Yea, my priority is pretty much the opposite. I like building my character mechanically, and then deriving backstory and personality from the choices I made. I think we're diametrically opposed on our priorities, which is why our opinion on feats is also diametrically opposed.
I'm not diametrically opposed. I enjoy mechanical differentiation as much as the next guy. I happily powergamed my way through 3.0/3.5/4e. I picked the most optimal feats possible and loved every minute of it. After 14 years of that, I'm kind of done with it, though. I've seen the difference removing those choices had on the game. And I love it more than I ever thought I would.
It's subtle. But when a game session in 3.5e ended, my friends would immediately pull out their books and start planning what classes they were taking for the next 5 levels and which feats they'd take in order to "complete their build" so they could finally play the character they wanted to play. Then they'd discuss which character's they'd made as backup characters and the cool combos they found by combining feats.
When my 5e session ends, they sit around and discuss the NPCs they hate and which direction they plan on heading next session. Whether they care more about stopping the bandits or helping the dwarves with their undead problem. They also discuss whether or not one of their old characters who became and NPC might be tracking them down.
The focus of the game has really shifted now that feats aren't that important to their characters and so far apart to obtain. This is where I want the focus of the game to be. So, for me, this is a good thing. I like the focus on the character's personalities and their adventures.
And my desire is for people to see the list of feats and have too many solid choices to take them all. I want my players to look at the list of feats and HONESTLY consider taking NO stat bumps.
I've honestly considered that already. There's just not ENOUGH good feats for a particular character. I'd love there to be more. But right now, there are maybe 1 or 2 that really work for any one character. I think a certain type of character might consider taking all feats.
There should be a reward for making a mechanical choice that DIFFERENTIATES your character. Saying "I'm a dwarf who loves getting into bar fights" is old hat. I'd rather see you take Tavern Brawler, and prove it by doing it.
Why? What does mechanically differentiating your character make it better somehow? Does not having the feat prevent you from getting into bar fights? All the feat does is make you more powerful when getting in bar fights. It certainly doesn't make bar fights somehow "better" or the character "better". All it does is make them different in a very small and inconsequential way. Exactly the same as saying "I like to get into bar fights" in scope.
However, in one case the conversation is about the character and in the other it's about the mechanics.
Contrast:
"I punch that guy in the face!"
"Not again! Why are you always getting into bar fights?!?"
"Shut your face! I love fighting!"
vs
"I punch that guy in the face. I do more damage because I have Tavern Brawler!"
"I thought about taking that feat. But I didn't think we'd get into enough bar fights to make it worthwhile"
"That's why I'm starting this bar fight. I took the feat, I'm going to darn well use it!"