RPG Evolution: When Gaming Bleeds

Monte Cook Games recently released Consent in Gaming, a sensitive topic that addresses subjects that make some players uncomfortable. Central to the understanding of why there's a debate at all involves the concept of "bleed" in role-play.

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Picture courtesy of Pixabay.​

Bleed Basics

Courtney Kraft explains bleed:
It’s a phenomenon where the emotions from a character affect the player out of the game and vice versa. Part of the joy of roleplay comes from diving into the fantasy of being something we’re not. When we play a character for a long time, it’s easy to get swept up in the highs of victorious battle and the lows of character death. When these feelings persist after the game is over, that’s when bleed occurs.
Bleed isn't inherently bad. Like actors in a movie, players sometimes draw on experiences to fuel their role-playing, consciously or subconsciously, and this bleed can happen organically. What's of concern in gaming is when bleed has detrimental consequences to the player.

Consent in Gaming explains the risks of negative bleed:
There’s nothing wrong with bleed—in fact, it’s part of the reason we play games. We want to be excited when our character is excited, to feel the loss when our characters do. However, bleed can cause negative experiences if not handled carefully. For example, maybe a character acted in a way that your character didn’t like, and it made you angry at the player too. Or maybe your character is flirting with another character, and you’re worried that it’s also making you have feelings for the player. It’s important to talk about these distinctions between characters and players early and often, before things take an unexpected turn.
There are several aspects that create bleed, and it's central to understanding why someone would need consent in a game at all. Bleed is a result of immersion, and the level of immersion dictates the social contract of how the game is played. This isn't limited to rules alone, but rests as much on the other players as it is on the subject matter.

One of the experiences that create bleed is a player's association with the game's subject matter. For some players, less realistic games (like Dungeons & Dragons) have a lower chance of the game's experiences bleeding into real life, because it's fantasy and not analogous to real life. Modern games might have the opposite effect, mirroring real life situations a player has experience with. There are plenty of players who feel otherwise of course, particularly those deeply involved in role-playing their characters for some time -- I've experienced bleed role-playing a character on a spaceship just as easily as a modern game.

The other element that can affect bleed is how the game is played. Storytelling games often encourage deeper emotional involvement from a player, while more gamist tabletop games create a situational remove from the character by their nature -- miniatures, tactical combat, and other logistics that are less about role-playing and more about tactics. Live Action Role-Playing games (LARPs) have the player physically inhabit their role and are thus provide more opportunities for bleed. Conversely, Massive Multi-Player Online Role-Playing Games (MMORPGs) might seem like they make bleed unlikely because the player is at a computer, experiencing the game through a virtual avatar -- and yet it can still happen. Players who play a game for a long time can experience more bleed than someone who just joined a game.

Dungeons & Dragons is a particular flashpoint for discussions of bleed, because while it is a fantasy game that can easily be played with disposable characters navigating a dungeon, it can also have surprisingly emotional depth and complexity -- as many live streams of tabletop play have demonstrated.

These two factors determine the "magic circle," where the reality of the world is replaced by the structure of another reality. The magic circle is not a magic wall -- it's porous, and players can easily have discussions about what's happening in the real world, make jokes derived from popular culture their characters would never know, or even just be influenced by their real life surroundings.

The deeper a player engages in the magic circle, the more immersed that player becomes. Governing the player's social contract within the magic circle is something Nordic LARP calls this "the alibi," in which the player accepts the premise that their actions don't reflect on them but rather their character:
Rather than playing a character who is very much like you (“close to home”), deliberately make character choices that separates the character from you and provides some differentiation. If your character has a very similar job to your ideal or actual job, find a reason for your character to change jobs. If your character has a very similar personality to you, find aspects of their personality that are different from yours to play up and focus on. Or play an alternate character that is deliberately “further from home”.

Bleeding Out

Where things get sticky is when real life circumstances apply to imaginary concepts. Bleed exists within the mind of each player but is influenced by the other players. It is fungible and can be highly personal. Additionally, what constitutes bleed can be an unconscious process. This isn't necessarily a problem -- after all, the rush of playing an awesome superhero can be a positive influence for someone who doesn't feel empowered in real life -- unless the bleed touches on negative subjects that makes the player uncomfortable. These psychological triggers are a form of "bleed-in," in which the player's psychology affects the character experience. Not all bleed moments are triggers, but they can be significantly distressing for players who have suffered some form of abuse or trauma.

