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Why I love D&D this week

Piratecat

Writing Fantasy Gumshoe!
Last weekend, Kidcthulhu and I were visiting old friends down in Maryland. These are folks we met playing RPGA games and loved too much to lose track of. Since not all of them are gaming regularly nowadays (new parents), I ran a pick-up game; everyone created a 1st level character (complete with personality) and handed it one space to the right.

The PCs were hired by a wizard to rescue his doggy familiar from the town's guard captain, who had apparently kidnapped it and bound it to him with a magical dog collar. The tiny yappy dog was successfully nabbed by the heroes, who sliced off the collar... and unfortunately found out that the little dog was actually a demon possessing a dog's body. Oops. Things looked bad for our heroes.

Fiendish Dog: "Bow before me, servants, and worship me... or die!"

Fighter: "I've got the dog grappled, but I don't think it's going to matter much."

Druid: "I'll roll a knowledge: nature check." (gets a 25) "Say, you know that one spot that makes a dog's leg twitch uncontrollably?"

DM: "...yes?"

Druid: "I scratch it."

Fiendish dog: "Impudent mortal, what are you... I demand you..." [thumpthumpthump] "Stop that! Hey, stop it!"

Druid: (scratching furiously with a touch attack) "Who's a good infernal doggy-woggy?"

Fiendish dog: "Arrgh! Stop that!"

After having to demonstrate exactly what the dog's leg was doing, and after the laughter died down, I rolled and totally flubbed a concentration check for the canine demon. Best. Tactic. Ever.

-- o --

That's our story. What's happened to you in your game that could never show up in an online RPG computer game?
 

KB9JMQ

Villager
That is priceless PC ;)

Our wizard (played by someone new) rolls his flaming sphere thru his allies to get to the zombies.


Twice.
 
Wow, love that!

My players have negotiated their way out of a major fight, which you can't do in MMORPGs. Of course, a group of them (oddly enough, now on the run from the law) also hide found treasure from the others and subsitute fake items instead.

A lot of my players are or were MMORPG players, so I think they consciously seek out elements in tabletop play that they can't get online.
 
KB9JMQ said:
Our wizard (played by someone new) rolls his flaming sphere thru his allies to get to the zombies.

Twice.
Actually, that is something that can happen in MMORPGs. Using area of effect spells on a PVP-enabled server in EverQuest and your party can be in just as much danger from you as the enemy.
 

Henry

Autoexreginated
There's nothing like a game with some good, creative people. :) Good Lord, that was funny!
 

Sejs

Villager
Piratecat said:
That's our story. What's happened to you in your game that could never show up in an online RPG computer game?
Lots. Time and again I keep seeing the direction of my game veer off to one side due to the unexpexted result on some skill check or another.

Very loyal allies have been made out of former enemies by virtue of a fumbled Move Silently check.

Sweeping gang wars in one of the largest cities in the Forgotten Realms have resulted from failed Gather Information checks tipping off the badguys that the PCs were looking for them. Said gang wars ended up unseating the top organization, who was secretly headed by a cabal of yuan-ti from another country.

So on and so forth. You just don't get that kind of reactive, fluid world in an MMO.



Heh, plus you never seem to get the same amusing quotes out of them. (NPC) So, wait, how did the lord die? (PC) He died of natural causes.. in his own home.. from old age.. in broad daylight... from a crossbow bolt.
 

buzz

Villager
This whole post is awesome, but THIS:
Piratecat said:
...everyone created a 1st level character (complete with personality) and handed it one space to the right.
...is the awesomest.
 

Aeson

Adventurer
You can tickle in WOW but it would have no effect. If you use Vent or Teamspeak while playing you can have interaction much like at the table.
 
Last edited:
Typical low-level dungeon (The Burning Plague, in fact) with typical kobolds hiding behind cover.

The PCs have previously bashed down the door to get at the kobolds.

Me: The kobolds jabber at you and hurl javelins. You're each struck once for... *rolls dice* 2... and 3 points of damage.

Player: I pick up the door and use it as a shield to block the next volley of javelins.

Me: Er, what's your PC's Strength?

Player: 16.

Me: (glances at Player's Handbook) Okay, you pick up the door.

Player: On my next turn, I rush the kobolds, holding the door out in front of me.

Me: *rolls some dice* You charge. The kobolds squeel in terror, but before they can get out of the way, you squish them against the far wall.

Player: I clean off the door.
 

Schmoe

Explorer
Joshua Randall said:
Typical low-level dungeon (The Burning Plague, in fact) with typical kobolds hiding behind cover.

The PCs have previously bashed down the door to get at the kobolds.

Me: The kobolds jabber at you and hurl javelins. You're each struck once for... *rolls dice* 2... and 3 points of damage.

Player: I pick up the door and use it as a shield to block the next volley of javelins.

Me: Er, what's your PC's Strength?

Player: 16.

Me: (glances at Player's Handbook) Okay, you pick up the door.

Player: On my next turn, I rush the kobolds, holding the door out in front of me.

Me: *rolls some dice* You charge. The kobolds squeel in terror, but before they can get out of the way, you squish them against the far wall.

Player: I clean off the door.
Wow, that's eerie. When I was DMing The Burning Plague, the party had taken cover behind a table from crossbow-wielding kobolds behind another table. The PCs were outgunned and relatively fragile, so two of them picked up their table and bullrushed through the other table, crushing both kobolds beneath.

