I had the exact same thought which prompted me to open a thread about whether D&D was having an identity crisis. I'm in agreement with you, had the hot bugbear-on-ogre action appeared in a module there would be quite a few of us pulling our hair, wailing, and gnashing our teeth. Nor can I imagine role playing a romance scene with dommy mommy Lae'zel in a face-to-face table top game. I never gave much thought to what a Githyanki labia might look like, but now I'll never get it out of my mind. But that's really my own faut for having the adult setting turned on for the game.
This might be a good way to illustrate the differences between playing a game alone on a computer versus face-to-face with multiple participants. What I'm comfortable with in a computer game might not be the same thing I'm comfortable with in a face-to-face game with multiple participants. I can't imagine roleplaying an NPC and commanding a PC to "taste" and then telling them to continue by going further down.
We're kinda of getting into a debate here. What's porn? Justice Stewart of the Supreme Court said in 1964, "I shall not attempt further to define the kinds of material....but I know it when I see it." Like I said, I have the adult setting turned on for BG3, and the romance scene with Lae'zel was fairly graphic. Was it pornographic? I don't think so, but your mileage may vary.