Lyxen
Great Old One
What I am talking about:
- If someone affected tells me that the cover blurb on my copy of Oriental Adventures leans heavily into the exocitification of culture that's been damaging to people, I try to believe them, even if I'm really keen on my samauri and sohei character concepts and I like old kung-fu movies.
- If a woman in my D&D group (or outside of it) rolls her eyes and grimaces at seeing cheesecake art on an old Dragon magazine, I pay attention to that.
- If my neighbor's non-binary teenager wonders why all the relationships represented in the WotC hardbound adventure book I let them borrow are heterosexual, I try to listen to the point behind the question. And I believe that they see the exclusion that others might not see, and I believe that they are affected adversely by that exclusion.
- If a gamer in my group tells me that my depiction of fantasy slavery in my fantasy game strikes too close to reality and sucks the fun out of the game, I'm going to believe them.
I do NOT say:
- No, no. It's an homage to Eastern cultures! The writers don't have racist intent.
- But at least the half-naked woman is a strong role-model! Look, the male barbarian is wearing less than she is!
- I prefer to keep gender politics out of my fantasy game. No, no, representing ONLY heteronormative relationships is NON-political.
- It's just a game. I'm not trying to be offensive. You want to play or not?
I believe that they notice these things, that those things are in the work, and that it affects them. Does that help?
That is a great post, we (hopefully) come back to the OP and the question, especially about the first two points. Isn't the explanation more simply that these are old books from an era when most people had not realised the impact of their personal work and were only "people of their time" ? Of course, it does not make it right, but it certainly does not make the authors bad persons, it's just that we have (thankfully) come to realise that we should do better, and indeed this kind of mistakes are not made anymore. But does it really need extrapolating into "the past was very bad and they were all bad people ?"
Also, the main problem here, is that D&D was certainly not mainstream at the time, I think it's hardly fair to crucify them to follow the global trends of their time. Again, it does not make it right, but should they be specific targets, especially since most of the products are not harmful and, at least by my experience, D&D has always been a very welcoming community (for example, in engineering school, the French system of grandes ecoles being what it was, there were very few non-white people, but they were almost all members of the D&D club - although to be fair, our geekiness exiled us all together to the basement of the school)

Finally, for the last two points, I think it's as much a question of table rules and the themes of the campaign, as well as the limit of comfort for the players, as outlined, I think pretty well, in Tasha's.
For all these reasons, and while I totally support your perspective (it required a lot of coaching from my daughters, but I'm getting there), I want also to preach some moderation about the subject. Yes, D&D has followed some bad trends in the past, but it's much better, lots of efforts are being made and they will continue, but it's not an inherent flaw of the game or even its components.