There are always things to discuss! But IMO, and IME, I have noted the following-
1. People who have a preferred playstyle ... prefer that playstyle (I know ... shocker).
2. Therefore, people who have a preferred playstyle believe very strongly that their preference is a good one.
3. Because people have preferences, there is a natural desire to defend one's preferences ... especially when some people view a term as pejorative (as there is a continuing debate about optimizing v. minmaxing v. munchkins).
4. I have often noted that the same personality types that enjoy minmaxing/optimizing are the same personality types that believe that this is a better playstyle. Because ... well, it's an optimum playstyle. That it can be logically reasoned toward, just like you can logically reason toward an optimum character sheet. It's not a perfect correlation, but it happens fairly often.
5. Which is why these discussions tend to be ... less than fruitful. You can't solve for it. Just like you can't solve for "having a cell phone at the table," or "should PvP be disallowed, tolerated, or encouraged." It's a group social decision.
That said, I don't disagree that mimmaxing and roleplaying are mutually exclusive. But it's a question of focus- some people put the game mechanics first, some people don't.* There is no wrong decision here, just a question of preference.
*And this isn't a binary or a .... *shudder* false dichotomy. The most hardcore "realism/RP" players are aware of the mechanics, and the most hard core optimizers are completely capable of roleplaying.
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