Where is my Freaking Mule?!

[darjr]

Mules are unheroic.

As are torches, rope, iron spikes, sacks, chalk, 10' poles, flint & tender, iron rations, more rope, mirrors, sprigs of wolfsbane, and garlic. Since you don't need any of these things cluttering up your character sheet, you don't need a mule carrying them, much less porters, torcher bearers, drovers or teamsters for carrying the stuff in and out of the howling wilderness. Nobody ever used that stuff anyway because they all used heroic type IV bags of holding (available for heros to purchase at local general goods stores), and if they did use mules and such anyway, it's all badwrongfun.

I resist your attempts to rain on my 4e loving parade. Get back to the 70's and 80's were wierdo's like you belong.

Uhm...

Hempen rope (50ft) - players handbook
Silken rope (50ft) - players handbook
Torch - players handbook
Climbers Kit - pitons - players handbook
Backpack - adventures kit -players handbook
Fint and Steel - players handbook
Quarterstaff - not quite 10' feet - players handbook
journeybread and trail rations - players handbook
Disguise kit has a mirror, at least I'd rule it does - players handbook
Rare herbs - players handbook

I'm just saying.

 

[UngeheuerLich]

Then don't start a snarky thread asking where your freaking mule is. Most of the stuff in your proposed Book of Mundane Stuff (TM) would take less time for your DM to come up with on the fly than it took you to post. Stuff can exist outside of a rulebook. (Weird, I know!)

wow, that was uncalled for...

I also believe you don´t need a book full of roleplaying items... but it would fill some pages of DMG 3 quie well.

 

[Plane Sailing]

Then don't start a snarky thread asking where your freaking mule is. Most of the stuff in your proposed Book of Mundane Stuff (TM) would take less time for your DM to come up with on the fly than it took you to post. Stuff can exist outside of a rulebook. (Weird, I know!)

It's called humour. Enjoy it or not, as you wish, but it sounds like it probably isn't the thread for you.

Regards,

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

You rolled a 1 in the archery contest.

Ah, but you seem to be untrained in Insight.

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

The powergamer on the other hand, buys the powerful magical item and is suddenly much more powerful than the poor roleplayer. The roleplayer has been penalized for daring to roleplay.

So the 4e designers decided lets remove the roleplaying aspects of treasure and make it all about power. That way the roleplayers have no choice but to buy magic items and thus they will never fall behind the power curve. I don't love this approach but as a DM it's certainly kept my headaches down to a bare minimum.

The level of the magic items a character can buy usually is a flatter curve in 4E, so the person buying the house isn't at a disadvantage to "the powergamer." And the designers didn't make the game "all about power" or "only about magic items." Instead they left such aspects up to the DM. An unrealistic world only occurs if you allow it to be unrealistic.

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

It's called humour. Enjoy it or not, as you wish, but it sounds like it probably isn't the thread for you.

Regards,

I reply to humor with humor and get slapped for it. Can I be Curly?

 

[Tav_Behemoth]

That would be the common Pitfinder Donkeyhorse.

Snackrun Donkeyhorse, IIRC. Its other notable use is in carrying the party's stash of medieval Cheetos and Mountain Dew.

Flamedeath Donkeyhorse, of course.

My seven year old confirms that you don't need deep familiarity with 4E naming conventions to find these hilarious. Some others we came up with:

A mule heavily dosed with poison before being fed to a monster: Bellyache Donkeyhorse

A mule cut open and climbed into by a halfling as an ice cave survival measure: Nastyblanket Donkeyhorse

 

[Dice4Hire]

I find it a bit disappointing the OP needs official stats for a mule.

Mod something or handwave it or make it up yourself out of whole cloth.

 

[Stoat]

I think it's important to note that gold in 4e isn't really representative of spending cash - it's more of an alternative, point based system of character advancement.

The same is true in 3E.

I kinda wish that Fourth had just gone ahead and done a point-based system for items.

 

[korjik]

Ah, but you seem to be untrained in Insight.

Since I am the DM in question, and have had this conversation in person with Zaran, that seems unlikely.

You are very free with my prep time. While I could come up with stuff rather easily, it would be rather time consuming. Time that would take away from things like plot or enounter design.

It is too bad that there isnt some organization which has people who get paid to make books that one could buy, that would have the stuff we would like in it.