Yeah, I'm somewhere along that line myself. I would like to avoid passive-aggressive solutions, and I'm pretty comfortable telling people, "No." However, sometimes players just don't pay attention to house rules and then pitch a fit. In those cases, I typically find it's best to illuminate the reasons why they should not have picked that race/class combo.
So for example, that bugbear would have been barred from entering any cities (or towns, or villages, or any location with guards and walls). The other players would enter towns without Mr. Bugbear, and that player would sit at the table for possibly hours doing nothing (or very little) while everyone else role-plays. I suspect at some point, due to NPC reaction tables in the DMG, that bugbear would eventually walk up to the city gates of a very hostile place and end up running from a hail of arrows. He might not live. If the player did not like this, I would explain that I am not prepared to provide bugbear-friendly modules or role playing, and that is why I advised everyone to use approved characters. However, if he appreciates the quality role-playing provided by having a character skulk around the edges of a forest near town, waiting for everyone else, then by all means, role play that.