What It's Like For a Gamer Girl

[Acquana]

I'm a chick

No, seriously, I am. *checks* Yup, still a chick.

Anyhoo, I've obviously been hangin out with guys for waaaaaaay too long. Afrodyte, you're right. You just are. Everyone who's argued the point, gotten offended, etc. etc. is just doing what they do, because they are the opposite of a girl: a boy. But hey, what's so wrong with that? Nuthin.

I was told by Bob Burden (anyone ever heard of Flaming Carrot? Dat's his character) that sometimes people just act like they do and there's nothing you do or say that can change that.

I've been a tomboy my whole life, but that doesn't mean I still don't get baffled by how different guys and chicks really are. For one thing, I can get away with saying "chick." But that's beside the point.

What I mean is, guys love to offend each other, and girls generally don't. We take things personally. I've got this very, very masculine guy who's been interested in me for a long time, and he just doesn't seem to understand that when I insult him back, I generally mean it. -_-; My friend Liz used to say it was a Southern thing to insult people you like, but no, she was raised by two older brothers. It's a guy thing. You should hear my group. Rangerwickett gets the brunt of most of the meanness, the poor guy. My buddy Nic one day even started paying people a dollar for every time we hit him. I earned five bucks for a side kick! *sheepish grin*

The girl who recently joined our group just doesn't know how to handle it. She's very much a girl. Not even a "chick," a girl. And I must say it's changed the atmosphere quite a bit. It's good to have a few more breasts around. ;P Girls like to role-play more, you know, in that character interaction kind of way.

I honestly think the problem here is just that, Afrodyte, you're not as much of a guy as me. While I do bristle when I think of what you much be going through, I can't say I go through it. Mostly because I'm one of the more guy-ish people I know here at home, and when I'm at college most of the gamers are chicks. It's true! I made a note in my storyhour how I actually had trouble finding a guy willing to play with a group of five chicks.

And the guys I do play with tend to be on the low-end of masculenity. When Rangerwickett and I go shopping at Best Buy, who's drooling over the tech? Me. Rangerwickett's too busy trying to tell me stuff is to expensive. The guys in my gaming group treat me like of the guys, and I generally don't mind. At school, the guys in my group are just one of the chicks. ^_^ And they don't mind, either.

But anyway, Afrodyte ...

I mean, if you think tabletop RPG is rough, any of you boys tried to get into an email-based RPG lately? If you've been wondering where all the chicks are, they're online. And they're just as elitist as guy tabletop gamers. Seriously.

That whole genre is bizarre and full of nothing but girls who like to make poetry websites and watch girly anime. And pretty guys kissing.

So if you're feeling a sincere lack of estrogen in your life, Afrodyte, just try online gaming a bit. And insult guys back as much as you want. They won't take it personally, even if you manage to find just the right button they'll still think you're kidding and not show how hurt they are. *evil grin* BWA HA HA HA HA!!

*ahem* Just a joke there, fellas.

Anyway, I feel like throwing some meat on a grill now. *masculine grunts*

 

[Desdichado]

Careful... you can insult guys fine, but if you make RangerWickett look like a nancy boy on the message board, that's a mortal sin...

 

[Buttercup]

Re: I'm a chick

Anyhoo, I've obviously been hangin out with guys for waaaaaaay too long. Afrodyte, you're right. You just are. Everyone who's argued the point, gotten offended, etc. etc. is just doing what they do, because they are the opposite of a girl: a boy.

Nope. I'm female, and have been since the day I was born. Sorry, but your generalizations aren't any more true than Afrodyte's.

 

[sabinerak]

The problem with books like Mars-Venus, or any other book for that matter, is that they are still just one source, one opinion. They can still turn out to be helpful in that they can provide another way of looking at an issue which might just "click" better with some readers than others, but they should not be taken as an end-all, be-all kind of thing. (Not that anyone here is necessarily doing so.) Even something that turns out to be vastly erroneous could still prove helpful to someone in the sense that it still made the person think through or realize a certain issue.

Regardless of all the differences and proclaimed differences (whether true or false) between the genders, being human is a huge common bond. There's nothing "alien" about either one really. For every "women are this way" or "men are that way," numerous exceptions on both sides abound.

The person who said it is best to treat each person individually is right on the mark.

 

[Ashtal]

Damn ... my ten-foot-pole has gotten remarkably shorter these days.

