D&D General worst (real) advice for DMs

[Hussar]

Heh, I know this one's going to get me in trouble:

"The DM is the final arbiter"

Absolutely the worst advice in an RPG.

 

[Jacob Lewis]

The worst advice for DMs is the advice you take from a stranger who knows (or cares) nothing about you, your group, or your preferences. Do not give high value to an opinion from someone that does not care about your own. And if you're going to look for anything online, look for inspiration not advice.

 

[Flamestrike]

Always have a DMNPC ready to bail the PCs out if they get in over their heads.

He should have bi-colored eyes, dual wield katanas, be mysterious and universally respected by everyone else in the game.

 

[touc]

Over 25+ years of DMing, I've created my own bad advice, adhered to it, and hopefully learned from it. Notably, as long as your players know you're working hard, it's going to be all right if you apply bad advice or F*-up because you're trying something that sounded cool. That said, my top 3 personal F*-ups:

1. Tell your players after they muck up an encounter what they could have done better. After all, the only way players are going to learn proper strategy and to properly use their character abilities is through an experienced DM that knows better than them.
2. Everyone is welcome at our table because we have a shared love of D&D, which has uniquely enriched our lives somehow. This has been a rough lesson. No, life doesn't work that way. Just because I like to eat parmesan garlic chicken wings and you do doesn't mean we are going to get along. It doesn't mean you're going to get along with friends who are already at the table. I've nearly tanked friendships by inviting gamers who were disruptive, or simply were nice but didn't want the same out of the game as the other gamers did, and glossing over it. By keeping them at my table, it was sending a message to my long-time gamers that I didn't prize their feelings as much as I did my own egotistical need to have all seats filled. My friends would have been patient.
3. This is the "best" way to play [insert style of play such as gritty game, superhero game, railroads, sandboxes, plot-immune characters and so on]. Draw on your own experiences as a former player or previous DM and presume all new players to your table will enjoy what made or makes you enjoy the game. Now, force this down their throats and make them feel like the way they like to do it is somehow outdated, or wrong, or they're a noob. They'll get in line so you can run the story you want to run. Then, if a player does anything that doesn't fit this mindset, get on a forum and complain about it. You'll quickly be surrounded by like-minded players that will reassure you that your perspective is the correct one.

 

[Benjamin Olson]

This reminds me of Matt Colville saying he believes there are no Bad Players - the players you feel are bad players just aren't right for the table/group/game they're at, but will be perfectly fine with others who share the same ideas.

I mean it's a nice sentiment, and mostly true as long as you accept that the "right table" for some players might be A) a table of other complete creeps, B) a table not playing a TTRPG, because they have no actual interest in doing that, or C) a table in a mental asylum.

 

[Mort]

Oh sweet summer child, if those are the worst players you can imagine...
Generally it's the players who insult & abuse other players (& the GM) I find are the worst, especially when they do a motte & bailey tactic of "It's just my character" when called on it.

Yeah, I've played with these kinds of players and they are toxic. Generally, they actively look for excuses to cause conflict.

because if they actually wanted to roleplay, they could bring in a character who's goal is to help the group - then THAT'S what their character would do.

 

[TerraDave]

What I have seen a lot of is probably good advice--from highly reputable sources--that essentially tells DMs how to do a better job is they would just work harder. And here is the 10-20 ways to do it.

I am not looking for that advice. I am really not.

 

[Oofta]

Heh, I know this one's going to get me in trouble:

"The DM is the final arbiter"

Absolutely the worst advice in an RPG.

Bah! The DM must make the final call or the game falls into chaos! Chaos I tells ya!

Oh, wait ...

Only I know how to properly run the game, your game would work so much better if you listen to me.

Umm, never mind.

 

[prabe]

Draw on your own experiences as a former player or previous DM and presume all new players to your table will enjoy what made or makes you enjoy the game. Now, force this down their throats and make them feel like the way they like to do it is somehow outdated, or wrong, or they're a noob. They'll get in line so you can run the story you want to run. Then, if a player does anything that doesn't fit this mindset, get on a forum and complain about it. You'll quickly be surrounded by like-minded players that will reassure you that your perspective is the correct one.

I get the point you're getting at, but there is some value in "Try to run games you'd enjoy playing in," even if when taken to the extreme it can get very onetrueway-ish.

 

[Stormonu]

"You have to plan your character out to level 20 before the game begins"

I don't even plan to play to level 20, and the best laid plans rarely go to plan.