D&D General Races as Pizzas ... Put in your Contributions

[embee]

Chinese Food Pizza? I saw it on a takeout menu so I know it exists.

This is a Pizza Of Thrones-inspired campaign. No Chinese food.

 

[Shiroiken]

Bonus- Elves are calzones. They aren't even pizza, no one really wants one, and yet there are so many of them.

I'd think they were the veggie pizza: someone always wants it, to the annoyance of everyone else.

 

[Minigiant]

Is Half Orc Meatlovers? Finally accepted, little variance on taste but not good for your health.

Full Orc is putting pizza sauce and cheese on a plate fulla meat, namean.

 

[CleverNickName]

Tabaxi are the spicy sausage and jalapeno pizza.
It always sounds like a good decision at the time, but you know you will regret your choice tomorrow.

 

[pukunui]

I have a friend who used to be in the US Navy. He said one time while on shore leave in Croatia, they went to a pizza place. They couldn't read the menu, so they picked one at random. They were brought a pizza with a whole fish slapped on top.

What D&D race would that be?

 

[CleverNickName]

@pukunui Definitely tortle. Possibly triton, if it was quality fish that was cooked well.

 

[Minigiant]

I have a friend who used to be in the US Navy. He said one time while on shore leave in Croatia, they went to a pizza place. They couldn't read the menu, so they picked one at random. They were brought a pizza with a whole fish slapped on top.

What D&D race would that be?

Gnoll. Literally Reincarnation into a pile of awful.

 

[Jack Daniel]

Human
Cheese. If you go variant, you get a margherita.

 

[Eltab]

Tabaxi are the spicy sausage and jalapeno pizza.
It always sounds like a good decision at the time, but you know you will regret your choice tomorrow.

Tabaxi are better than that. My tabaxi character never gave me heartburn (or whatever).

 

[Charlaquin]

Halfling
Definitely a meat-lovers. There's always someone who wants a meat-lovers pizza, and someone who wants to play a halfling.

I’d actually say veggie lovers. Same idea, but fits the Halfling association with gardening better.

Bonus- Elves are calzones. They aren't even pizza, no one really wants one, and yet there are so many of them.

Nah, elves are very popular, but also very cliched. I might actually say they’re the pepperoni pizza, and half elves are, well, pepperoni on half.

Locathah are None Pizza with Left Beef. They only really exist as a meme.