It happened in Virginia, in May.
 

billd91

Hobbit on Quest
I like the quirky personal interactions that come up and you'll never see them in a computer RPG, at least not easily.

Playing Oriental Adventures, 1st edition. Party members include a LE samurai, a LG monk, a wu jen/ninja, and a demon hunter (adapted from Mythic China), as well as a couple of other less-frequently played PCs.
The samurai had a set of daisho called Blades of Excellent Damage (from Ochimo: Spirit Warrior). They were evil blades that always did max damage. I made sure to include a fumble chart in this game so that the blades would have a distinct disadvantage as well (injuring self/ally being one potential result).

After a couple of NPC allies bit the dust due to use of the blade and the demon-hunter getting kind of spooked about the evil swords, the monk and demon hunter conspired to steal the swords. Trying to cross a river infested with poisonous snakes, the samurai fell unconscious and the conspirators saw their chance. They fished out the samurai and tossed his blades back in the muck, saying they were lost in the crossing.
The wu jen was aware of this and liked the samurai and his effectiveness enough not to take this lying down. So he retrieved the blades long after dark and returned them to the samurai, who kept them hidden for a while to see how this was all going to turn out. The only players who knew of this recovery were the wu jen's and the samurai's.
When they eventually returned to the samurai's homeland, the samurai took out the daisho and said "Well, now that I'm home, I can't be seen without these," and strapped them on.

The monk asked, "Where... where did you find those?!?"

The samurai answered, "They found me!"
The monk player's jaw dropped open. It was hysterical.
 

Olaf the Stout

Adventurer
Improvised weaponry is always fun. That's one reason why I love playing the Everyday Hero archetype in Feng Shui. So many different ways to make use of the scenery.

Great story by the way PC.

Olaf the Stout
 
ok got one for u guys its with a new player i was running shadows of the last war
anyway there on the ship and i tell emit late evening and ask em what there doing. theres only 2 pc both fighteres... morgan says hes sharping his so i ask the nobbi his pc james what his doing..
james watching the stars
me so what weapons u have
james ... i hid em in the cabin ...
me what?
james yeah so they wont get stolen
me...ummm ok
so they get jumped by 8 skeletons and r suprised morgen holds his on and even with crew help james gets mangled so he has 1 and manges to climb up the mast hanging in the ropes he gets an AoO on the skeltons climbing after him and kicks both with an high str and good rolls he takes em both out lol couldnt belive it
so morgens fighting the 2 thats left with 4 crew helping
james...i want to throw my boot at em
me...what
morgen man thats dumb
james ..im gonna hit them with my boots
me..your gonna take your boots off hangeing ftom the rigging?
james yeah
me so u want to try to take your boots off while hangeing high in the rigging?
james ..yeah i wanna throw my boots at him
me...so your gonna to try to take your boots off bearly hanging high up in the ropes
james...yeah
me ok ...make a reflex save dc 15
james...why
me your hangeing in the ropes trying to pull off your boot
james ..oh
he rolled a 3
i handed him the d6
he was lucky morgen killed the skeletons and made it to him at -9
lol was funny
 

Aurora

Villager
Wow, that is freaking hilarious. Reminds me of that Venture Bros episode with the 3 headed dog.......TFS!
 

crow81

Villager
This week and every week

A year ago I started a 1/2 orc NG Eunuch Cleric of Pelor. A deck of many things, a very creative GM and some really strange magic. My were-ape female CN cleric of Jormary just gave birth to magicly enhanced twins.

Try that in an on-line game

;)
 

Cedric

Villager
2nd edition...we're stomping through Myth Drannor making a mess of everything. Our wizard is busy laying waste with his newly acquired Staff of Power.

We break into a new house and are looking for a good spot to camp out for the night...and unfortunately, we stumbled upon a Vampire.

Of course, big fight breaks out. I'm doing the rogue thing (which translates as not much against a Vampire, but I'm trying). The magic-user has his Staff of Power hard at work, the Fighter is laying into the Vampire.

And, oops, the Fighter gets Dominated by the Vampire and sets out upon his new task of defending the Vampire.

Without pause the guy playing the Fighter (Phillip), turns on the Magic-User and says, "Called Shot on the Staff of Power."

So, I'm left ...the rogue...trying to handle the Vampire...our Fighter and Magic-User are chasing one another round...ok, the Fighter was doing the chasing.

It worked out in the end, the Mage got enough space to get off a teleport and get out of range, meanwhile the bard helped me finish off the Vampire and the dominate broke.

*whew*

I swear, I can't get across how funny it was when Phillip gets dominated and 0.5 seconds later says, "Called Shot on the Staff of Power!!"

Cedric
 

der_kluge

Villager
IMC, the party Knight bested the local champion in a joust. Afterwards, the party rogue approached the camp of the defeated knight and offered to share information about the winner (The PC). Of course, all of his information was false, but given that they knew nothing of the PCs character, any information was better than nothing.

The discussion went something like this:

NPC: Where is this man from?
PC: He's from the south.
NPC: The south?! No one is from the south. There's nothing but dark forest and swamps that way. What kind of man lives in a place like that?
PC: I heard he's not really a man.
NPC: *slack-jawed* What's that you say?
PC: Yea, I hear he's half dragon (not true)

To this day, people still approach the knight in town and whisper "is it true you're part dragon?"

:lol:
 

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