Consent in Gaming attempts to address these issues by using a variety of tools to define the social contract. For players who are friends, those social contracts have likely been established over years through both in- and out-of-game experiences. But for players who are new to each other, social contracts can be difficult to determine up front, and tools like x-cards can go a long way in preventing misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Thanks to the increasing popularity of tabletop role-playing games, players are coming from more diverse backgrounds with a wide range of experiences. An influx of new players means those experiences will not always be compatible with established social contracts. The recent incident at the UK Gaming Expo, as reported by Darryl is an egregious example of what happens when a game master's expectations of what's appropriate for a "mature" game doesn't match the assumed social contract of players at the table.

This sort of social contract reinforcement can seem intrusive to gamers who have long-suffered from suspicion that they are out of touch with reality, or that if they play an evil character, they are evil (an allegation propagated during the Satanic Panic). This need to perform under a "cover" in their "real" life has made the entire concept of bleed and its associated risks a particularly sensitive topic of discussion.

X-cards and consent discussions may not be for everyone, but as we welcome new players with new experiences into the hobby, those tools will help us all negotiate the social contract that makes every game's magic circle a magical experience.
 

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Michael Tresca

Michael Tresca

Perhaps. How would you know?

The arguments I see against is seem to be of the forms: 1) "this infringes on MY freedom", 2) theorycraft from people who are not mental health professionals, making claims about what works or doesn't for people who have issues, or 3) people who outright don't want to have to deal with the fact that there are folks in our world who are injured or have problems. While those opinons are interesting, I should hardly take them as conclusive on whether this tool works better than how these thigns were handled (or not handled) in the past.

Meanwhile, the folks who actually have trauma or phobias or similar issues, or folks who run/play games with them, seem to like the thing. They note that it is no panacea, but see it as helpful.

We can think of this as a bit of assistive technology. Like, say, a wheelchair - if you don't use a wheelchair, don't assist someone who is in a wheelchair, and don't have the skills to design or build wheelchairs... how much should anyone listen to your opinion on wheelchairs?

Especially, if your basic argument is "I shouldn't see handicapped parking in lots I park in, because those are spaces I could have used," well, your opinon's probably right out, isn't it?
I wouldnt use "wheel chair". I would use the term "assistive technology" though. Specifically akin to a pain blocker or pain killer. It functions similarly to morphine. Over use or use for too long actually tends to have a negative effect for the majority of users. It kills the pain. Literally a pain killer or pain blocker. I do recognize it as useful for people in the right circumstance though.
 

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I rather like the term bleed, in no small part because it is emotional. It's messy. It's unintentional. I doubt you're going to get agreement on "nice and clinical".
Well. Its usually unintentional. Some people do WANT to bleed after all. Some dms therefore intentionally cause it. Sometimes the intense emotions and even potentially disgust or fear are actually desired. For some people this "really gets them into the game world" so to speak.
 

When we start talking about making changes in social arrangements or behavior (like, say, using an X-card when we didn't do so before), we run into a basic implication: Doing something like this is better than what we used to do.
That's not an implication, it's an opinion. And it's one I disagree with. I feel that implementing 'X Cards' as they are presented in Consent in Gaming is not only a social ill, but a disservice to the people that most need it.

And... lots of folks take the route of getting angry and pushing back, rather than the route of introspection, acceptance of responsibility, and adjustment of behavior.
The only anger I see is coming from the side that is one step away from claiming their ideological foes are nazis.


Okay. So, here's the thing that may have gotten missed - if a player tells you to stop something, an extremely common response is to ask, "Why?" and enter into a dialog.
Yes. So we can know what is needed to be avoided. And actually quite often the question is "Stop what?"

An X Card is blanket no go. It shuts everything down and removes the capacity to meaningfully move beyond what situation the X Card was thrown over. Because you have no idea what the X Card was tossed for.

[/QUOTE]But a lot of GMs are not ready to handle conversations like that, and how to handle them is outside the purview of an RPG supplement.[/QUOTE]
So, every one might just have to learn how to have a conversation. It's what growing up and adulting is about.


We can think of this as a bit of assistive technology. Like, say, a wheelchair - if you don't use a wheelchair, don't assist someone who is in a wheelchair, and don't have the skills to design or build wheelchairs... how much should anyone listen to your opinion on wheelchairs?
Which is fine until someone throws the Wheelchair Card which shuts down all travel that isn't in a wheelchair.

Because that's what the X Card is. It's a stoppage to everything except whatever the thrower wants to allow to continue. And if they are a nice, decent sort, they'll even tell you what that is.

But if they don't, you're not allowed to ask.
 

Because that's what the X Card is. It's a stoppage to everything except whatever the thrower wants to allow to continue. And if they are a nice, decent sort, they'll even tell you what that is.

No, it's a stoppage of ONE THING. That's it. One thing. Not everything. Not all play. Just this one thing.

