This is a Troll [meta-thread]

[Isida Kep'Tukari]

After searching the backpages of the boards, resurrects old troll topic and offers innocent opinion on the first post, ignoring all subsequent flames. Also shows off new avatar. Ends with joke amusing only to people who go to the same unversity.

 

[MerricB]

Realizes that MerricB is a good target to get a rise out of so quotes him, states that ALL CAPS is a sign of high intelligence for all people who live above the equator, and that Cheers is the name of a bar.

Explains that bold text is a sign of high intelligence south of the equator, and that bold, italic, underlined, coloured and serifed fonts are the sign of an intelligence on overload.

Explains also that if one is typing in a bar, as one is, Cheers! is an entirely appropriate salutation.

Also grumbles about Americanised spelling, their overuse of 'z' and their underuse of 'u', before wondering what the point of the original post was.

!sreehC

 

[jdavis]

stares disbelieving at the thread that wouldn't die.

Tolkien was a underated Root Beer drinker, Timothy Dalton was the best Good Drow, The best edition was the special edition, and Gilligan was doing Mrs Howell on the side.

 

[Speaker]

States that Tolkien made several allusions to "The one root beer" throughout his books, which are, of course, full of allegory to the soft drink markets, a couple world wars, and the state of our modern world.

Continues with a verbal diatribe full of pernicious and inflammatory diction. Wastes a few overly long words on the topic, most of which sound self-satisfied. Comments on how great this thread is, everyone voicing their own repressed opinions, so on and so forth. Attempts to make the previous arguments seem small and petty. Fails. Instead, marks himself as the most arrogant poster on this thread yet.

Ends with some comic relief, which no one gets. But it is funny, really!

Says Cheers, forgetting the controversy that word spawned just a few posts up in the thread.

Signs his name as the final touch of self-righteous humbug.

 

[Darrin Drader]

Congratulates self for starting "The thread that won't die." Makes a thinly veiled fascist rootbeer remark. Insists that Osama doesn't drink rootbeer at all, which is why he is such a horrible, horrible person. Agrees with nothing Speaker says, except for the humor part.

 

[Whodat]

Is so annoyed by the longevity of this thread that he posts something blatantly political, religious and controversial in a desperate attempt to get the moderators to close the thread.

Closes post with inflammatory comment, using language Eric’s grandma would not approve, in order to assure thread closure and victory!

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Is both humbled and amazed to see thread some time later, with a post from the moderators directed specifically at this post. Wonders why the moderators have banned him.

Oops!

 

[Larry Fitz]

Posts in the mistaken belief that this would be a good thread to promote latest project, Cabbages, Luminaries and Soft Drinks! A non-sequitur handbook. Tries to lure people to innappropriate link. . Makes placating comments to all sides of argument, which only serve to infuriate all involved and two or three people who would have otherwise ignored this thread. Attempts esoteric comments for insiders, while being painfully obvious that they are forced and unnatural. Ends with lame joke attempting to beatify Eric, Russ, and the original poster without referencing any of the three by name.

 

[baradtgnome]

Undead thread!

Rolls to turn thread. Fails.

Goes back to miserable existance.

 

[incognito]

Rips off recent comendian's joke: "Osama bin Laden is an Uncle Tom" - and messes up puchline such that everyone assumes his joke post was serious.

Does not care that thread will not die, becsause there is nothing better to do with one's day anyway, except play 3E, which requires at least one other friend - and is genrally frowned up in the office.

Implies a very important quote is coming, but then just copies the entire posts of several posters like this:

Rolls to turn thread. Fails.
Goes back to miserable existance.

Posts in the mistaken belief that this would be a good thread to promote latest project, Cabbages, Luminaries and Soft Drinks! A non-sequitur handbook. Tries to lure people to innappropriate link. . Makes placating comments to all sides of argument, which only serve to infuriate all involved and two or three people who would have otherwise ignored this thread. Attempts esoteric comments for insiders, while being painfully obvious that they are forced and unnatural. Ends with lame joke attempting to beatify Eric, Russ, and the original poster without referencing any of the three by name.

Is so annoyed by the longevity of this thread that he posts something blatantly political, religious and controversial in a desperate attempt to get the moderators to close the thread.

Call's One moderator a Pir-Cat clone, Claims he is Eric's grandpa, and insists he'd be the best moderator. Awaits other poster to agree. Is shocked when they don't. Starts thread in Meta about his path to becoming a moderator.

Edits to correct his pathetic HTML

 

[jdavis]

Angered that Dragon Magazine bashing thread is longer than Iconic troll thread, this thread is much more offensive and is worlds more important to global life.

Repeat every statement I have ever made but differently and with differnt types of smiley faces, admonish faithful to get back on track and back to the subject at hand, I forgot what that was but it really needs to be gotten back too