When disagreeing…

[Lanefan]

But you're so avuncular. How do you behave in bars?

If someone started arguing with me in a bar the way I get argued with here sometimes, the language used in my response would most certainly not be as civil as what I post here...nor perhaps as coherent, depending how long I'd already been in said bar.

A fine example of that was the one time I sprang for a VIP ticket to GenCon (can't remember now if 2009 or 2011), there was a meet-and-greet for the VIPs that involved lots of beer and, eventually, lots of yelling: five of us standing around a tall table, two vehement 3e supporters, two vehement 4e supporters, and me, banging away supporting 1e as best I could while telling all four of 'em they were nuts.

At one point Peter Adkison (then - and still? - owner of GenCon) stopped by, listened for about ten seconds, and backed away very slowly, I think hoping none of us had noticed him.

I don't think I could post a single verbatim sentence here of what was said that night by anyone without getting red text for all the naughty words, but man was it ever fun at the time!

 

[Theory of Games]

When did it become you suck instead of your idea sucks?

"You suck" predates "Your ideas suck" by about a thousand years or so

 

[CleverNickName]

Another critical part of disagreeing on the Internet (or anywhere else, for that matter) is to recognize when the disagreement is over and move on.

In every discussion, there comes a point when there is nothing new to add, everything that needed to be said has been, and nobody is ever going to change their minds about anything--so the discussion comes to a close. We all know this, and we accept it. But recognizing when a discussion has reached that point can be a hard thing to learn, especially when we're online and can't "read the room" as easily. Like, if we're hanging out at a restaurant, and every time you say something three people get up and leave? You'd get the hint pretty quickly. But on the Internet, you can't see anyone get up from the table, so you might not notice that everyone else is gone and you've been arguing with your ex (or the salt shaker) for half an hour. You might even mistake the silence for agreement, or victory.

So many "discussion" threads here devolve into the same 1d4 people yelling back and forth at each other, completely oblivious to the fact that nothing new has been shared in days and everyone else has left the thread. I think we're all guilty of this, from time to time and to varying degrees; I'm working really hard to improve my skill.