Funny how I am only a decent, nice sort if I justify myself to you satisfactorily. The fact that I say, "I don't want to do this" apparently isn't good enough to get you to stop doing whatever it is. I need to also tell you why I don't want to do this, because, apparently, my feelings on the matter aren't justification enough. :uhoh: If I don't justify myself apparently, I'm not a nice or decent sort.

If the DM is so oblivious to the situation that he or she cannot possibly parse why someone might be feeling really bad about whatever situation the group finds themselves in, then perhaps some empathy training might be in order?
 

No, it's a stoppage of ONE THING. That's it. One thing. Not everything. Not all play. Just this one thing.

Funny how I am only a decent, nice sort if I justify myself to you satisfactorily. The fact that I say, "I don't want to do this" apparently isn't good enough to get you to stop doing whatever it is. I need to also tell you why I don't want to do this, because, apparently, my feelings on the matter aren't justification enough. :uhoh: If I don't justify myself apparently, I'm not a nice or decent sort.

If the DM is so oblivious to the situation that he or she cannot possibly parse why someone might be feeling really bad about whatever situation the group finds themselves in, then perhaps some empathy training might be in order?

What if that one thing is actually pivotal to the rest of session or in extreme cases campaign? Suddenly you have a great number of changes you need to make or you deprive the rest of your players an experience that they are perfectly comfortable with and they now have a diluted experience at the table.

Also you are not only moral and decent if you agree with the rest at table. This is not a matter of moral integrity, its a discussion of the methodology. A person still has a range of options before, during and after d&d. Talking is key, what I mostly find unappealing about the X card is its function of replacing actual communication between people to establish true bonds amongst the play group which can develop through such small struggles. The X card is merely a shallow replacement of productive communication and deprives the player of confronting their issue AND the GM of a point of view they had not considered before writing something that was inappropriate for certain people.

The way things are going empathy training will be required because you people are so willing to replace perfectly fine systems in play to develop people.
 

The fact that I say, "I don't want to do this" ...
Do what? Did you read Consent in Gaming? You don't have to even talk about what "this thing" is, and no one is allowed to ask.

Hussar: [Setting the scene, the BBEG and it's minions sweep in, descriptions flow, BBEG starts to monologue...]
Player X: /touches X Card. Says nothing.

What do you Hussar? Is Player X being emotionally shattered by your lurid description of the twisted deformed minions (maybe they have body horror issues)? Do they feel uncomfortable by your description of the flamboyant Tim Curryesque scenery chewing BBEG (maybe they're in the closet with their deeply bigoted family and such depictions cause them extreme panic as well as your casting the flamboyant gay as the villain)? Do they hate villain monologues (agree, X Card that right out!)? Or has Player Z been staring at them and breathing heavily just a little to long and now they're feeling very unsafe at the very table?

You don't know Hussar, Player X doesn't have to tell you, and you aren't allowed to ask.


And no, not being a mind reader doesn't make us mere mortal and imperfect GMs "oblivious". So pack your moralizing sidewise.
 

GENCON VIII... As observed by myself as Convention Chairman...

Reporter for TV Channel 12, Milwaukee (to Gary Gygax): "Do you really believe that you're a wizard when playing this game?"

Gary Gygax: "Do you believe that you're a slum lord when playing Monopoly?"
 

Do what? Did you read Consent in Gaming? You don't have to even talk about what "this thing" is, and no one is allowed to ask.

Hussar: [Setting the scene, the BBEG and it's minions sweep in, descriptions flow, BBEG starts to monologue...]
Player X: /touches X Card. Says nothing.

What do you Hussar? Is Player X being emotionally shattered by your lurid description of the twisted deformed minions (maybe they have body horror issues)? Do they feel uncomfortable by your description of the flamboyant Tim Curryesque scenery chewing BBEG (maybe they're in the closet with their deeply bigoted family and such depictions cause them extreme panic as well as your casting the flamboyant gay as the villain)? Do they hate villain monologues (agree, X Card that right out!)? Or has Player Z been staring at them and breathing heavily just a little to long and now they're feeling very unsafe at the very table?

You don't know Hussar, Player X doesn't have to tell you, and you aren't allowed to ask.

No, nor should you. The fact that the player has a problem with it should be enough. If the player wants to tell you why, he can, but you should have zero expectation that he would. You aren’t entitled to that information - it’s up to him.
 


What if that one thing is actually pivotal to the rest of session or in extreme cases campaign? Suddenly you have a great number of changes you need to make or you deprive the rest of your players an experience that they are perfectly comfortable with and they now have a diluted experience at the table.

If it’s that central to the session or campaign, you should end the session right then and consider your options. I would have thought that was obvious. You may need to completely rewrite your campaign, or else tell your player that it’s going to feature heavily going forward, and so he may need to drop out. Personally, I’d probably just cancel the campaign and run something else.
 

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