When Players don't respect the DM's rules - Help!

[The Shaman]

Kill him. Take his stuff.


I'm talking about the character, of course.

 

[ShinHakkaider]

I agree with you there. The minute a player I have playing disrepects how I run the game, I ask him to leave the table.

Exactly.

Especially if he knew what the deal was before hand. If he had a problem with it then he should have discussed this with you beforehand and tried to work something out. It looks like he was pulling some ofthe typical gamer passive agressive crap and finessed you into caving. Which sort of sucked. The Op is right this has nothing to do with stats, it has to do with that player's total disrespect for the DM in this case.

Even if you disagree, you still discuss. Not badger, cajole or threaten. You work it out and if you cant come to an agreement then your game is not the game for that player and you'd have to find someplace else to run your game. The bottom line here is no matter how many people say otherwise, unless youre co-Dm'ing with someone, the DM does MORE work to prep for and run a game than a Player does in playing that game. It's not an inditement, it's just a how it is. A player is responsible for his PC(s), the Dm is responsible for everything else and all of the work that entails, including the fun of the players. As a result if the DM is setting up rules for Char gen he's doing so for a reason. That reason can be talked about with the DM and ultimately mutually altered and changed, but it was the WAY that it was done in this particular case that reeks.

 

[ShadowRaven]

My advice, talk, one on one, with some of the others in your group. Ask them "Am I being reasonible with my rules, trying to get the feel of things with as simple a game as possible?" Experienced players and especially DM's will most likely tell it to you straight, and with a great deal of understanding. Heck, every DM was a noob at it once upon a time, they know the preassure.

Also, look for a different venue for play. That way if this guy has a problem, throws a tantrum, and leaves, you can carry on the game with no guilt. Have his character(s) step around a corner away from the party to relieve themselves in private, and get attacked by dire rats. Gives your party a quicky encounter, and a chance to loot the guys corpse(s)

 

[the Jester]

Hmm, I have a problem with the player's behavior. Not only did he not respect the dm's request to send two prepared characters ahead of time- and he must know that a novice dm prolly needs a lil extra time to review things and prep- but he also was dishonest about his second character. He disregarded the dm's call on what acceptable resources were for character building, and threw a hissy fit when the dm said, "No, I already said this is core-only."

Sounds like a serious problem player to me. I'd check in with the others and see if anyone else can host, because I also get the sense that the PP (Problem Player) won't hesitate to use the fact that he's hosting against you to get his way.

Six players is plenty.

 

[Harmon]

Sounds like he has some childish issues. Course I can't tell from here, but it just seems from your description that he's the type to "its my ball and I don't want to use those rules so I am leaving," attitude. :\

As for a suggestion for you- you caved in, you allowed him to play a character you did not want him to play, you have accepted that and now you have to accept it. I would allow no further steps out of your original rules (even for him).

Good luck, and I hope it works out.

 

[Oryan77]

Kill his character in some heroic way. Don't let him know you did it on purpose. Then politely say, "Well that sucked. I guess this would be a good chance to create that core character I asked you to create". Then stick to your guns and make sure his new build follows your request. It may be petty, but it will save you from getting into a petty argument about his illegal character.

Seriously, the guy is a chump. You're not the badguy here and don't let anyone make you feel like you are. I think it's completely out of line for players to purposely disregard what a DM asked for and then whine when the DM confronts them about it.

This guy knew what he was doing. He had full intentions on pulling a fast one over on you. If he's mentally challenged, then I apologize for attacking him. But it doesn't take a braniac to understand how to build a character when the DM says "PHB only". He was insulting your intelligence by playing dumb.

Player's these days get this idea that they are obligated to play whatever they want in YOUR campaign. As if they have a better idea of what your setting should be than you do. People have a lot of nerve making demands. It's ok to make requests if you really want to play a certain PC build....but don't throw a fit & argue about it with the DM.

 

[arwink]

I can understand the players perspective, because it always takes me a few games to switch gears when I go from GMing to playing. I'm used to thinking as a GM, assume that the other guy thinks about running the game the same way I do, and generally being a pain-in-the-butt backseat driver. I'm much better at toning the behaviour down now that I play more often, but the first time I made the switch to playing after being the only DM in the group of five years straight I behaved so badly that the player in question never wanted to DM again.

I'd probably suggest sitting down with the player and having a frank discussion about why you'd like to keep things down to the core. Point out that you don't have their experience, that you're trying to find your feat, and you'd appreciate their co-operation in keeping things "core only" for a while.

The key idea here is that you should be working with your player to find something your both happy with - don't be afraid to say "I'm not comfortable with using that material yet, but tell me what you like about the concept and we'll find a reasonable compramise." RPG's work at their best when Players and GM's are working together to have fun, they're at their worst when the game is a struggle for power between the two sides.

 

[Nellisir]

Just to throw this out...6 characters in a party is a "stronger than core" party, which has 4 members. So yes, you'll have to bump the CR of monsters up to compensate.

 

[Shadowslayer]

I suppose that if one imagines a D&D game as the DMs own private little empire, then "Throw the bastard out" might be a valid answer to the problem.

Then there's some of us who think of D&D as a co-operative thing.

 

[ShadowRaven]

I suppose that if one imagines a D&D game as the DMs own private little empire, then "Throw the bastard out" might be a valid answer to the problem.

Then there's some of us who think of D&D as a co-operative thing.

I agree with you, it is a co-operative sort of thing. The intent is to have fun for everyone. The problem here though is that the player in question was not cooperateing.