You know you play dnd too much when.....

[Kae'Yoss]

...you see someone get hurt and say "ooo, crit"
...you hurt yourself and shout "cleric"

 

[STARP_JVP]

I've seen these on an email. I can't remember all of them, but my favourites were:
You know you play D&D too much when...

• You can remember your character's entire history, down to the names of everybody he's slain, but you can't remember how many kids you have.
• Your 15th-level elven fighter has had sex in the last five years and you haven't.
• When someone asks what those tattoos on your hands are, you say "they aren't tattoos; they're die imprints."
• Your resume lists your level, hit dice and Charisma score.

I wish I could remember more.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

You're driving down the street and see a Dodge Viper with the vanity license plate "520HP"...and you wonder what classes & levels the PC has and if he's divine, because he's DEFINITELY epic!

(raises hand guiltily)

You have been telling the joke "Jesus Saves! and only takes half damage!" ...since 1980.

(raises hand guiltily)

You buy dice or any other RPG product while vacationing in any city with topless/clothing optional beaches.

(Not me...yet-Whew!)

 

[jerichothebard]

You find yourself wondering how many ranks in handle animal your cat's vetrinarian has, because she can pick him up without bleeding, and you can't.

 

[STARP_JVP]

...you roll your bluff check before faking an orgasm...

 

[Jdvn1]

... relate everything in live to the orc-pie scenario.

 

[Prince of Happiness]

You size people up by CR.

 

[Whimsical]

You take college courses, such as medievel history, public speaking, acting, and fencing, just to improve your game.

You attempt something that you wouldn't have attempted in the past because, hey, anyone can roll a 20.

You realize that if it wasn't for gaming, the entire rest of your life would consist of going to work, watching TV alone, and sleeping.

While watching a high action movie you start listing off the DCs of all of the various skill checks and saves the characters are performing.

All of your vacation time is scheduled to attend gaming cons.

When you visit your friendly neighborhood gaming store, the store owner automatically pulls out for you the new gaming stuff that he knows you want without you needing to order it.

When someone asks you about "the big game," you have to stop yourself from geeking out and gushing about the amazing series of critical hits your uber dwarven defender performed last night against the big bad evil guy. Then respond "I don't know" because you don't watch sports.

You have concluded that marrying a nongamer is unacceptable. Except for Willow Rosenburg.

 

[Xath]

...your purse is full of dice.
...you seriously contemplate getting a "Pocket Player's Handbook" for your purse, "just in case."
...you started carrying a purse so that you could have dice with you at all times.
...you don't know a reference someone makes and you refer to yourself as having "0 ranks in Knowledge(Pop Culture)."

,,,when the statements listed above are all true.

 

[eris404]

...when you go to the movies, you tend to stat the cool monster/aliens/cool characters. :\

(Edit - LOL! I even just referred to the movie characters as NPCs. I'm doomed)