D&D 5E Rename the Monster Manual

[Warpiglet-7]

what are you some kind of chaotic neutral druid?

No no

we went to Hawaii ma y years ago and they told us about sea life getting caught in those rings. Terrible. I am a consumer—we buy too much crap but cutting those up is fast and 17 years later just second nature.

To make sure I don’t make myself out to be too nice I also run around burning gas and cranking loud music.

Wasteful! Shameful! Enjoyable!

 

[Helldritch]

I never buy cola or anything in can or bottle rigged in plastic rings. These can be killers. Its been like this for about 25 odd years now. I once caught a small trout with such a plastic around its body. I cut the ring and put it back into the lake. It was enough for me to understand.

 

[R_J_K75]

am a consumer

Great story about consumerism. I fill up my recycling bin quite regularly with beer bottles and cans. Im at work one morning, and I get a text from my neighbor on the right. She says the garbage men came and all I heard was crashing, smashing bottles and cans. 20 seconds later the neighbor on the left texts me and said Rob the garbage men just came and all the beer bottles getting dumped into the truck woke me up.

 

[Warpiglet-7]

Great story about consumerism. I fill up my recycling bin quite regularly with beer bottles and cans. Im at work one morning, and I get a text from my neighbor on the right. She says the garbage men came and all I heard was crashing, smashing bottles and cans. 20 seconds later the neighbor on the left texts me and said Rob the garbage men just came and all the beer bottles getting dumped into the truck woke me up.

I knew I liked you for a reason! Our big barrel is full of glass and aluminum! Beer for the win!

 

[Gammadoodler]

Candidates for Camaraderie?
Kindred in Karma

 

[Mirtek]

View attachment 124135

We i Germany solved this long ago. All shopping carts are secured by a chain which requires a 1€ deposit to come lose. You need to return the cart and refasten the chain to get it back.

Solved 80% of that issue.

 

[doctorbadwolf]

Being from the UK the fact you have this law just baffles me, I think it just shows the power and influence of the automotive industry.

Most places in the US, it ain’t even illegal to cross the road wherever ya please, it’s only “jay walking” if there’s traffic. Still, folks act like it’s only legal to cross at the crosswalk.

We i Germany solved this long ago. All shopping carts are secured by a chain which requires a 1€ deposit to come lose. You need to return the cart and refasten the chain to get it back.

Solved 80% of that issue.

Folks in the USA are too broke for that!

 

[Jfdlsjfd]

The Jay Walker
Medium Friendly Living-challenged Individual (formerly known as Undead), chaotic neutral
Armor Class 24 (regular) 8 (when crossing a street) 2 (on a highway).
Hit points : 4
Speed : 30 ft
STR 10 DEX 10 CON 10 INT 2 WIS 2 CHA 10
Skills: Perception +0 (disadvantage when rolling to notice crosswalks).
Language: English.
CR 1/8

Icon of the American culture.

Actions:

Crossing roads: unlike the chicken, the jay walker can actually cross the roads. Especially 3 meters before the crosswalk, forcing cars to stop brutally just before where they wanted to, generally causing ruckus and making driver lose their god-given priviledge of drive at an average of 40 mph.

Teleport (at-will): just in front of your car when you're distracted.

Unbreakable Wall of the Law: Jay Walker can cast as a reaction a forcefield, provided they have a material component (a crossroad, which isn't consumed by the spell). Unfortunately for them, the forcefield only grants then 1 temporary HP (the name of the ability was somewhat overestimated). (thanks lanefan downthread of the inspiration).

Cause misunderstanding: the jay walker can severely baffle any non-US person when his behaviour is discussed, causing them to be stunned for round. If jaywalking is mentionned in a film or book and must be translated in another language, the baffleness is extended to three round, unless the reader succeed at an Arcana knowledge check about American culture (DC 15).

Haunting: their number should be low, given their tendancy to be run over, and yet, they seem widespread. It's strong evidence of jaywalker being undead, returning ever and ever to cross roads where they were once killed (cue ominous music).

 

[R_J_K75]

I knew I liked you for a reason! Our big barrel is full of glass and aluminum! Beer for the win!

I was out filling up the barrel/bin for a bit, but Im feeling so much better now.

 

[R_J_K75]

The Jay Walker
Medium Friendly Living-challenged Individual (formerly known as Undead), chaotic neutral
Armor Class 24 (regular) 8 (when crossing a street) 2 (on a highway).
Hit points : 4
Speed : 30 ft
STR 10 DEX 10 CON 10 INT 2 WIS 2 CHA 10
Skills: Perception +0 (disadvantage when rolling to notice crosswalks).
Language: English.
CR 1/8

Icon of the American culture.

Actions:

Crossing roads: unlike the chicken, the jay walker can actually cross the roads. Especially 3 meters before the crosswalk, forcing cars to stop brutally just before where they wanted to, generally causing ruckus and making driver lose their god-given priviledge of drive at an average of 40 mph.

Teleport (at-will): just in front of your car when you're distracted.

Cause misunderstanding: the jay walker can severely baffle any non-US person when his behaviour is discussed, causing them to be stunned for round. If jaywalking is mentionned in a film or book and must be translated in another language, the baffleness is extended to three round, unless the reader succeed at an Arcana knowledge check about American culture (DC 15).

Haunting: their number should be low, given their tendancy to be run over, and yet, they seem widespread. It's strong evidence of jaywalker being undead, returning ever and ever to cross roads where they were once killed (cue ominous music).

Jay Walker - There Can Be Just One!