I've been gaming for twenty years, and when I was younger, I found there was a lot more tension between me, a female gamer, and the other male gamers I played with - in particular a lot of the traits first described way back when this thread started. But we were all kids, and at that age, no one really knew how to deal with each other and the opposite sex on top of that. I was lucky and got to play with more girls than guys after that, but even up to my older teen years, some of the guys were morons. "You fall in love with the Paladin because his Charisma is so high. *snicker*" "Whatever."

But at the same time, I took it, not knowing how to handle it directly. I said nothing, or rolled my eyes and tried to ignore it. Really, all it does is encourage the behavior. Put your foot down.

In my early twenties, gaming changed ... probably because we all were changing, and growing up. I played with men, I played with woman, and time and again, it was their own personal preferences, above and beyond their gender, that affected and influenced our games. I approach gaming on the individual level ... and for me, it's worked. We've had thinkers, we've had power-gamers, we've had brooders, we've had romance, we've had laid back, and they've been both genders. Each person comes to the table with their own desired interests and expectations and for the people I've gamed with, gender has had little to do with figuring out a short-hand to guess what their play-style will be like.

Edit: spelling, and stuff.

 

[Acquana]

I wouldn't say that, my dear. But of course I've already described what I've seen.

Generalizations based on experience, not in a malicous way. And saying I'm flat-out wrong is a bit of a generalization on your part too, Buttercup. ;P

But you are right on a few points there, Buttercup. You're no less female for liking what you like. That and the "Virgin and the Venus" complex is fairly common among male perceptions. Take a look at Renaissence art by men and the rare pieces by women and there ya go. You'll see what I mean.

My real point to all my rambling up there is people are people, and despite what girls and guys these days are raised to believe, there's a difference! Sorry, I know it's not PC, but whatever. Girls are girls, guys and guys, and sometimes they wanna act like it. So?

The whole thing just is what it is. Poor Afrodyte made in into a group who has a tough time dealing with the difference (or maybe it's just her?), Buttercup and I are luckier.

Lord knows I'm not saying I'm right, cause heaven forbid anyone be sure of herself, but I DO think there are degrees of sex. And I also think that people change depending on where they are. I've seen it, it's not always concious. While the girl in my gaming group Texas generally acts the same everywhere she is, I've seen plenty of girls who relax and "let it all hang out" around guys. It's not like I act the way I do with my Texas gaming group the same way I would around a church girl group!

If you wanna see the battle between the sexes, you may also wanna check out comic book crowds. Rarely do I feel more feminine than when I'm in classes at art school and critiqing pieces guys have drawn. Especially the ones who read mainstream comics. Oh, brother.

Before I get into my rant on how to properly draw breasts, I'd better end this post quickly!

 

[Flexor the Mighty!]

deleted and e-mailed to Piratecat.

 

[RangerWickett]

Re: I'm a chick

No, seriously, I am. *checks* Yup, still a chick.

Yes she is. Quite a nice one, by the way. Even though she did break up with me and crush my heart beneath her callous heel eight months ago.

Still originally posted by Acquana
And the guys I do play with tend to be on the low-end of masculinity. When Rangerwickett. . . .

My my, the things you find when you do a search for your own screen name. Don't worry, she's quite right, except that I think only British people can call someone a 'nancy boy.' Actually, Jessie is too de-femininized; she ought to turn over her breasts to someone who actually deserves them, like me.

But, from what little I've read of this thread, I think perhaps being a gamer girl would be too much of a burden for me to handle.

 

[Pielorinho]

Re: Re: I'm a chick

Actually, Jessie is too de-femininized; she ought to turn over her breasts to someone who actually deserves them, like me.

Careful what you wish for. A few years back, a friend of mine won someone else's nipples in a game of poker; according to him, it's a terrible responsibility.

Of course, those were boy-nipples he won, so that may change things.

Daniel

 

[Buttercup]

And saying I'm flat-out wrong is a bit of a generalization on your part too, Buttercup. ;P

But you are flat-out wrong! You said that everyone who has argued the point was a boy. I'm not. So obviously not everyone who disagrees is a boy.

Yes, I know I'm nit-picking. But you see what I mean, surely? I only quoted that part of your post because the rest was clearly your opinion. But my gender isn't merely a matter of opinion. Really. I swear.

And you know I'm just ribbing you, right?