective predates my GM-ing days) that the power asymmetry between GMs and players is built into the game.
The GM does yield what one could feasibly call absolute power, and that power can only be curtailed by self-imposed temperance and good judgment. Should the GM want, he could take away all the powers of the all PCs via some magical curse, or have a Tarrasque burst through the floor and eat them, or have a portal to the Abyss swallow them, or have the Death Star blow up the planet they are currently on, or have a particular NPC appear and best them, etc. All of that would be horrible GM-ing, obviously, because the GM's role is to foster story, narrative and adventure, not to best the PCs on some equally-matched game.
When I play, I accept that I am trusting the GM to yield his unlimited powers responsibly in the interest of the shared narrative and fun adventuring. When I GM, I expect players to offer me that trust as well. I struggle to imagine a game in which this isn’t the starting point. This also isn’t too different from the trust a collaborator would place on another in other creative activities.
It's not a matter of asymmetry. I'm fine with asymmetry. Different kinds of powers, different kinds of limits.
I'm not fine with one person being given absolute total autonomy zero accountability zero responsibility zero expectations, and the other being "here are your choices: submit, or disrupt everyone else's fun by leaving." That's straight-up holding people hostage with social expectations, which is a thing I have dealt with more than once in my life and is not some strange, weird out-there thing.
Asymmetry doesn't mean one side has no limits and the other has all the limits. It means one side has its limits, and the other side has its own. There are lines, and whatever those lines are, crossing them is observable and genuinely something that people can say "hey, that's not cool, please fix this", rather than the only permitted states being completely accepting absolutely everything done, or blowing up.
Do you just flat out disagree with the trad division of power? If so, please just say that.
I mean, I don't actually know what "the trad division of power" means, so I cannot say either way.
Does it mean one side is unlimited in what it is permitted to do, while the other is beholden to both social expectations
and hard rules? Because if that's what it means, then absolutely I oppose that division of power.
Does it mean that one side has limits, and the other side also has limits, even if those limits are different? Does it mean that
both social expectations and actual rules, processes, procedures, govern each person's participation, even if those processes turn differently? Then I'm completely fine with it.
I don't expect the rules that apply to players to always apply to GMs and vice versa. But I absolutely expect that there ARE rules that apply to GMs, just as there are rules that apply to players--and that players can call it out when a GM breaks those rules, just as GMs can (and should!) call out players when players break rules.
GMs have power. A lot of it! I expect that, with that power, comes
limitations. People are so fond of talking about how limitations breed creativity. Surely that must, then, mean that a GM with unlimited power is sacrificing
their creativity? Surely GM limitations must actually force them to be creative? It can't be the case that sitting behind the GM screen magically makes limitations bad for creativity....right?