The problem with elves take 2: A severe condemnation [merged]

[DMH]

A solution to the elf food problem

Leaf cutter ants collect vegetable material from the forests they live and use them as fertilizer for fungal gardens. Why not have something similar for the elves?

Instead of fungi, they use epiphytes on every square inch of useable tree trunk and limb. Magic can boost the value of the soil and compost used to fertilize the plants. And the epiphytes themselves have been magicaly altered (or simply bred) to produce fruits and seeds in abundance.

Dwarves could be more like the ants and collect goblin bodies and elf tree roots to fertilize their gardens.

 

[Teflon Billy]

Is there an "Elf Food Probelm" I was unaware of?

 

[DMH]

I didn't want to read that long thread as most of the elf issues I don't care about. Heck, the food issue doesn't bother me either, but the idea just popped into my head and I decided to share it.

 

[Peni Griffin]

My elves are hunter-gatherers with low population density, who historically live well in forests. The dependence of modern high-density populations on agribusiness should not blind us to the fact that everything lived on wild food until recently (since the end of the most recent glacial period).

 

[phindar]

Haven't you noticed how skinny all the elves are? Mialee makes Nicole Ritchie look like body builder.

 

[jgbrowning]

Is there an "Elf Food Probelm" I was unaware of?

Yeah, they reproduce so slowly that when you kill one to eat it takes years for the crop to come back in...

joe b.

 

[Piratecat]

What is the sound of one thread merging?

 

[mmadsen]

I am conceding the debate. 3rd Edition Elves are not doomed.

It has never been my intention to "win" the debate by browbeating you but to understand what you've been trying to say. Can you succinctly state what you were arguing?

 

[fusangite]

What is the sound of one thread merging?

I vote for closing this thread and starting a happy one somewhere else. Perhaps some sort of generic discussion about world building and demi-humans.

 

[fusangite]

Is there an "Elf Food Probelm" I was unaware of?

I found that when I gamed with someone with a lot of blood sugar issues, food logistics would come up a lot in play. My player (who once stopped at the 7-11 on the way to lunch because she couldn't go a whole hour without eating) was constantly worried that the characters were as hungry as she would be in their shoes (there were minor food shortages).

So I imagine it arises at tables of guys who are fueled by constant consumption of carby snacks all day thinking about how thin and cool the elves are, and how far they are from your average brewery or deep fat fryer.